Why do parents keep it a secret?

[LovelyAmelie]

I have seen so many posts from different platforms. Parents asking if any out there have used any particular tuition company for Reading boys school and all answers are vague or it’s pure advertisements.

Very hardly you see parents saying yep my child went to xyz etc and they’re good or we tried this and that and it didn’t work.

why are we not helping one another?

people don’t want competition or like to pretend dc is naturally talented.

I’ve used a tutor & am open about it

Honestly? Probably don’t want to arm their competition and ultimately it is a competition to get into these schools. I found those with slightly older kids much more helpful at sharing tutors.

Also a good tutor is subjective. There’s one who gets good reviews in local Facebook groups who I think is useless but I’m not going to start a fight on a facebook group about them. I did however message a friend privately and told her not to use that tutor.

Don't want to seem like a pushy parent? Don't want to seem like they're "cheating" or using money to get ahead? PP mention not wanting to help the competition, too.
A lot of people like to keep things hidden, like private healthcare, the fact they had an elective CS/used pain relief in childbirth/have botox, whatever. Not saying it would bother me, but some people care about it.

Yes it's the competition as pp have already said.

The less children have tuition, the more likely your child is to get a place so telling people how to get ahead like your child kind of defeats the object.

Ok, I understand it from a competition perspective but what about parents who’s kids have already passed the test from the previous year, no competition there, why not share information?

Tbh I never know if the tutor wants me to promote them. I feel I should check with them before promoting them and by then I generally forget about it all!

I found 2 of mine my responding to the tutors own adverts then discussing to see if they were a good fit. And 1 was by asking a friend who was head of department at my son's school and she put me in touch with someone in her team who was looking to do tutoring and she knew would be a good fit

Plus outside of Mumsnet I don't spend much time on social media anymore really