How to handle time off for a medical abortion at work

[Flailingsw]

I recently found out I was pregnant and am booked for a medical abortion next week. Problem is, I work remotely and my ops manager is traveling to visit my area next week for a tour/catch up. It’s been in the diary for months but I really need to take the day he is here off.

Not sure how best to manage this/who I can talk to within the company to arrange the time off as I do not want to disclose this information to him or wider upper management. For context he is new to the company and we are currently undergoing massive changes in company structure so trying to not rock the boat.

Please be gentle, this was completely unexpected (condom failure) and feeling emotional with the decision despite 100% knowing it is the correct choice.

I would plan to take the main tablets tea time so you have the evening to get the worst out the way. When I did this the next day was like a normal heavy period . I was only 5 weeks though. I also had minimal pain that was easily managed with normal painkillers

Is it 1 day you need to be absent for?

It's either that you phone in ill on the day with a reason that you can't be working from your desk and managing the illness? (it's going to have to be D&V I would think!)

Or

You will have to phone in ill on the day and say your Husband/Relative has been taken ill and you need to be with them

💐

Surely you just say that you have an unavoidable medical procedure on the day.

The employer might ask for evidence then. I'm not sure if this is something that happens at home or in hospital though?

Oh dear, you are going to get horrible gastro that day, what bad luck to have such an "upset stomach". Double check if you need a sick note, but I think the best thing is to suddenly come down with something awful which you cant possibly spread to your new boss.

All the best.

You call in sick on the day. You have norovirus and will be off for the rest of the week.

I would say you're having a gynecological procedure that day, surely that would ward off any further enquiry? Just say it's urgent and can't be rearranged.

Thanks everyone for your replies.

I get calling in sick last minute does mean less questions initially, however as the day will involve pre booked meetings with partners at their locations, and my ops manager will be traveling over 200 miles for this I will feel guilty pulling out on the day. I am solely responsible for an entire region so unfortunately cannot have someone cover these meetings for me.

It would be helpful if anyone has gone through this and had experience with HR helping manage this type of time off.

As far as I'm aware, HR is not entitled to any right to say exactly WHAT medical procedure you are having. So you can say you are having a medical procedure and will be out of the office, and leave it at that. As it is one day only, I would imagine you can self certify but if not, you should be able to get a note from your doctor to confirm you will not be well enough to attend work that day without giving the specifics -- albeit, I can imagine that will be a bit tedious.

Is it 1 day or more that you might need to be absent for?

Two days is what bpas has recommended

Are you attending a clinic?

PM me if you like.

I'd go the urgent medical procedure route so they/you can reschedule if required or plan differently.
As previously said, HR (and indeed your manager) don't need to know the details. Your doctor/nurse can sort out a note to confirm you need the says off. It's a pretty standard request for them.

You tell HR that you are having a minor medical procedure and need to take two days off. That's it. I think if this person is making a special trip it's important to be respectful of their time and do this in advance rather than just call in sick on the day. Good luck.

I agree with this. Rearrange the days beforehand, and say gynae procedure.

Sorry you're having to go through this, and hope it, and the work issue, goes as smoothly as possible.

I would say it is an unavoidable gynae procedure and leave it at that, they don't have any right to know any more (or even that it's gynae related). I would do it in advance, rather than ringing in sick on the day.

I took annual leave for my surgical abortion (pre pill days) as I didn't want to have to give a reason, but can understand that this isn't possible in your case.

I agree with either “unavoidable medical procedure” or “unavoidable gynaecological procedure”. Sometimes giving a little bit more info (“gynaecological”) can ward off additional questions because it really signals “this is private, don’t ask me”, but I think saying medical procedure would also be fine.

Hi OP, if it’s anything like my area you can take the tablets at home so you should be able to call the clinic and arrange a more suitable time to collect them and do it before/after the visit?
Sending hugs x

I agree. I really wouldnt make up a tale about norovirus. Best to stick as close to the truth as possible. Too complicated otherwise. They won't ask about this imho.

Hey,

I work in HR and have experienced this- 1 month into starting a new job so not ideal. I was honest with my manager and said I’d need to take the day off for the procedure, and work from home the next day incase there was bleeding/pain.
You could lie as these things happen- but I felt much better being honest and any good manager would understand and be there to support you. Message me if you have any more questions x

I agree lying isn’t ideal. But actually “unavoidable medical procedure” isn’t a lie at all. It’s the truth, unless someone is quibbling over whether the pills constitute a procedure I guess but I think in this case procedure is accurate. So she wouldn’t be lying, she’d just not be giving unnecessary private medical information.

Thank you for the advice! I’ve booked a meeting with HR this morning and will advise I have an unavoidable genealogical procedure happening.

Luckily I’m eligible to get the pills via post so not having to go in. I’m traveling for work currently so the 8th is the earliest I will be able to take them and would like to do it sooner rather than later.