Downstairs windows left open overnight

[Myohmyrtf]

Came down this morning and partner had gone to bed leaving living room windows wide open . We are about 3 ft from the road . Was annoyed but went upstairs and said you have left windows open . Earlier in year he left car unlocked on road and with keys on seat . If I go to bed before him I want to close windows so sure they are shut but he always says no , he says I said I can’t trust him this morning. I wasn’t shouting and was calm but don’t think it’s unreasonable to always want the windows shut downstairs as anyone could have climbed in . How do we get resolve this ?

Live alone, it’s so much better and you just get on and do it yourself.
(This isn’t sarcasm, I mean it!)

Do you have a dog? Even from upstairs, it would probably hear it, but I would generally shut downstairs windows.

No dog , he’s really annoyed that I said I can’t trust him to shut windows , I’m really annoyed he didn’t shut windows.

Change your windows to ones where someone can't climb in!

That does sound like really risky behaviour I wouldn’t be happy.
As a PP said if you have dogs at least there’s an alert system if DP is so neglectful with security.

We once had a PCSO knock on our door on a Summer day to warn us about leaving top
opening windows open in our lounge. He said anyone could climb in.
We had 2 large collies at the time who were barking like mad. I said thanks but I doubt anyone would try!
In a bungalow now but window sensors on the alarm system and two different but equally noisy dogs !

Is it a rental? If owned, who by? I ask to find out what the barriers are to you leaving the bastard.

He puts your property and personal safety at risk, but you not trusting him after he's demonstrated that he cannot be trusted is somehow the problem?

Come on, can you imagine having kids with someone who can't be trusted to lock doors to prevent kids from running out into the road, strap kids into the car seat properly, etc? Throw this one back.

My late DH used to leave windows open, the doors unlocked and the car unlocked. We got into a routine of running through everything before bed. It was the only way.

Or change the husband...

Windows left open overnight during a heatwave? Oh, the horror!

You cant trust him can you?. He either forgot to shut the windows or is too stupid to realise they cant EVER be left open when you go to bed. He has jeopardised your safety and compromised the security of your house. What would your insurance pay out if you'd had vandalism and burglary?

What he should be saying is "im sorry i messed up and I wont do it again". Hes thinking you have no right to be annoyed but you do. His problem is his failure to be accountable. I know people are different and some people are by nature, not very careful, but when its shared property and affects your safety, being careless has consequences, so he needs to own it and think about how to avoid this ever happening again.

Oh the horror of someone climbing into your home through an open window. I’ve been burgled and it’s horrible.

So you fit locks or catches so they can be left ajar, but not such that someone can climb in.

Does he live with you or does he just stay over a few nights a week? I'd be fuming obviously either way. If it's your house, does he think it's also your responsibility to lock up? It seems odd that a grown ass adult can't be responsible - this very very basic adulting stuff!

Surely windows that cannot be climbed through arent much use as windows? ie dont open sufficiently to allow much of a draught in?

If you know of examples of windows that allow a significant breeze of air in but dont allow people to climb in please provide some links!

The part of my lounge windows that open are tiny but I always shut them at night because the windows are close to the pavement and a determined, skinny agile burglar could get in. Leaving them open at night invalidates the house insurance and I dont fancy waking up to a random stranger in my house.

Its surely far better to have windows that can be opened wide....... but keep them shut if not close by (which is what Ill be switching to when I can afford to)

@Myohmyrtf yanbu!

Is he forgetful or does he just not care about safety/security do you think?

We have old sash windows in an old granite property - opened super high a small person could squeeze in but we can lock them at a couple of inches overnight. (They are draughty AF in winter, mind.)

He has hands, he can use them to close windows. It’s basic security at night. You’re right that he can’t be trusted. Is he happy to leave the front door unlocked? He’s coming off as a lazy shit who’d rather project his laziness onto you. Shift him onto to the living room sofa to sleep and as you walk upstairs say that you hope he’s given full thought to the security of the house overnight. As he’ll be the one dealing with it until he can learn how to behave and can come back into your bed.

I was reading yesterday about the benefits of sash windows........ I hadnt realised their great benefit is a breeze in (hopefully) at the bottom and the hot air thats indoors....... out through the top. Thats clever thinking!
They look beautiful Im sure but yes mega draughty in winter. Being able to lock them in position is a handy feature.

is it terrible I said can’t trust him ? He says that’s awful of me ?

But you can't trust him to shut the windows at night, as he has demonstrated.

That said, we have all have our moments.

Yes spend thousands of pounds rather than just ensure they are closed at night. 🙄 you can't trust him to close them so do it yourself for your own peace of mind. How he feels about that is his problem.

If it happens again you could hide something of his that he treasures and claim it has probably been stolen. My DH used to leave windows open until he thought his Ipad had been stolen ,turned out he had moved it. Ever since he is security aware and realises it is important. I was secretly pleased he thought it was stolen as he knew it was his own fault. He has been much better over security ever since. He called the police at the time and they advised not to leave windows open. The lock on the window is too high for me.

hes an idiot
trust is earned. hes not done that.
id lock the windows downstairs at bed time myself im future just for peace of mind.

My DH has left our doors unlocked so many times, even when the kids were babies. It used to make me really cross. Now I check myself before I go to bed, he gets cross if I close and lock doors and then denies ever forgotting to lock them. I just don’t trust him.

Or you just close them when you go to bed. I think that’s what most people do.