Neighbour annoyed at me for asking her not to collect our washing in.

[Firefliesdancing]

I arrived home today to find the washing had disappeared off the line that I’d put out this morning before work. It had rained heavy but I wasn’t too worried as I knew the weather was going to be scorching hot so they would be dry regardless. No note had been left, so looked on our cctv to find the neighbour over the back garden had got her husband to climb over on some ladders and take them in after peering in our back patio doors after realising we wern’t in.

We’ve only spoke to these neighbours a handful of times. It has made us feel slightly uncomfortable as I hate the thought of someone else handling my underwear/clothes/bedding. We went round with a small box of chocolates to say thanks and retrieve them. We asked them not to do it again politely and just leave them out as we have a drier if they can’t get dry naturally, thanked them again and left.

Unfortunately they are smokers (we are not) so our clothes had a whiff of stale smoke on them so rinsed them back through and put them back on the line as it was still boiling hot outside all dried within the hour. Knock on the door 20 minutes later after I’d taken them in. I assumed something was left so wasn’t expecting her to start having a go on the doorstep saying we’re not dirty you know, we did you a favour, not everyone is as nice as us we like to do things for people.

I was a bit taken aback so just said I’m sorry we’re trying to put the kids to bed, again thank you for your kindness and closed the door.

Does anyone else find this behaviour bizarre…maybe it’s the heat, I’m tired and I’ve missed something…is it the norm for people you don’t really know to collect your washing in when it rains?

That is so odd and I wouldn’t have liked it either.

Our neighbours climbed over the fence and took our washing in once, too. However, they only did it because they lit a bonfire in their garden, didn’t realise how smoky it would be and noticed our washing out (all baby clothes at the time). They were really embarrassed and apologetic. I was very happy they’d brought it in under those circumstances. I would not be happy in yours!

So even in all the hot weather we've had you still wouldn't hang washing out? 😲

She will be grateful they won’t be doing her any favours again. This behaviour smacks of boundary trampling, quite literally. The OP is right to be horrified; I would be.

Yep.
These past few burning hot days i’ve even saved a load of electric & wear & tear on washing machine; by only draining washes, not spinning at all.

This neighbour needs telling to stay out of OP’s garden, if they fall off their ladder they’ll probably try & claim on your insurance🧐.

The only person who removes other people's washing from their lines where I live, is a thieving bampot with drug habit.
The grapevine normally alerts when she's back in area after prison/rehab/upsetting the wrong person.

Neighbours taking in washing without being asked, coming over your fence via a ladder, then holding it as a smokey hostage bundle is weird.
Her coming back to challenge you on your decision about them not touching your washing is utterly batshit.
These are neighbours to be avoided (imo)

They did a nice thing. They are good neighbours. These are the kind of neighbours people usually want! And how would your clothes smell of smoke? Do you think they stood next to them smoking? I think you're being unsocial and petty. Sometimes I'm like this too, and I am trying to recognise it and be better. But it's the kind of thing I would have got upset any until I really thought about it. They were being good people

That's not what objections are for, its public for any reason you believe there should be something looked at which would stop it. Some spectacular arrogance to talk about "interfering ".

I always hang washing on the line and it always smells lovely when I bring it in. We are in the countryside though if that makes a difference.

Yes and many people take advantage of good weather to do the washing and peg it outside as well as washing items you don’t regularly wash such as all the winter coats while you know they’ll dry in an hour in this heat.

The thing that would annoy me most is the futility of you getting up early to get everything hung out, and then having to rewash 😭 I would be so pissed off! We have multiple sports teams/kits and my washing is done in strict rotation, otherwise we’d never have the right things ready on the right day. Mine also have asthma, so any hint of stale smoke would cause an issue - dirty fuckers! Like they think you should be grateful for them contaminating your smalls 😩

They are being nosy not neighbourly

You're definitely the weird one. In the UK it's the norm to hang your washing outside. Imagine using a tumble dryer all the time because you hate the environment. Eugh.

I find your behaviour odd. They were doing you a favour in their eyes. Leave it at thst. Ok rinse it if you want to but use a bit of discretion about putting it back out.

I’m only 46 and taking a neighbours washing in when it rained was normal. Also taking their bins in if they weren’t home. Much more community spirit. I find it hard to believe that others don’t remember their parents doing this.

Our gardens weren’t as fenced in back then so no fence climbing involved. The smell of smoke would bother me, I don’t think smokers realise it be it is normal to them.

Yes they do and there is nothing wrong with it, no idea where you live that your washing stinks … mine certainly doesn’t!

If it was me i wouldn't have climbed a fence but i would of help you
if you rewash the clothes I wouldn't assume straight away I was the problem.
We don't smoke .so would of left it there
But the fact that you don't care to wear or use clothes that have been rained on ... is disgusting
They always smell
So does bother you a bit cigarette smell but not damp lol fascinating

Yes that’s why the environment is in the state it is … a lot of it down to the ‘good ol’ USA”. Put everything in the dryer and drive their massive cars everywhere! 🤬

I would be wondering what they are expecting in return for these unwanted favours.

She’s in America … so enough said!

I'm with you - but it seems we are in the minority.

Not sure where you live, but pretty much everyone hangs their washing out where I live. It’s just the norm. The washing smells so fresh when it’s brought it off the line.

The only time I don’t hang washing outside is (my sons clothes) is between June and September when hay fever season is in full swing where we live.

I do not want neighbours climbing over the fence into my garden for any reason short of risk to life. You might want "neighbours like this" but I doubt that many people do. Similarly peering into my windows. Clothes would smell of smoke because they have been in the house of a smoker/smokers. I'd have to re wash too. I take your point that there are people who genuinely believe they are being "good neighbours" when they are most definitely not. I'd rather put a stop to the good neighbourliness ASAP, gently if I can, less gently if not.
PS I have got lovely sane NDN's on both sides where I live.

That's such a sad response to a kind gesture. I wonder if you are from a city? In Wales this is just what neighbours do! Maybe it's a small town thing

They must have made a fairly comprehensive list of the original laundry to 'know' OP had rewashed it.
Now that is creepy. As is using ladders to access a neighbour's property to take in laundry which, even if it experienced a heavenly shower, was obviously going to get crispy dry again in minutes.

most of my adult life I have lived in villages. I was born in London and my mother had a lovely city village around her all her life No one ever climbed over her fence and called it a good deed though. And its absolutely NOT a kind gesture to make newly washed laundry stink of cigs.