Was I wrong to move to the spare seat next to my husband?

[Inastatus]

I’m just after opinions on a situation I had on the plane yesterday. 5 of us flying - only 3.5 hour flight so didn’t pay to book seats. Airline put 3 of us together but split the other 2 - me and DH volunteered to sit away from each other. No problem with that, that’s the chance you take if you don’t pay to reserve seats.

However, before take- off someone moved seats leaving an aisle seat right next to DH’s aisle seat so I asked one of the cabin crew if it was ok for me to move there and he said yes once we had taken off. As soon as seatbelt lights turned off I moved and started chatting to DH. The woman I sat next to tapped me on the arm and said quite rudely ‘our son is coming to sit there - we asked’. I was a bit taken aback so just mumbled ‘I asked too’. Obviously I didn’t want to cause a fuss or get cabin crew involved as I didn’t want to sit next to disgruntled passengers for the rest of the flight so I went back to my original seat. The mother immediately put her rucksack on the seat to save it and eventually her son, who was in his 30’s, wandered down to sit there.

Am I right in thinking that they were no more entitled to the seat than me and her rude attitude was really uncalled for?

How would you suggest they track it. Maybe bring a whiteboard so they can write up all the seat moves people have asked for and co-ordinate it. Or they could spend that time getting on with their actual jobs instead

Personally I wouldn't move unless the free seat was directly beside the person I wanted to speak to..

What child?

Not the question, and no mention of 'children'.

You have awoken the Mumsnet Kraken. You shouldn;t have budged but kind to do so - i bet their Sonny Jim wouldn't have minded if you'd stayed put ! I'd have sweetly said ' finders keepers'.. and left it to them to involve the poor F..A. The way some people go on about flight seats you'd think they were in them for days not hours (Oz flights excluded as they actually are days)., with a Berlin Wall twixt them and their beloveds( who also couldn't be arsed paying for a seat)

I have no idea ! That is something for them to sort. Not the passengers.
Organising any seat moves I would assume is very much part of their job.

Organising any seat moves I would assume is very much part of their job.

Not really, TBH in many ways passengers moving seats in flight, when allowed, is a favour not a right...

The cabin crew have enough to do on boarding and during the early stages of a flight, which is when these moves often happen, without introducing some sort of formalised system.to control the musical chairs...

It's always been a case of if a move is OK'd it's first come first served..

We have to disagree then. I think it is part of their job. If it isn’t what business have they of agreeing to any seat moves !

OK...so bearing in mind pressure for on-time departures and then the need to get checks done on taxi out, then the need to get the prep for cabin service going once the wheels are up, where and when in this whole process do you expect the cabin crew to get together/use a white board or whatever to actually coordinate between themselves requested seat moves before the seat belt signs go off?

If it isn’t what business have they of agreeing to any seat moves,

As much as anything they're doing it as a favour, and TBH it usually works fine - most passengers seem to manage to understand perfectly well that if a move is agreed they have to get to the vacant seat PDQ after the seat belt sign goes off..

If you really want to blame anyone in the case the OP described it's the adult son who it seems was very slow changing seats.

That's what I assumed. She'd asked the person who was allocated the seat to swap, so it was morally hers/her sons. Because if she hadn't asked/organised the swap, the seat would have been occupied and not free for OP.

No children mentioned in the OP.

The only thing which would give her more say would have been to pay for her man child to sit next to her in the first place

when I have flown with my 18 year old he has specifically asked me not to get him moved if there is space next to me

allegedly I chat too much, ‘make friends’ or fall asleep 😂😂

What??

Errrr I think you need to re read. OP and husband were sat seperately, other 3 together. No little kids left alone.

I would not have moved. The person was lucky enough to get an empty seat next to them and you took that away. It would be different if the seat was directly adjacent to your husband and he was the person who now had to bump elbows with you for the duration of the flight.

Malinia, why do you think booking choice of seat exists then, ? Yoi explakn tbat. Its clearly to secure it under their name. Just cause you feel financially tight and don't want to, a person whos put their money onto it is more rigntly is a priority as they have paod a fligbt excursion unloke a person who geys given any seat by not personally paying tbe premium extra.option.

IF you had all in the group gone by the pay for the choice of seat premium then could of all chosen seats next to each other to avoid the issue in tbe first place. Its being more organised you chose not to secire a chooce of.seat with premium from tbe start ao tbat all.comes onto your own actions at the start.

You know, some people actually like their DH and enjoying chatting to them 🤷🏼‍♀️

I don’t agree. It’s no more your possession than any other seat on the plane save the one you’re on. OP asked to move there so had a legitimate right to it.

Was it a crew mis up or a total lie from
the mother of the 30year old?

I would have moved probably as OP did, largely as the use of ‘my son’ would have got me. 😂

I'm obsessed with mine but I also don't need to make a fuss for a short flight.

Was a child mentioned?

Why would you be anniyed?Not relevant to post but I do wonder why.

Cabin crew here, if you had both asked (I presume different) crew and they had both said that’s fine after take off then first come first served. OP, I’d have said ‘well I asked too’ and stayed there! If the other lady had then complained to the crew I’m sure the answer would have been ‘well it was a spare seat so no one has an automatic right to it, and unfortunately this other lady is now sitting here’

Probably you were both right--you each asked different flight attendants and each said sure, when the plane was in the air. You were more aggressive in getting the seat. Did you wait till the seat belt sign was off or just move right away?if you moved too early (before you were supposed to) and thus grabbed the seat, then I can see why she would be annoyed. Otherwise I guess it's whoever is more aggressive wins. You were more aggressive initially and she was more aggressive later.
Personally I think if you have a reasonable aisle seat you just stay put. And that goes for both you and her son. But that's my opinion.

Best answer on this thread in my view, and also to @notimagain who points out that cabin crew have far more important things to do than sort out seat battles when nobody has paid. (and you should pay if you care that much) Flight attendants get this on every flight, every day, with people that really should behave better. I still think it is very generous that they sometimes let you move at all, but while there is flexibility there are always going to be those who feel they are more entitled to make the move. Maybe @Inastatus missed out a bit because of not standing up and protesting, but it she has already said it won't spoil her holiday, and sometimes, the stress of doing so hurts more than just letting it go. People are really weird on planes. I'd take the moral high ground, you have let someone do something that seemed to need it more than you, regardless of whether they actually needed it. You have been kind, and I hope you are having a great hols xx

its public transport- you can’t police who sits next to you unless you’ve paid for the seat.