Help me help my son with death of dog please.

[sidneytweeney]

I don’t know what to do/say to him. My lovely 9 year old son accidentally left the side gate open this morning, our sweet little dog got out and she’s been hit by a car (we assume). Our neighbour found her and took her to the vets but she died on the way. We’re devastated, obviously and my son is inconsolable. He thinks he’s killed her. I’ve said all the things. It was an accident, you didn’t mean it, we love you. We don’t blame you. I don’t know what else to say to him. He’s been on his bed since 10.00 a.m this morning. Won’t eat or drink. Won’t get his head out of his hands. It’s not like him, he’s usually responsive and can express how he feels but I can’t get through to him. Any ideas? Any suggestions on what to do would be so appreciated. There’s no dad in the picture, just me my 10 years old and his tween brother, who has also tried. Thank you x

Gently OP, I’m not sure the rescue centre will want to rehome with you again when you haven’t secured your garden. It’s not really fair to the dogs.

Oh give over. Do you not think we would have come away from this with a huge lesson learned? I’ve had rescue dogs my whole life and this is the first mistake like it. Despite the tragic ending, Maud (and my other pets) all live happy, spoilt lives.

Thanks so much x

I'm glad he's doing a little bit better. 💐 His friends sound awesome. It's good that he's talking about the rescue shelter. Of course, Maud cannot be replaced but I hope that there's another rescue dog somewhere out there who needs his love and care. x

Thank you xx

@sidneytweeneyI won’t ’give over’ Every rescue I know wouldn’t consider it.

But you may home through irresponsible rescues.

Go away, troll.

I‘m glad your dear son is doing a bit better op, it’s a horrible thing he’s going through and it’ll take time. I know you’ve mentioned another dog, and you know your son best, but I just wanted to share my experience, for what it’s worth.

When I was 10, I got my first dog, he was amazing, I was obsessed. He was stolen from our home when I was 13 and I was bereft, properly heartbroken, not eating, not sleeping, same sort of emotional distress as your son by the sounds of it. My mum suggested another dog, and I thought it was a good idea, but once we had her, I admit I sort of hated her for not being MY dog, iyswim. We couldn’t bond and I felt appallingly guilty about it, and in the end, she became my brothers dog, really. I still feel bad now for not giving her my best (and this was 20 years ago!) but I got another dog, for myself, a year later, and it was a different ballgame. I adored him, every day of his daft little life until I lost him 3 years ago.

I just feel that maybe more time might be a consideration. I’m aware it’s not my place, and ultimately you know best, your son, your dog, your home. I just wanted to, gently I hope, add a viewpoint.

Best of luck with it all.

Morning, oh that’s so sad 🌸. I’d had similiar thoughts actually. I don’t think I’M ready for a new dog !! I loved Maud too … I’m thinking the new dog would help the boys though. We won’t do anything anyway until after August when we’re away for 2 weeks but thanks for your advice and sorry to hear you still feed sad/guilty about after so long! These dogs really do get into our hearts don’t they? X

Hi just wanted so say thanks so
Much for everyone’s kindness- I don’t have a family to reach out to so this space was very useful.

We cremated Maud and have a little tree and memorial for her in the garden.

my boy is a little better and seems
ro be coming to terms with her death now.

Thanks again xx

Bless you @sidneytweeney - that was a lovely thing to do for Maud. Every good wish to you and your boys. x

🌸🌸

Apologies, quoted wrong person. Hope your lovely DS is feeling better OP x

If it's any help at all, we lost a little dog (she was only young) under very similar circumstances when I was 10 and I was absolutely devastated. We did get another dog quite quickly as she was my little saviour and I grew up with her.

Thank you xx