Urgent advice needed from teachers! Whats my legal standing?

[SongforSal]

Help!

This may be outing, but I am past the point of caring.

As not to drip feed, this is the background.

My DS13 had childhood absence epilepsy. He has been symptom free for 2yrs, although his consultant in Oxford has warned he may yet get further seizures. Due to having dozens of absences every hour around the clock, he became academically behind, as he was effectively 'unconscious' standing up, ergo missing vital pieces of information.

Whilst at primary we had him assessed in YR6. The educational psychologist issued a report to say he was Dyslexic, and recommended a statement. We have been fighting ever since, and are getting no help.

DS is now in his third year of secondary. Almost on a daily basis he receives a detention-not for anything malicious, but what is deemed as unacceptable behaviour, talking, answering back etc. He gets a talking to at home to. However, sometimes the detentions are for reasons which I can't fathom, an example being a couple of weeks ago during a 2hr lesson, he urgently needed the toilet. The school has recently changed it's policy that children can not be excused for toilet breaks, they must go in between lessons. He told me he thought he was going to have an accident after trying to hold it in, and literally had to run out of the classroom. This resulted in an after school detention.

Moving onto this week, he has received another after school detention for talking and not concentrating in class (he finds it difficult to keep up with writing due to his dyslexia). I contacted the school to say he could not have an after school detention that evening, as his Dad was working away, and I was also 20miles away at work and would not be able to collect him in time (we live in a village location and he relies on the school bus). The deputy head told me if he failed to turn up to the after-school detention, he would received a 'Head' detention this Friday. When I explained it was impossible for me to collect him, I was advised if he failed to attend that, they would exclude him!

I am at a loss! Can a school exclude a child because I cant psychically collect him? All I need is a little notice for an after school detention, and I can arrange something, but this is too short notice. Does anyone know what our rights are?

It doesn’t sound as if they would be able to show they have made every possible effort to meet his needs.

If they have a copy of the report and it states severe Dyslexia then they really ought to be taking it more seriously than they appear to be. Do you see a copy of their Provision/SEN support plan? Does he have any interventions or anything at school?

OP if you put your local authority and ‘Local Offer’ into Google, it should signpost you to a range of services and one of these should be a parental advisory service. Ask for a meeting with the SENCO and form tutor and take someone from this service with you (and tell the school you will be doing this). They will be able to make the legal standpoint very clear to the school.

Obviously don’t excuse the behaviour (doesn’t sound like you are) but perhaps ask that they explain what allowances they are making for his processing problems. Extra time in assessments? Additional time to answer questions? Pre-teaching concepts where possible, allowing him to read aloud to a trusted friend rather than the whole class etc.

It’s not up to you if he does the detention. If you refuse to let him do it then you and he will have to face the consequences.
It’s not mean to say a child can’t misbehave at school and disrupt the education of others.

That detention sounds really harsh, have you spoken to the teacher? There may be more to the story than you currently know.

Absolutely the work needs changing, he needs a laptop or similar. Maybe even a verbal translator that he speaks into that types for him.

He must be very frustrated, and it's coming out as shitty behaviour. The key is nipping this now before the behaviour rules the other stuff IYGWIM. Once the behaviour is entrenched, it's so much harder.

School need to work with him to put together a toolkit to help but he needs to be aware that he needs to try, and to to give work a fair go. Does he wear glasses with lenses? Use an overlay? Is this happening in class? Sometimes pupils don't use their tools even though they have them.

I teach a few very dyslexic children, some with global development delay. I have one who's now so used to kicking off after saying it's too hard (won't even try) that the behaviour rules the other issues. The work has been changed and broken down, laptop etc to help as much as possible but he will not engage. This is years of the cycle of can't/won't.

Definitely get a meeting with senco and head of year/house. The more helpful you are, the better you can work in partnership with the school.

SongforSal

The school don't actually need your permission for the detention, in point of fact they could set one for that night thanks to gove and if he misses it they can escalate using their sanction policy.

I will also point out that because SEN can affect behaviour it is insulting to try and pass it off as the only reason.

Thankyou all for the positive replies. Believe me when I say, I am NOT one of those Mums who will dismiss their child's behaviour/attitude. I am exhausted for him actually. But the cycle of 'punishment' may work for other kids, but for him it has the opposite effect.

Recently in a lunchtime detention he was given a book to read. When I asked how it went, he said 'boring', when I asked him to elaborate he said he couldn't understand some of the words or what it was he was reading. He has in the past told me he is 'thick' and 'stupid' which, as a parent is bloody heartbreaking. I can 100% see when he acts out, it seems like avoidance. Better to be asked to leave the lesson than feel ashamed.

I talk to him on a daily basis, every morning and evening about school. I am involved and bloody concerned. More so his reputation that the school portray does not mimic his behaviour at home-Sure, I get the odd slammed door in a kevin and perry type fashion, but for a hormonal 13yr old thats not the worst thing.

Bloody kids!

Why are half the class doing lunchtime detentions? Is the teacher unable to keep control of the class? Is this part of the problem?

Rumboogie

Yes, lets blame the teacher for the behaviour of 10 -15 teenagers.

The actual term is terror, terrored or terroring this means to subject a teacher to a continual stream of intimidation and abuse with the intention of causing the maximum amount of stress.

That lunchtime for many may well be not done homework type detention for all offending non homework completers.

More so his reputation that the school portray does not mimic his behaviour at home

Why would you think that his behaviour in school should mimic that at home? in many threads on here there are parents posting that their children are wonderful in school but difficult at home.

School has so many more pressures. Lots of kids act out in class but one to one or at home are totally different.

It's changing this that's hard.

RUM Recently policies have been changed at the school. One teacher insists prior to entering the classroom each pupil must be holding their pencil case in their hand ready to work. On that occasion, they were rifling through bags-ergo the mass detention. The school has a 'good' rating on OFSTED, it is worth noting it is the first term, and 2 of his peers have left the school . One of which is a pretty much A grade student (one of my dc;s friends) who received a record breaking 13 detentions in one week. His parents pulled him out last week funnily enough. I am not honestly sure between any behavioural issues, and all the new rules an policies where the line is drawn.

Surely almost daily detentions must raise a huge red flag to the school that something is seriously wrong. This is more than misbehaviour. The child is constantly struggling. Why aren't the school investigating?

You're going to have to let him do the detention, and either wait for you at school or come home by taxi. But you need to become the squeaky wheel and nag nag nag his Tutor, Head of Year, Head of Inclusion, SENCO, until they put some support in place for your ds. At the very least, all his teachers must understand his dyslexia and its possible effects, and that he has a history of amnesia which has affected his learning, and possibly his social skills as well.

You have two issues here:

1. He needs more support with his learning or that you feel the measures he is supposed to receive don't happen. Make an appointment and ensure he does get the support arranged. The school must do this and you will need to be proactive in ensuring that it does by making a nuisance of yourself politely with the senco.
2. His behaviour. He is not helping himself as even with the best support he needs to work hard to apply strategies and work with his difficulties. You need to perhaps be more vocal in supporting the school when he gets into trouble because of his behaviour. I suppose the school's perspective is that you need to arrange the time to collect him even if it is inconvenient to your working arrangements. If you really can't do it, I would say he won't be attending and the school will have to escalate it and your ds will take the consequences. I would then be focusing my annoyance on my ds for creating the situation and causing the problems through his behaviour.

Sorry, epilepsy, not amnesia.

I also have a child with severe dyslexia and he gets loads of help and support from his school.

I’m shocked that your son is getting so little and also at the tone of some of the responses on this thread .

Op I suggest that you get it moved to to SN education boards where posters are supportive and knowledgeable.

Aha! This is a zero tolerance school! The pencil cases are the clue...

This'll be a hard one for you, OP ,as they will rigidly stick to consequences. It works fro many many students but your DS may be struggling and/or kicking against it.

jelly I agree. I am happy for him to do the detention, unfortunately circumstances outside my control this week mean I cant get to him. My Dm has kindly offered to pick him up, (she phoned me just now...apparently dc called her when he got home upset :( ) Yes, he is really struggling. Oddly one of his teachers (the only one I think!) seems to really like him, and took him aside today for a chat and support. He thinks she is the dogs bollocks and says he really likes her.

That teacher is going to be vital. Get them in on the meeting. They may well turn out to be the mentor he needs.

Call supportive parents, they're very helpful and knowledgeable.
Good luck with it all.
For the ones saying child is naughty and do accept all punishments, I don't agree.
Behaviour is a form of communication. I'd say this child is struggling in some way. You should definitely be involved with the sen I at school, if not then arrange this. Hope all goes well

wolfie READ this post. I have not refused to let him do it. You are missing the point entirely.

Kr1 How do I get this post moved? Sorry. Never attempted that before :)

@SongforSal sorry didn't tag you on my last one. The school has a legal responsibility to make reasonable adjustments under the disability discrimination act. As I said on my last post, definitely call Supportive Parents!

Not missing the point. The school don’t have to choose a day that suits you. They have given notification. That’s all they have to do.
If there are SEN issues then get support for that but they don’t excuse bad behaviour.

I certainly think dyslexia can result in poor behaviour tho I’d expect disorganisation to be the primary issue and talking back etc.to be a secondary one coming from frustration/not being engaged. I don’t tolerate rudeness BUT this comes parallel with support -from what you’ve said I can recognise your sons behaviour as the kind that can be very testing but I’m also not surprised if he’s being left to it with little consideration of his needs. Defo get the senco involved although I also doubt he will get an ehcp.

The Shakespeare example sounds like the teacher was being unreasonable unless Radingbthe passage was something the class had been preparing for - definitely I wouldnt spring “read this passage of Shakespeare to the class” on any but the keenest beans