Friendly names to call kids who make a stupid mistake

[noblegiraffe]

You know, the ones you have a good relationship with, not talking about berating some sensitive y7.

What, in mock exasperation, would you call a pupil who had e.g got a fiendishly difficult differential equation question wrong and you'd just spotted it was because they'd written 1x1=2?

Naught the OP is not talking about general name-calling, they are talking about making light of a silly mistake. The underlying reason is, paradoxically, to boost the pupil's confidence by reassuring them that their apparent failure to answer a question was not due to lack of intelligence but just a silly mistake!

The OP is also not talking about all pupils, just ones they know well and would understand how it was intended. Some people posting here seem to fail to understand the rapport that teachers work hard to build up with pupils over the years to get to this point.

Nincomepoop!

There are a lot of people on here making the false assumption that teachers 'know their pupils' and can always know how to read whether they can take it. Seriously? How arrogant can people be.

It's also not OK to do it just because the child is bright and has made an unusual simple error. IME, some of the cleverest students are often the most self-critical and can still have self-esteem issues. Yes they may laugh and smile, but inside feel humiliated in front of their classmates.

I've witnessed a number of teachers 'enjoying' teasing the brightest children, it smacks of bringing them down a peg or two and the rest of the class love seeing it happen. How pleasant.

"Joey Essex" for the ones that are just a little lacking in common sense.
"Brainiac" for the ones who make mistakes.

Are you a teacher, Silver? (Just interested, sounds like you are based in a school). Primary or seondary?

There are a lot of people on here making the false assumption that teachers 'know their pupils' and can always know how to read whether they can take it. Seriously? How arrogant can people be.

^This^^

You might think everyone is having fun and all affectionate and chummy, but you just cannot be sure. The teacher/student relationship in a classroom of 20-30 kids is hardly an even power dynamic. The kids are not in a position to be completely open and honest with you. That's why I think it is better to be safe than sorry. It's like also sort of jobs where you deal with people: be warm, be approachable, but have some common sense and err on the side of caution when it comes to boundaries.

My 4 year old gets- doughnut, sausage/ silly sausage or spanner he finds it hilarious

My kids get called "Div", delivered deadpan and with no malice whatsoever.

However with kids that weren't mine, so by definition that I didn't know well, I'd be very careful.

I still remember a primary teacher calling me a Narna and although I laughed along I was upset for days.

I was a sensitive child on the quiet though.

With respect Chubby, he's 4.

Imagine how an embarrassed and hormonal 14 year old might feel.

I discussed this with both my DC before they went to school this morning. DS is 12 and DD is 10. They both felt there are times when it's suitable for a teacher to call someone a name like for example, numpty. Depending on what the error was (and they both felt saying 1x1 = 2 would be one of those cases). I don't think either of them has been called a name like that at school but if they were and told me then I would ask them about it and if they had been a numpty would say so.

now that is pretty arrogant and presumptuous to assume that anybody who disagrees with the use of name calling isn't a teacher and knows nothing about the subject

Equinox didn't say that anyone who disagreed should go and start their own thread. Equinox said non-teachers should start their own thread.

Where people are disagreeing, it would be helpful to know whether they were a teacher, as they could explain why they disagreed based on their experience.

Are you a teacher Frusso?

Fully agree with Frusso, I can't see why name calling in any way is acceptable. It's a belittling form of 'humour'. There are countless ways of having banter with students about a silly mistake without making a personal remark, however 'funny' the remark is.

I might make a joke with my own dc if they did something nitwitty, but the joke would be about the mistake being silly, not the child.

Would it be appropriate for a manager at work to call a team member a name? There's a big difference between:

Oops that was a bit "d'oh"

and

Ha ha oops you dumbo"

As for the pp who says only teachers are qualified to comment here Anyone who's a parent who's dc go to school are perfectly entitled to have input into how those children are treated.

Some kids like a bit of a joke, some don't.

I'd say the same about some parents as well

I understand people saying that they would find it upsetting, although as I posted upthread, it's the only way of being told off that I didn't find humiliating at school. So what to do with people like me?

As it happened, I really struggled when I entered the workplace and minor mistakes were met with fury and ranting instead of gentle banter. I'm 40 now and I still feel physically sick and panicky if someone shouts at me. School is a very gentle place compared with the world of work.

Some kids like a bit of a joke, some don't.
I'd say the same about some parents as well

Couldn't agree more!

Well it doesn't mean people who don't like stupid jokes have no humour.

I love comedy. Just not dimwitted name calling. It's not funny.

"Banter" is often mistaken for comedy.

Errrrrrrrrrrrr name calling is name calling is name calling is name calling is name calling. It doesn't matter why it's done,

There is absolutely no difference what's so ever. Here's another example how it can lead to issues my best friend has always been put down by her mother by her teachers by every one, done under the guise of being caring, affectionate, just friendly banter. Now she's in her mid thirties, and I can not say very much to her without her going oh I'm thick I'm stupid, I'm an idiot. When I ask why she thinks that her reply is always "well everyone's told me so. My teachers my mum my sister I must be I had to go to tribunal at work for bullying because I'm dyslexic" . It doesn't raise confidence at all in fact it takes what little people have. I'm only not in the same situation because I went to a very good high school where I was told yep my written language skills and my social skills weren't great but I was a charming child who took everything in.

As has been pointed out even the brightest child might feel offended humiliated embarrassed, because they haven't taken it in a friendly way at all.

You look at the words your all using "teasing" ok again so it's ok to tease children is it, oh let's all just tease the kid in the wheel chair and call him wheels? Oh cos you know it's only fun it will boost his confidence.

Or the kid with glasses and call her four eyes because oh it's only banter.

Or the kid carrying a little too much weight because they won't feel humiliated.

Or the English as another language learner because hay they won't understand any way. that's how it's bullying who ever said for fuck sake how is it bullying. Because any sort of name calling is bullying. It's done to isolate humiliate and embarrass

Aren't all they great examples of light hearted jest and banter?? Oh wait no, if you heard a child doing that you'd reprimand your own or think not a lot of the schools anti bullying. Yet oh ok yeah w teacher can do it because you know it's funny. And all the pupils will take it in the manner it's meant. Not true. I alone have given you three examples of why it would affect w child. My sister, my best friend and myself. Not one common diagnosis between us. Very very very different people.

Silver you've absolutely described my sister, brilliant lovely (I know she's my sister I would say that) very very clever. But calling her a numpty muppet ninconpoop dope would have affected her for weeks and really pulled her down.

You might not have seen it but I have, words can do so much damage

"Maybe, as this thread is in a staff room, anyone who isn't actually a teacher could go and start their own thread and stay off a subject they know little about?"

Well, seeing as how most of us are parents, I think it's safe to say we have a vested interest in how teachers treat their pupils.

My son, for example, who is struggling with reading, would be devastated if his teacher called him a numpty, or a muppet, or a div. He might not let on in school (so the teacher would be blissfully unaware that his/her lighthearted joshing hadn't gone down well), but I'd be the one at home dealing with a whole evening of tears, followed by all the careful work we've been putting in trying to get him to read being destroyed by the ensuing loss of confidence.

Fortunately, DS's teacher is utterly lovely, totally supportive, and much too professional to do this sort of thing.

And (as ever) remember mumsnet is a publicly accessible internet forum with an enormous readership, not a closed forum just for teachers to let off steam (and I understand the need to let off steam - but I am very, very careful not to let off steam about my job in public).

I work in schools, I vary from a...

Check again with a pen poised over the error, with a wry smile, eyebrow raise. If I know them really well- wombat, moose, crotte- which is French for bogie.

Younger kids- banana brains, silly sausage, wally.

You may have a vested interest. Doesn't mean you know anything about the dynamics of a classroom though.

Arrogant parents who think they know best are half the problem in a lot of classes.

Maybe, as this thread is in a staff room, anyone who isn't actually a teacher could go and start their own thread and stay off a subject they know little about? hmm

Oh so parents know little about having to deal with w child that's been so humiliated by being called names by teachers they refuse to even go to school?

Parents know little about when the child comes home and goes my teacher called me a muppet I'll never go to uni or her w job?!

It's the parents that gave to deal with the fall out and see what it does to a child when a teacher thinks it's all friendly banter and the child's taken it in good humour

My son, for example, who is struggling with reading, would be devastated if his teacher called him a numpty, or a muppet, or a div.

At what poing did anyone say that a teacher should call a struggling child a numpty, muppet or div?

We're talking about making light of a capable secondary-age pupil making a daft mistake that they wouldn't normally make.

equinox er no but the parents know the dynamic of their very upset child

Thier Childs well being should be compromised because you know the great dynamics of the classroom

I call my own children all kinds of things in affectionate exasperation ... usually fruit, for some reason.

In class, if I make a mistake when writing on the board, that is a 'quack quack oops' moment, complete with associated hand motion, or gets a dramatic 'd'oh' complete with forehead-palming. A child who has had a 1x1=2 moment FOR THEM - what is a silly mistake for one is a completely understandable misconception while trying their hardest in another - might get a quiet 'can you spot your [quacking hand motion] there?' as i look at their work. However, we do a lot of discussion around 'learning through mistakes' - celebration of not getting something right first time, a mistake being something we can all learn from, etc - so the 'whoops' response is quite rare. I do try very hard to focus on 'the thing that is wrong' rather than 'the child (or adult) who has made the mistake'. I have to confess that once or twice I have slipped from teacher to mum mode, though in response particularly to 9-10 year old boy playground silliness rather than their work, and called a pupil a banana...