Harry just protecting the other "spares"

[Magnoliasunrise]

Shocked to see in this mornings Telegraph that Harry is concerned for the other "spares" He just wants to break the bad parenting pattern and stop it happening to Charlotte or George. If I was W&K I would be absolutely LIVID by now. What does anyone else think?

www.telegraph.co.uk/royal-family/prince-harry-interview-bryony-gordon-spare-book/

If you were feeling charitable towards Harry, you'd say that he is concerned because William does not know what it's like to be 'not the heir'. And I think it probably is intrinsically hard to be 'nearly the special one'. Especially when they are just your annoying older brother or sister.

The dynamic is different in the generation above Harry possibly because Anne was a girl, in an era when lots of families gave preferential treatment to boys. In interviews with her, it's very clear she was brought up to know her place in the family, and doesn't see that as a bad thing. Andrew and Edward are 12 and 16 years younger than Charles. They are essentially two separate sets of childhoods. For Harry and William's generation, it's much more normal to treat your children as equals and Diana and Charles probably did try to do that. But it clashes with how things work in terms of inheriting the crown. William and Harry are not equals in the Royal Family.

As with others though, you can't comment negatively on how your sibling parents their children and expect it to go down well.

Although Harry is has insight into being brought up as the spare in the British Royal Family, his experience has many unique features that Charlotte and Louis (hopefully) won't experience, on top of which society is not quite the same now as it was then. There are plenty of other European royals navigating similar challenges in the 2020s who are likely to be sympathetic. William and Kate have met most of them. If they wanted advice, they could find it.

@LlynTegid , as pp have said, Anne is a "spare".

Bringing other people's children into it is really awful in my opinion and does nothing to improve my view of him.

He's deeply damaged by a range of experiences in his life, and who can blame him for feeling strongly about those experiences, but he's still pushing for a half out half in arrangement.

If his experiences are as bad as he outlines, I don't understand why he would want anything to do with the royal family when he can be a very wealthy private citizen, live with his wife who he loves and they can raise their children away from the whole dysfunctional mess.

Harry was quoted word for word by Gordon, whom is an ally of his of many years. It is a very flattering article, that tries to win over the readers. In my view it fails miserably not because of the reporting, which is flawless, but even with sympathetic and thoughtful reporting - it still sounds like Harry is somewhat detached from reality and slightly unhinged.

I would love to know what Gordon actually thinks about his state of mind.

Harry seems to want to 'save' the world and his family and seems delusional at best.

Since Kate seems more switched on than most of them, and comes from a functional family with parents who work, I would imagine she will be quite keen to raise Charlotte and Louis to be capable adults who know how to use a credit card, can cope with money and the tube, can furnish a flat without help, and have marketable skills they can use to support themselves. It's nice of Harry to worry but he should concentrate on doing what's best for his own kids, particularly as they are growing up in a family where turning in your relatives and cutting them off is the done thing.

And yet, despite being The Spare being the worst thing that could ever happen to anyone ever, Harry has named his charitable foundation and production company after Archie.

I wonder how Lilibet will feel being the spare in her family!

Not in the order of succession until it was changed in 2013(?) Prince Andrew was second in line until William was born.

Good point!

So is it different being a spare (or second in line) to being third in line? What are they, nothings? Anne and Edward have seemed to slot in their places okay.

According to his logic anyone with more than one child is having spares.

There is a point to it . They are going to an ex tend go though the same thing as him , although maybe Kate will protect them ? Who knows . But to an extend I bet they will always feel second best

I wonder if some childish discussion took place between W & H, when they were very little, that they would reign together? Or whether Diana promised Harry that William would never let him end up the equivalent of Andrew (whom she must have seen was gearing up to live a pointless existence post his military service)? Harry doesn't want to revolutionise, he wants to be top dog. He's Napoleon the Pig. I wonder if he thought William would fulfil that ambition through a joint reign or something, and feels betrayed that this is never going happen.

H needs to stop projecting his numerous issues onto his nieces and nephews. He needs to sort himself out, stop taking drugs and learn a skill so he can get a proper job instead of making money slating other people.

I'd be bloody livid if I was the Waleses. He's basically intimated that William wasn't interested in his own children's welfare when he raised it. I fear he's now going to make a living being a commentator on those poor kids' lives. Every time something happens he'll be the go-to 'expert' for the few media outlets he's decided aren't awful scumbags. But because he'll speak openly and not behind the cloak of 'royal source' anonymity, he'll convince himself he's being a crusader rather than the absolute shit-stirrer he will be.

I have zero concerns for the Cambridge children.

Kate comes from a very 'normal' family that are stable and rooted in reality. They look like very stable, loving and down to earth parents to me, comfortable and relaxed with parenthood.

One of the things William apparently loves about being with her family is the relaxed affection and easy going homely feeling, they are raising their children to be well rounded, normal children with the added dimension of being connected and related to the RF as far as I can see.

Diana came from an aristo background and nannies etc did the lions share of raising the children, the same re Charles. No wonder they couldn't figure out parenthood easily.

Harry should stick to talking about his own children and the drawbacks of growing up in LA with two unstable parents.

His continued delusions and paranoia are the biggest arguments against the legalisation of cannabis.

Didn't Diana express concerns about Harry, something about him saying if William didn't want to be King he'd do it? An issue from an early age perhaps.

If he is concerned about the welfare of his brother's children, he can make an anonymous phone call to Social Services.

This must happen in many families where there is a family business like farming or a large estate, so one child, usually the eldest, inherits the business or estate. What happens with the ‘spares’ then?

How do RF in other countries cope?

Where did this phot come from - they have cut the bottom in the Telegraph's version now 🤪

I think the children are going to be the new battleground and source of competition between Harry and William, Harry is for sure really goading William, unless the RF are resolute with an absolute refusal to engage, this is where it will play out.

I get the impression (let's face it, very few people were close enough to know for sure) that both Georges were happy to be 'spare' and live a private life. One of the things the Queen Mother held against Edward VIII and Wallis Simpson was the early death of her husband, caused by the pressures of being king.

George VI's brothers did OK as well, enjoying the benefits of their position without the pressures of being first in line. And George V was a notoriously distant and scary father...

Anne and Edward seem to have managed OK, after some searching for a role from Edward in his 20s, to put against Andrew. Anne was the 'spare' for a good ten years, and they all had the issue of how to find something meaningful to do when you are a child of the monarch but not in line for the top job.

So I am not sure you can draw many conclusions about 'spare syndrome'. The issue for the younger children is finding a meaningful occupation (not necessarily a paid job) that fits with having a parent who is a monarch.

For me as a parent, this would have overstepped a mark where I'd never forgive or go back.

To publically comment on my children, express concern for them, implicitly criticise my parenting or care, to place yourself as a better judge on my children's welfare than me, all publically.

Then no. I would cut you out my life completely. Never let you near my children again and never allow you any access to my life to prevent any basis for further public intrusion.

I would be completely done.

@stormywaves H needs to stop projecting his numerous issues onto his nieces and nephews. He needs to sort himself out, stop taking drugs and learn a skill so he can get a proper job instead of making money slating other people.

I agree completely - sadly getting a proper job won't make him enough money for the lifestyle he and his wife crave.

He’s Uncle Fester now