Was Princess Diana really as saintly as Harry (in particular) and the media make her out to be?

[Nosleepforthismum]

Just curious really to hear from those that remember the news coverage from when she was alive. I was only a kid when she died but some of her behaviour i.e. the Martin Bashir interview seems a little … dare I say, twatty? Is it not a basic unwritten rule that when you have kids with someone and then you split/get divorced you don’t slag off the other parent? I find it an interesting decision that she did that interview despite knowing the global interest it would generate and seemingly not giving a damn about how it would impact her kids.

But that is just a way she was taught to talk in interviews. Just as Kate is usually photographed doing an exaggerated laugh presumably because she thinks it is a more attractive photo. Anyone in the public eye, and especially women, do things to look and sound better in the media.

Really? A “let’s bash someone’s dead mum” thread?

Sigh.

Yep. Bloody awful isn't it. From her mannerisms to her mental health. Some very unpleasant people here.

This. She wasn’t a saint, no, but was more sinned against than sinning.

A story, I went to the exhibition of Diana's dresses at KP some years ago. It was in dim light, with the dresses in cases and film of her wearing them played beside them. Walking around, I realised something-most of us were women of Diana's age (obviously older by then) It was very quiet, almost silent. We caught each others eye at times and there were looks of a sort of recognition and I don't know, understanding. Lots of tears being shed.

Rare the sort of charisma to do that to people, once in a generation perhaps.

She was and she wasn’t. What she did for charities and children was generally looked upon very favourably but her private life was not, and some of it was with good reason.

She used the media for her own gains and benefit but struggled when it did the same back to her. She came from a dysfunctional family and married into another one. I did not have a high opinion of her but it's always sad to die so young and I'm not really sure what chance she ever had for a comparatively normal and happy life.

Heaven knows why but I get quite uncomfortable with people wanging on about Diana being "mentally unstable" and "manipulative" when she's not here to defend herself! It seems unfair. "Mentally unstable" is not even a legitimate diagnosis is it? It feels like the sort of misogynistic old fashioned accusation Victorian men used in order to gaslight their wives so they could oust them from the family home! I thought we were living in more enlightened times.

Yes she had a very dysfunctional childhood. Yes she had an eating disorder when younger. And a strange obsession with alternative therapies and whoo! But I doubt many of us reading this would be able to withstand the overwhelming level of press intrusion and public scrutiny that she endured and retain our sense of humour like she did.

It takes quite a bit of mental strength to be able to get up every day, get dressed and head outside, meet new people, and do your job when you are constantly being hounded by journalists. And I imagine you need to be quite disciplined and robust working within a small team, constantly travelling and when lots of peopled are scheduled to meet you, you can't exactly cancel on them. She may have been lacking in self esteem when she was young but she definitely had gained strength and confidence towards the end of her life imho.

And she and her step-mother Raine Spencer forgave one another later on and went out for jolly lunches together apparently.

Nosleepforthismum · Yesterday 13:12

Just curious really to hear from those that remember the news coverage from when she was alive. I was only a kid when she died but some of her behaviour i.e. the Martin Bashir interview seems a little … dare I say, twatty? Is it not a basic unwritten rule that when you have kids with someone and then you split/get divorced you don’t slag off the other parent? I find it an interesting decision that she did that interview despite knowing the global interest it would generate and seemingly not giving a damn about how it would impact her kids

A few thoughts:

• She was worried about losing custody of her children to the RF if she didn't go public. This very thing had happened to her mother when she had squared up to the establishment so it was a very real fear. Diana was being briefed against in the press by Charles's friends so she knew she was in the firing line. They wanted her to "go quietly" and she was worried she would be labelled unstable or unsuitable and she would be separated from her children.

• I think she was confronting the same brick walls that face Harry now! Prior to the book, people forget that Diana had been very discreet and loyal to her husband's family. But when you find yourself in opposition to possibly the most powerful family in the country and their friends, you have to go nuclear or don't bother!

• She had been duped by Martin Bashir to believe that there were even more malevolent forces against her than was in actual fact the case.

• Whether it was accurate or not, I think she regretted criticising their father's suitably to be king and said so afterwards, as it was that which ultimately prompted the Queen to insist on divorce, which Diana didn't really want.

• People always say it was very poor form of her to criticise Charles because of the negative effects on Wills and Harry. But think how damaging it would have been if she hadn't exposed the reality of Charles"s and Camilla's long-standing relationship? Remember the general public had heard rumours about it but no one was sure if they were true. It was not common knowledge at the time. We assumed it was all made up by the papers so when her book and interview exposed the truth it was shocking tbh! So the RF had wanted Diana to pretend in public that everything was fine, that she and Charles were happily married, and they wanted presumably the children to collude with that lie in public too? Why does no one write about how damaging that would have been for the children?

Diana was an icon bigger than Madonna/Michael Jackson etc. Her clothes were copied, as soon as she wore something it was all over the shops and we bought it. Her hair was copied. It was hysterical I remember that. But she was a tremendous force for good whatever her failings. Like destigmatising Aids by holding hands with Aids patients in hospital when there was no cure. She was someone to look up to and the public devastation when she died was collossal. The sheer sea of flowers at the palace....

I think the rewrite of Candle in the Wind and Elton John performing it at the funeral played a large part in how people subsequently remembered Princess Diana.

I cried when she died and I laid down some flowers at Sandringham, the nearest place I could get to.
It was and still is a tragic untimely death. I know it’s pointless but I can’t help thinking that if she was still alive, Megexit etc wouldn’t have happened.
She wasn’t a saint, no, as a pp said who is?
But I think she had a kind heart and she deserved to meet her grandchildren, and I’m sorry that she didn’t.