Was Princess Diana really as saintly as Harry (in particular) and the media make her out to be?

[Nosleepforthismum]

Just curious really to hear from those that remember the news coverage from when she was alive. I was only a kid when she died but some of her behaviour i.e. the Martin Bashir interview seems a little … dare I say, twatty? Is it not a basic unwritten rule that when you have kids with someone and then you split/get divorced you don’t slag off the other parent? I find it an interesting decision that she did that interview despite knowing the global interest it would generate and seemingly not giving a damn about how it would impact her kids.

Well many children feel guilty for not protecting a parent when they divorce and maybe that's true. Poor William. But I'm pretty sure Diana would have already known before William did.

@ShamedBySiri Diana said she knew very early on, but William did not know she knew. William should not have known anything.

@ShamedBySiri I was not talking about the later divorce but about the affair. William felt guilty that he knew Charles and Camilla were having an affair and he did not tell Diana.

Singingwithseals I’m not remotely outraged but you have to be careful when assessing that book of Jephson’s because some of the negative things he wrote about Diana in it - there were lots of good things too - were written before the deception by Martin Bashir had been discovered.

So he was writing in the context of having been suddenly “dropped” by her and was understandably upset.

Only later did he discover that Martin Bashir had shown 73 fraudulent documents to Diana, including mocked up bank statements, which “proved” supposedly that Buckingham Palace had been paying Jephson for information on her!

And that lead to her sudden loss of trust in him and the frequent accusations of “paranoia” about her!

If you remember, Jephson sued the BBC successfully for loss of his job and damage to his reputation and win.
I think he gave his winnings to charity if I recall.

He has since made several press appearances and written several articles which have been much more understanding of Diana’s behaviour at the time, given that she had been subjected to this gross deception.

^ Absolutely this BradfordGirl!

I would say he was seen as much more of a catch back then than people now would think.

The point is not that he was or wasn’t a catch, but that at 32 he should have known better.

He was apparently taking advice from Lord Mountbatten. I don’t know if that absolves him of some of the blame (the Queen and Prince Phillip must have known atleast some of his reputation), or just makes all of them sound much worse.

If William did know about his father's affair with Camilla and didn't say anything at the time, I feel even more sorry for him. It has become all about Harry, but William was very little older and it appears more embroiled. Awful for him.

I think that Harry takes after his mother quite a lot.

To answer your question, she was very beautiful, not the brightest. I feel she was good at manipulation and mentally unsound which became more apparent the older she got. I think the instability was always there but being set up when she was little more than a child to marry an older man who didn't love her and intended to carry on with the one he did love tipped her over the edge.

I'm too young to remember Diana in the 1980s, but the lead up to her engagement is much discussed and it's clear that she was young, naïve and not terribly well educated when she joined the Royal Family. It's widely believed that Elizabeth II thought that Charles had treated her badly, and so she did better in the divorce than she might otherwise have done.

However if you take Charles and Diana's respective behaviours from about 1990 until her death, they're surprisingly evenly matched. Diana's charity work was probably more notable in addressing unfashionable causes. But Charles really did champion the issue of climate change pretty early on. They both tried to use the press as weapons against the other and to manipulate public opinion. They both did tell-all interviews and books. They both had relationships with people who were married, and arguably at this point some of Diana's were the more reprehensible. Both loved their sons, attempted to be good parents in their own way and there is evidence that their children loved each of them. Both were arguably a bit over fond of the privilege and wealth they enjoyed. Both wanted William to be King one day.

Diana was unfortunate to fall victim to Martin Bashir, and that probably drove some of her more erratic behaviour with friends and associates. She probably also had bigger mental heath challenges than Charles - it's known that she had bulimia in her 20s at least. There's some evidence that she used William as an emotional support in less than ideal ways. But on the other hand, she did try and ensure that Harry was not treated as lesser because he's not the heir.

She was not the magic person that Harry wants her to have been. She was very interesting though.

She practically became saint Diana after she died. She was an extremely flawed human being when she was alive, who made some dreadful decisions and had major struggles with her mental health. She was a lady with a good heart, but could be calculating and manipulative. She was far too young to marry when she did.

I am about the age Diana would be if she were alive now. I always thought the marriage to Charles was inappropriate - to me he was an unattractive old man and I couldn't believe she really loved him. As for him, it was obvious from the engagement interview that he didn't love her.

I watched the Martin Bashir interview when it first went out and was shocked by the intimate details she gave. I thought she came across as very unstable and self pitying. Can't remember if I watched the interview with Charles that happened earlier though.

I never really liked her much but did like the fact she apparently took her sons to do normal things like eat burgers. Other than that she seemed like an attention seeker.

I feel more sorry for her now as she was clearly coerced into the marriage and simply had no idea what she was getting into. Her family home life was also pretty dysfunctional which probably explains a lot.

Her death was weird as we all became obsessed with her plus it was unbelievably shocking. The story of what exactly happened emerged gradually over time. Initially the driver was said to be sober and there was a huge search conducted for a car that might have hit her car in the tunnel- which came to nothing.

I never shed any tears but her death was sad and brought into focus her better qualities. We went into London the night before her funeral and looked at all the people camping our and holding vigils - very strange and memorable.

It also happened at a time in my life when several colleagues died, including a very young person, so the time was quite emotional for me.

No she was no saint but she was kindly and she did get involved with things that others wouldn't, like visiting Aids patients at a time when people were truly terrified of catching it, and campaigning against landmines.

I see her as a beautiful, but sad and lonely person, with dubious mental health and no one, apparently, to advise her. Don't know what she'd make of Harry and his antics as I'm don't recall anything she said being quite as disrespectful and/ or possibly untrue. She spoke about her own side of things mostly, rather than making direct rather bitchy criticisms, though they were obviously implied viz a viz Charles.

Will Carling was a player. Wouldn't have been hard to have an affair with him.
D was known or flirting with married men.
She was manipulative.

She was made out to be a saint after her death, but she knew what she was doing.

She was not an innocent going into the marriage.

for not or.

There is also an attempt to rewrite history and portray her as a mad manipulative woman in the attic type.

Interesting you say it’s an attempt to rewrite history. It’s what was being said about her when she was alive too, by those who knows her. Which was often downplayed after she died and she was regarded as saintly.

‘Mad’ is a horrible term - your term - but she did have mental health issues. As you yourself sat, she had bulimia. And those close to her say she was manipulative. Which is also a word used about men albeit less often. To use synonyms, she was known as being cunning and shrewd and controlling.

She was also in some ways a snob, as you’d suspect given she was gentry.

The OP asked what those of us who were adults when Diana died made of her and was she a saint. The answer is clearly no. That doesn’t mean she wasn’t also charismatic, fun and often kind.

🤣🤣🤣🤣

@SingingWithSeals Diana had bulimia and at times depression. She spoke openly about this.
It was when it became clear that Diana and Charles would split up that the stories started about Diana being a crazy crazy woman who could not be believed.

It's not pleasant is it this thread. Some posters ridiculing a woman who died young and in a horrible way. Jesus. No peace even in death.

Yes but there’s lots of testimony from her friends and staff and others that knew her that she did often not tell the truth, or was inconsistent.

Regardless, she definitely had some flaws, which is the point of the thread.

I haven’t heard of princess Anne being criticised?

I haven’t heard of princess Anne being criticised?

All the time when she was younger because she wouldn’t play the game. Diana was welcomed because she was a proper Princess who wore beautiful ball gowns, unlike Anne.

She was portrayed as bad tempered, snobby and awkward.

I agree. RIP Diana. Which of us are saints on here?

She did a very tough Save the Children trip in various African countries, apparently the press pack could barely keep up with her and with almost one voice changed their minds about her overnight! Her response when she was attacked by a gunman in the mall made everyone sit up and show her proper respect as well.

The point is that Harold the Dim is making her out to be one.

Give over 🙄

That's very harsh. He was 12 when she died. Harry's behaviour has been appalling but he can think what he likes about his poor dead mother. I've had 3 major bereavements. My DF, DM and DB. All of them flawed but I focus on their many good points now.