Struggling with how I now feel about having cat pts at vets instead of at home

[Indecisivelurcher]

I am struggling with the passing of my cat. He was pts 2 weeks ago. I'd booked someone to come to the house and pts but had to rush him in the evening before due to fly eggs. I didn't want him to suffer maggots. I know it was the right thing to do but it was all rushed and stressed. I had 40 minutes from realising the situation, speaking to vet, picking up kids and helping them say goodbye, got him to vets, they were really busy so it was almost too efficient feeling. Obviously quick is good for him and i know logically i did the right thing. I just wish he could have been at home in a patch of sun. And I really miss him now.

I have only ever had my cats PTS at the vet's for various reasons. So please don't blame yourself, and try to divorce the manner /emergency nature of his PTS with your sadness at his passing. You did what you needed to do for your beloved cat and a veterinary surgery PTS is a perfectly valid way of doing it, especially in an emergency situation.

If your cat was very sick, then an efficient process at the vet's was almost certainly the kindest thing, even if in an ideal world you would have had a bit more time.

I am sending you much sympathy. I have had so many cats PTS over the years, it is never easy, but we do the kindest thing we can by them.

Thanks Prune

I'm so sorry for your loss.

After losing two dogs and seven horses I can confirm it never gets easier but I still can't understand after years and years of fabulous precious memories of happy times all we do is keep punishing ourselves replaying on loop the last few minutes of their lives like a bloody video recording that plays again and again and again. I think its all part of grief.

Look after yourself, you did the right thing for your beloved pet. X

The one time I had one of my cats PTS at home was a total disaster, I rang her as it was obvious he was going to die really soon and was struggling to breathe. Smoky always hated the vet.
I said look its really urgent and she said i'm almost finished with my last client I'll be with you quickly.
Shortly turned out to be an hour later by which time my cat had a heart attack, choked on his own vomit and died in my arms. I was totally traumatised.
When she finally rolled up I said where the fuck where you? She said she'd had a cup of tea and a long chat to the last client so had been delayed.
I was absolutely livid, mine was an emergency and she said she'd be there quickly and she was drinking bloody tea.
If I'd know that's what she was doing I'd have rushed him to the vet and let him die with some dignity. It's 7 years later and I still cry every time I think about it. Smoky didn't deserve an ending like that. He was the sweetest cat ever.

@Gettingbysomehow poor you and Smoky, that sounds really traumatic! You should read Hangry's post above yours, I'm sure they are right in what they say.

I’ve had all of mine PTS at the vets. I don’t think I’d like it done at home. I couldn’t tell you why, I just wouldn’t. Mine always behaved beautifully at the vets. If they’d been hat home they’d have been trickier.

My vet visit at home for my cat to be PTS was also a disaster. Whoever came - and I don't think it was a vet, I think it was a nurse or vet assistant - forgot a vital piece of equipment so had to go back to the surgery. The administration of the sedative and then the final drug was so clumsy and my cat panicked - it was awful. I'd expected a confident James Herriot type of vet and to come in and take control, instead we seemed to get someone who didn't really know what they were doing.

Both my cats were PTS in Covid times, a year apart. The surgery was not offering home visits, and owners weren't allowed in the building. Both times I handed a cat in a carrier through a doorway, stood in a car park for a few minutes with other pet owners, and was handed an empty carrier back.

It was pretty brutal, but both times I know I ended their suffering as quickly as possible. I still well up thinking about it though.

You did the right thing, avoiding further suffering, but of course it still hurts. Let yourself grieve.

I’ve only ever had mine pts at the vets. Then bring them home to cycle and grieve.