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The litter tray

Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

New kitten is here, senior saw her and growled. Advice welcome.

11 replies

WildFlowerBees · 21/07/2026 11:44

So as per my last thread about losing my familiar her brother has become so withdrawn since she died not eating well refusing to come downstairs for food. We’ve feeding him upstairs, he’s started to venture back out into the garden which is a positive. We took him to the vet who said he’s lost 300g in 5 weeks and he’s possibly depressed.

We didn’t get this kitten on a whim, she’s here because my poppet isn’t and I still can’t get past her dying seeing her brother so quiet is breaking me.

So we collected the kitten from the rescue, brought her home set her up in the spare room she’s a confident friendly menace, the day after I needed to open the windows it’s been so hot upstairs so I was taking her downstairs to put her in her play pen whilst I gave the room some air, inadvertently our lovely fella intercepted us and after staring wide eyed he growled at her, no licking no tail wagging just a growl she gave the tiniest hiss and I walked away and shut her in a different room with her blanket, litter food water etc.

He knows she’s here, we’ve started scent swapping and he doesn’t really seem to be able to muster enough care to seek her out or be aggressive.

But now he’s seen her I feel like we’ve got it wrong I wanted to keep her hidden until we did the scent swapping etc.

Any advice? Both dh and I spend a lot of time with him and that hasn’t changed we tag team between giving him the usual fuss and in the spare room with her.

Any tips on how to make this a positive experience? It all felt so right but now I’m wondering if I’ve made a massive mistake. We didn’t get her for us we rescued her in the hopes it would give him another friend. I feel a bit overwhelmed today.

OP posts:
InQuiresandplaceswheretheysing · 21/07/2026 11:52

Just give it time and patience!

RandomMess · 21/07/2026 12:15

The growl may just be “don’t pester me”. Try not to panic

caringcarer · 21/07/2026 13:18

I expect you cat was just surprised to see a kitten in his house. Keep scent swapping, then put kitten in a little cage and have your older cat move around the kitten. Do this twice daily for 2 weeks. Then pet your older cat and partner bring kitten over about 1 metre away. Repeat then gradually bring kitten closer. Once your cat is used to kitten being around he will be fine.

WildFlowerBees · 21/07/2026 14:10

Thank you @caringcarer

Next question is it ok to leave her in the spare room overnight so I can sleep in my own bed and actually get some sleep? Last night was dh turn to sleep in the spare room with her. It’ll be about 7 hours, I don’t want to leave her alone if it’s going to cause her any issues.

OP posts:
Gardenisablooming · 21/07/2026 14:16

Same boat 6 yeses ago op. Dcat 8 died.. his db was depressed. Lost weight. Sat howling out the back garden . Broke me.
And I caved and got a rescue kitten.
Literally added a letter tray , 2 bowls and a bed to dd's room where dcat slept and left them to it..
2 weeks in. .

New kitten is here, senior saw her and growled. Advice welcome.
NewDogOwner · 21/07/2026 14:25

Get one of those Feliway plugins. It mimics the hormone released when a mum cat has kittens and it helps them bond and accept each other. Worked for us.

user293948849167 · 21/07/2026 15:30

Let them sort it out, older cat probably just letting the new one know he’s the boss.
Sounds like you’re doing everything right but cats need to sort things out for themselves sometimes.

Also yes you can leave the little one alone overnight as long as the room is all safe

StormGazing · 21/07/2026 15:35

Is also suggest feliway and cat nip. My female didn’t like the new kitten so brought him another boy kitten, they’re great and female tolerates the boys
wjen we introduced her to old DCat it took years off him, ok sure she expended his life a few years!

Sheandhercat · 21/07/2026 15:36

My cat is very friendly with other cats but even she will growl and hiss at a cat she doesn’t know in her own home. It’s normal don’t worry. We brought a kitten into our house when our boy was 5, so he wasn’t a senior but he was very chilled and not very playful. He hated the kitten so much because all she wanted to do was play with him. He got so fed up of her chasing him and diving on him all the time, so even though there was no aggression, our boy really didn’t like the kitten and would hiss at her and scream at her all the time. I had to keep them completely separate because she just terrorised him otherwise and he was getting very stressed. Said kitten is now 3 years old and goes outside so is a lot calmer and they get on great now and even play together when older cat is in the mood. Depending on your older cats personality, it can take a long time

Aydel · 21/07/2026 16:59

Mine still barely tolerate each other after six years.

New kitten is here, senior saw her and growled. Advice welcome.
RandomMess · 21/07/2026 17:52

My older boys ask to be let out when the kitten is being too demanding of them wanting to play!

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