Neighbour fed my cat and took him to the vet

[Tigeresslearns]

I know I'm talking to the sensible here.
I've recently had to have my lovely boy pts. He was a roaming rascal that had to have his tail removed previously. He was also a lazy groomer so needed me to bath him on occasion too - not fun for him or me! But he was ours and was loved.

Anyway, I got a text a couple of weeks ago from a neighbour, who even after repeated telling by me to NOT feed him, had done so for a couple of years. He spent some time sat in her garden enjoying the sun. She knew I was his owner. She had my contact number and knows where I live.

She'd decided to take him to a vet as he had been unwell in her garden for 24 hours. She hadn't contacted me before this at all to tell me as I would of gone straight there to get him.

I called the vets, they'd done bloods and he was in kidney failure so I made the sad decision to pts. I couldn't get there before they would close for the day so I wasn't even there to give him strokes and love.

Adding to this, at the weekend I came across a fb post from the vets that they'd posted at the time, stating they had him and to call them as he was unwell. Comments underneath included some very strange or hurtful comments, including someone sharing my address and that I had 'abandoned' him. Thankfully the vets removed the post straight away when I called them.

Who the hell does this?

Things I've learnt:

Check your cat's chip is registered - my boy had been chipped years ago but for some reason the vet I'd used hadn't completed the registration or told me I had to complete the registration. It's been a pain but I've now got my other cats registered to me so it doesn't happen again.

Do not feed cats that don't belong to you. There are so many other means to care for a cat who you think it lost/abandoned/unwell. Posting on local fb groups get cats reunited really quickly usually. Or if you know the owner, tell them their cat is at yours. Any responsible cat owner would appreciate that.

I'm so sorry this happened, wtf!

Your poor cat didn't have time to say goodbye to you - it's heart breaking.

Your neighbour is a moron.

FFS take a day off, eh?

Exactly this about the end comment. I would have needed to see my cat with my own eyes in person but that said if they said he was suffering and imminently dying it’s different! I’m sorry for your loss x

So this neighbour who knows who this cat belongs to Tigeresslearns watched for 24 hours this cat getting sicker and sicker then didn’t have the courtesy of telling Tigeresslearns that her cat was ill.

Maybe if this neighbour had called Tigeresslearns at the start then maybe the outcome could have been different

Maybe the neighbour shouldn’t have fed the cat in the first place then the cat would have gone home and been attended to quicker by Tigeresslearns

I am honestly disgusted by people like this.

I had a Vetinary nurse go into my cats file and report me to the RSPCA for neglecting a cat. The cat had gone in because her feeding tube had become dislodged. She had a genetic condition and was always a thin cat. Cat also had a raised heart beat and sounded like she was panting when breathing.
We had spent £8000 + trying to find out why she had these conditions and was she in any pain. It was a genetic condition and we knew she wasn’t going to be a very longed lived cat but we wanted to make her few years with us a happy time

She was a playful girl and ruled our 4 boy cats who were in awe of her she would play hide and seek with them and would rule the roost.

When her feeding tube became dislodged I didn’t think anything of taking her to the vets to help reinsert it.

The vet insisted on trying to get her heart rate down first and her breathing under control.
No amount of trying to tell this woman that she wouldn’t be able to do that and just needed to get the tube back in as it was a genetic condition fell on deaf ears.

They put food in her cage which she didn’t eat. She had spent nearly her whole life being tube fed.
Cat got thinner and thinner
I got a call from the RSPCA to say they had a report that the cat needed to be taken to the vets immediately

Given how cats were registered at the vets (dh’s name and my telephone number) I knew it was the vets who had used information to report me.

RSPCA were very confused when I said cat had been with the vets for nearly a week and they were refusing to put her feeding tube back in and effectively starving her

In the end dcat had to be pts
It was heartbreaking

I have never trusted a vet since.

Sorry for the loss of your cat.
The other points, are just the risk you take when you have a cat that is allowed to roam. If they go onto other people’s property, those people may interact with it.

This is a UK forum, so it's 'neighbour'. HTH

How on earth do you work that out? She says her bloody neighbour seduced her cat, fed it even while knowing exactly where it lived and who owned, and this person had no idea of the cat's history or any medical issues. Kidney issues can be quite silent and then go critical quite quickly - this has happened to us with two cats. Cats can anyway mask illness until it's pretty much over, which is heartbreaking for a loving owner who would have done more if they'd been aware.

I'm glad the neighbour took the cat to the vet but I think it's unconscionable that they didn't contact the cat's true owner to tell them, or hey, ask permission. In the UK, where most cat owners allow their cats a full life and allow them to come and go, cat 'theft' where a cat is seduced from where they live and from their loving family, is getting more common.

This.
Of your car roams onto other people’s property than they can do what they like.

This.
Of your car roams onto other people’s property than they can do what they like.

So sorry, Tigeresslearns

I can't believe some of these posts. Of course she should have called you before taking him to the vet. Who on earth wouldn't?

At the very least to see if there was anything else known about the cat's illness first, if only to tell the vet when she got there. And presumably, if the vet didn't contact you straight away and put up a post on FB instead, your neighbour lied to them and told them she didn't know who the owner was when she took him in. Really inappropriate of her.

Statistically in older cats it’s much more likely to be ckd and whilst OP hasn’t mentioned his age, her posts read like she had him for a long time

No, they can't, and UK law actually says this. They're not game birds FFS

I should say actually - one of mine had a fairly steady decline and had started getting bladder infections and peeing a lot which we were told at the time was a sign, but the other had an acute failure and it was really quite startlingly fast.

Im so sorry you’ve had this experience OP. Obviously the bloody self righteous busy body should have called you. Some people get a kick out of this sort of thing. the vets hate all the drama they bring.

From the neighbour’s perspective, she’s probably watched the cat becoming more and more unwell over many months and has been waiting for you to step in and take him to a vet. For whatever reason, you didn’t notice the signs of kidney failure but your neighbour may well have done and would have been growing more and more frustrated. I suspect she didn’t disclose the owner’s name to the vet because she was worried you’d just take him home again without treatment. A vet can’t override an owner who denies treatment (not without a lot of legal hassle) and the neighbour might have thought the cat would have more chance if listed as a stray.

I’m sure you would have tried everything to save your cat, regardless of cost, but it’s important to understand what it must have looked like to the neighbour.

I’m so sorry for your loss 💐💐

You need to reframe your mindset though else this will eat you up.

Your cat was very poorly and your neighbour did the right thing by taking him to the vets as quickly as possible.

She shouldn’t have fed him and she should have rang you sooner but that’s neither here nor there anymore.
The most important thing is that she was kind enough to take him to the vets.

I completely agree with you about the microchip thing though.
My cat became poorly and randomly ran away.
My microchip was still for my old address and I hadn’t gotten around to changing it.
I couldn’t find him for days and the only way I found him was by ringing around all of the vets every day and fortunately some kind person had found him and took him there.

I understand how you feel but ultimately the right thing was done for your boy ❤️

Makes you wonder why the neighbour left the cat for a full day before doing something if the neighbour was so convinced op was a dreadful owner and had been watching the cat decline over months.

Once again, kidney failure can come on extremely quick in a cat - this information is easily avaiable on Google - so its pure speculation this wonderful neighbour (who left the cat a full 24 hours) has been watching the gradual decline of ops cat. As I said earlier one of mine went from absolutely fine to being PTS within 48 hours and thats accounting for us noticing something wasnt quite right and the first vet visit where bloods were taken.

This happened to us . Our lovely 16yo boy went missing a few years ago . Despite searching for him we couldn’t find him and assumed he’d wandered off to die peacefully.
2 years later out of the blue we got a call from the vet . Apparently an elderly lady who lived nearby had taken him in & kept him indoors. When his back legs started to fail she took him to the vet & left him there , telling them that he didn’t belong to her . The vet traced us through his microchip
Sadly he had to be pts but we were lucky to have the chance to say our good byes - just bewildered as to why she didn’t tell us where he was when we were knocking on doors , frantically looking for him . He was gorgeous so can only assume she wanted him for herself ( until it came to paying vets bills that is !) .

I had had my cat a long time too. He still went downhill in days. Yes, CKD is common in older cats. It is also an over simplistic diagnosis.

Glad you decided to help explain feline medicine to a vet though.

wtf, she knew who he belonged to so why on earth wouldn’t she let OP know? That would be the first port of call for any sane person!

Try reading a few of the posts on here explaining that there are more reasons for kidney failure than long term CKD. People put down poison for rats and mice. People change the anti freeze in their cars on their driveways. People grow lilies or related plants in their gardens. All these can bring on ACUTE kidney failure i.e. sudden, with nothing wrong before, brought on by toxins poisoning them.

A cat so ill with kidney failure due to CKD it needs to be put down instantly isn't likely to be going out & about roaming 24 hours beforehand. It would be absolutely skeletal, and even an unobservant owner would have noticed the major change in eating and drinking habits and general behaviours.

I'm so sorry for your loss and the hurt that you didn't get to be with him and say goodbye as you would of wanted to. When I was a kid we had a cat who was very independent and liked to go out and about during the day. One morning he leaves as my mum is heading out to Sainsburys for the weekly shop. Nothing remotely unusual.

Normally he'd be home at tea time and would sit on the mat and we'd let him in. No sign of him. Wasn't particularly worried as he'd stay out at night sometimes but I went looking for him the next day. A few days later still missing and had been knocking on doors.

A neighbour had found him not looking good in their garden and called RSPCA/similar who picked him up. I can't remember if he died or was pts (this is all late 80s before chipping was a thing). Another neighbour mentioned when I knocked that they had seen a cat be taken away and we called the place who took him. Sadly it was too late, he'd passed (he was an older chap). He too had kidney failure and it had been very hot. We had no idea he was poorly at all. No warning. He was a happy cat who laid on my bed every night.

He'd also been cremated already so we never got to say goodbye or bring him home. I still think about him. I am so very sorry for your loss. There is nothing you could of done because you just didn't know. I'd be both really upset at his loss but also furious with neighbour who stole the opportunity for you to say your goodbyes. Unless you live miles apart a quick call and popping him in a box to bring him home to you would of been the right thing to do.

Totally understand why you feel the way you do. You have not been neglectful of a cat that had meandered off for a normal cat day out and took unwell. I appreciate the neighbour got him vetinary help but given they did know he was yours and how to get hold of you, they totally would of been right if they didn't know who's cat he was or if they had concerns that you'd not seek help for him but nothing in your post suggests that.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

Agreed.

You didn’t even move heaven and earth to be there when he was pts- unforgivable

It’s very annoying that they’ve been feeding him, but at least he was taken to the vets to be cared for. It could have happened in a different place where he wasn’t found and left to suffer.

Have a look at the timings - she didn't find out until 11:48 in a text, then spoke to the neighbour. OP was 2 hours away and the vets closed at 12 noon. Even if she could fly, it would have been impossible.