Neighbour fed my cat and took him to the vet

[Tigeresslearns]

I know I'm talking to the sensible here.
I've recently had to have my lovely boy pts. He was a roaming rascal that had to have his tail removed previously. He was also a lazy groomer so needed me to bath him on occasion too - not fun for him or me! But he was ours and was loved.

Anyway, I got a text a couple of weeks ago from a neighbour, who even after repeated telling by me to NOT feed him, had done so for a couple of years. He spent some time sat in her garden enjoying the sun. She knew I was his owner. She had my contact number and knows where I live.

She'd decided to take him to a vet as he had been unwell in her garden for 24 hours. She hadn't contacted me before this at all to tell me as I would of gone straight there to get him.

I called the vets, they'd done bloods and he was in kidney failure so I made the sad decision to pts. I couldn't get there before they would close for the day so I wasn't even there to give him strokes and love.

Adding to this, at the weekend I came across a fb post from the vets that they'd posted at the time, stating they had him and to call them as he was unwell. Comments underneath included some very strange or hurtful comments, including someone sharing my address and that I had 'abandoned' him. Thankfully the vets removed the post straight away when I called them.

Who the hell does this?

Things I've learnt:

Check your cat's chip is registered - my boy had been chipped years ago but for some reason the vet I'd used hadn't completed the registration or told me I had to complete the registration. It's been a pain but I've now got my other cats registered to me so it doesn't happen again.

Do not feed cats that don't belong to you. There are so many other means to care for a cat who you think it lost/abandoned/unwell. Posting on local fb groups get cats reunited really quickly usually. Or if you know the owner, tell them their cat is at yours. Any responsible cat owner would appreciate that.

On the face of it your neighbour shouldnt have took the cat to the vet without telling you.m But sounds like the neighbour thought the cat was being neglected and was unwell and wanted to make absolutely sure the cat was seen by a vet.

Our practice checks at annual vaccinations chip still working

Maybe she didn't contact you because she didn't trust you to take the cat to the vet.

She should have contacted you first before taking the cat to the vet.

Id be thankful that my cat was cared for when he needed it. I'd also get to the vets as soon as possible to be there with him and possibly bring him home to be put to sleep which we've done with all our animals. I am sure she had the cats best interests at heart and if I thought an animal was being neglected I'd do the same.

No, her neighbour did not tell a cat's owner it was unwell so the neighbour could take their cat to the vet. You don't take someone else's cat to the vet.

Ime people post all kinds of nuts things on FB re:cats. Things like, this cat walks past my house every day, is it okay? I saw this cat sitting on a wall on X Street so I've taken it some food. I mean really bonkers stuff. Some people who don't have cats seem to have very little understanding of their behaviour, that they are opportunists but essentially leave them be, 999 times out a 1000 they will have a home nearby.

I'm sorry about your cat OP. Obviously the neighbour should have contacted you, but for whatever reason didn't.

Even properly chipped wouldnt have stopped her.

So sorry for your loss

From your neighbours perspective, she could probably see him losing weight and deteriorating over time when you didn’t notice. What conversations had you been having over the years? If you treated her with contempt then is it a surprise she didn’t talk to you? Wouldn’t you have just accused her of interfering honestly?

I can’t see how old he was indicated in your messages but sounds like he wasn’t a young cat, how often was he going to the vets? Hadn’t they ever recommended blood tests?

I’m sorry for your loss but I would be grateful that the neighbour took him as he’d have been in a lot of pain

100% this… so sorry for your loss x

I’m so sorry for your loss.

The neighbour definitely should have contacted you. Also, cats are very good at hiding their pain and so it’s easy to miss symptoms (I’ve been there). Be kind to yourself - I bet your cat had a lovely life with you.

Oh, OP, am sorry this happened. While I can't fault really the neighbour taking the cat to the vet (it came from a good place), kidney failure is a long progressive disease. I have a cat now with it thanks to being overdosed by the vet when she was very young. Unless your cat was really showing signs of end of life or suffering greatly, he probably could've hung on until you were home.

Sadly, had even if you'd known about the FKD, with your neighbour feeding your cat anyway, you'd not have been able to slow it though food or food additives. I would, when things are calmer, remind her of that when it comes to feeding other peoples cats.

Which brings me onto - friend is a rescuer for CP. No, you don't feed cats without also asking for help. If a cat looks lost, skinny, stray, feed them while putting on social media, trying a paper collar as it can create trust. If the cat is on a waiting list for rescue it can also keep them in an area ready for trapping when the space comes up. So, feeding does have a place but not without actually doing the rest of it.

Edited to add - people need to realise that most vets just chip and hand owner paperwork. Owners are the ones who then need to register the number and pay the money. This isn't really a vets job anymore.

I’m not even a fan of cats but I think your neighbour was bang out of order. Why not contact you the evening she noticed he was unwell, of the following morning, or before taking him to the vets. She is odd, and frankly I’d have nothing to do with her going forward.

I think this is a really horrible response you’re getting too. I’m sorry OP for the loss of your pet 💐

Acute kidney failure can be pretty quick.

Lets be honest, given that others thought you had abandoned him and your neighbour took him to the vets, they clearly believe he wasn't cared for. My parent's neighbour recently gave her cat away because the cat enjoyed going from garden to garden and spending time wth others, beyond cruel. Some people need to realise the cat knows where its better off!

Exactly.

My previous Boycat went from having a perfect bill of health to PTS within 9 months with CKD (6 months from first symptoms), doesn't always take years to progress. And to be honest there are so many poisons about that cause almost instant kidney failure that you can't assume a cat has had CKD for ages without it being noticed. Common examples are lilies, anti-freeze and rat poison, all things a cat can come across easily on their travels.

OP has said the cat had been eating and drinking normally up until the incident, and that he often went out overnight with their paths not crossing in the morning, so she wouldn't have had any reason to suspect there was a problem.

If the neighbours was genuinely concerned that the cat wasn't being cared for in general before then, despite having had a number of talks with the OP who I'm sure had explained about the coat problems, that may have been the time to act not to wait until the cat is unwell.

Some of these comments are weird, you're right to be annoyed. In her situation any reasonable person would have called you, even if I thought it was an emergancy and felt I needed to take cat to vets immediately, I'd have been calling you om my way out the door to let you know... given they have a history of feeding cat against your express wishes, do you think she may have given them something that accidently made them unwell and was trying to cover it?

For all those harping on about CKD, OP said kidney failure, not CKD. There are many reasons cats can go into kidney failure including poisoning which causes acute renal failure, not chronic, although it can develop into chronic later. Or tumours, which can grow rapidly. In older cats, if their heart is also compromised, they can deteriorate very quickly. Especially in hot
weather. In older cats, it is not always in their interests to use fluids and keep intervening trying to keep them alive.

I had an elderly cat who went from dragging live magpies through the catflap to dying within a few days from kidney failure. He had a lifelong heart condition, which could not compensate once his kidneys started to fail. In the last 48 hours of his life, when I already had a PTS appointment booked, he wandered off to a nearby street, all of about 50m from home via the gardens. I hunted and hunted for him before finding a FB post. They found him in their garde and were taking him to the RSPCA as a supposed cruelty case. The owner (me, a vet) was being called all sorts of names, accusations were being made.

If the neighbour had the OP’s number, she should have rung it.

We lost a cat a few years ago to kidney failure and it came on SO fast. She was a house cat and we noticed she was sleeping a bit more, and not eating as much (but still eating something) and so we made an appointment at the vets for the Monday - Saturday night I went to bed (daughter was small at the time and poorly so she was in the bed with me, hubby stayed downstairs) and hubby came up at 2am to say she had gone downhill and he was taking her to the vets there and then (he had already rung them). Less than half an hour later she had been PTS, it really was that fast. She also had asthma so maybe she was just a sickly cat to start with and the kidney failure combined with that just was too much for her, I suppose we will never know.

OP there will always be someone on here telling you that you should have done this, why didn't you do that? You typed something else, that's not what you said before, etc etc, and the amount of people who haven't read the post before commenting is ridiculous. The fact is, it's happened, you've come on here to talk about it on - a CHAT FORUM - and suddenly you're the worst cat owner in the world. I keep my cat in because of there are too many dangers out there, but I have had cats in the past that were outdoor cats and they would regularly disappear for a day (particularly if the weather was nice and people were feeding them! A hungry cat will come home! I wouldn't dream of feeding someone else's cat, they could have medical problems and they will just keep coming back! Equally, if I found my neighbours cat in my garden clearly unwell I would be straight to their door letting them know! I don't know of anyone who has psychic connections to their cat so they know where they are at all times, do you?

Sorry that turned into a bit of a rant, I'm just so sick of seeing posts on here that are pulling people apart, forensically going through every word of any post they've ever done. Haven't any of you ever needed a chat with someone, just to clear things up in your own mind? Jeeez, have a day off

I'm a vet nurse and i am sorry for your loss too.
I do think you are slightly passing on the responsibility of your cats chip /lack of chip onto the vet .
Most vets/nurses will routinely scan a cat during annual vaccine / check up.
once in a blue moon a chip will work its way out or stop working , it makes sense to get them scanned annually for peace of mind.
It is a real pain for us when presented with a 'stray' animal with no chip ,an unregistered chip,or a chip contact detail not updated so many stray cats and dogs that have a home must get picked up and rehoused miles away with the owner never finding out what happened.
I kind of understand that your neighbour was worried and why she acted as she did, perhaps your little cat was looking worse than you thought he did.
I'm quite certain that even though you weren't there the vet and their team would have treated your cat with kindness and compassion.

Do you know MN rules on correcting other posters’ grammar ? Do you know you could be correcting those with learning disabilities. ? Keep your infuriation to yourself and concentrate on the subject about which OP has posted. Nobody thinks you’re clever.

Are the posters licking the neighbours arse just ignoring the fact neighbour noticed the cat was ill for a full day before doing anything about it then?

So sorry OP, it's bad enough losing a pet without being away from them when it happens. Your neighbour should definitely have contacted you much sooner and not just opted to let you know after the fact.
Giving her the benefit of te doubt I'm sure she meant well, and at least he didn't just crawl off and die with you never knowing <3