DCat run over and killed and I think it was me

[CatHugger]

I found DCat dead at the side of our very quiet road this afternoon. She never went far, just to the access road at the back of our garden. Looking at her tracker history, she went to that spot just as I left the house and didn't move after that until I found the body. I can't stop crying. It was a traumatic head injury and I don't think she suffered, but I can't believe I hit my sweet girl, didn't notice and left her dead by the side of the road. She was the cuddliest, most beautiful cat, only 8 months old. I've told DH I think it was me who hit her but we're not telling the kids. It's DD's birthday and she's devastated.

Ah, I’m so sorry. What rotten luck.

I am sorry for your loss. 😢

Oh that's hard. How awful. So sorry for your loss

I’m so so sorry. Things like this are just heartbreaking. Have a big cuddle from me

Oh my god that is awful I’m so sorry. You must Be absolutely traumatised. Be kind to yourself. Take a couple of paracetamol and go to bed (although nor easy with DD birthday) Sending hugs and flowers .

Thankyou. I'd go to bed but I think I'd just cry more. DD is cuddled up with me and DH on the sofa watching the original Ghostbusters film. I have a box of tissues and just have tears streaming down my face not to disturb the others. DS helped us lay DCat to rest in the garden earlier. DBoyCat has been uncharacteristically quiet but is sleeping now. DGirlCat was his little buddy. He gave her body a good sniff while I held her, so he knows she's gone.

I’m so sorry.

i think you would have noticed if you hit a cat though. I did hit and kill a cat once and there was a massive thud.

This is her. She used to go out first thing in the morning, do a perimeter patrol and then jump in bed with me and DH.

The access road is an unpaved dirt track so it's very bumpy anyway. Only 4 cars go down the track, all our neighbours, and none of them said anything about hitting or finding her.

So sorry to read of your loss OP. I’m so glad you thought to let her little playmate ‘see’ his sisters body though so he can hopefully understand what’s happened and not be stressing himself forever searching for her.

You sound like a good cat mom who gave her a good life whilst she was with you 🤍

I’m so sorry. My mum did this once, cat just heard her car coming back down the lane, through the gate and ran straight under a back wheel. Devastating.

I must say, I see so much vitriol about drivers when a cat is found dead, but honestly, these things can just happen to vigilant, caring drivers, often without them ever knowing.

@CatHugger So sorry for the loss of your beautiful cat. We lost a kitten about 18 months ago when he was hit by a car and left in the middle of the road - it is awful 😢

I’m sorry OP, try not to beat yourself up, you don’t know 100% if it was you and even if it was, it was an accident. I wouldn’t tell DD if I was in your position

Please be kind to yourself as it’s a terrible shock to lose a beloved pet so suddenly and it will take a while to process your loss. Our lovely cat was also killed recently by a car and it has devastated us but the vet reassured us that she wouldn’t have suffered at all. Your cat was obviously so well loved - please don’t make your pain worse by feeling guilty about anything. Unfortunately tragic accidents like this happen. In time you’ll be able to remember that she had a very happy life with you and your family.

@mydogisanidiottwhy on Earth would she take paracetamol? She's not in physical pain

Actually weeping and trying to control our weeping can give you a cracking headache. I find a paracetamol helps.

May be a sinus thing? Mine are narrow and twisty, I feel really swollen when I’m sad.

Yep, cracking headache and sore cheek muscles (are they a thing) from trying not to cry.

It’s an old fashioned thing my gran did except it was aspirin. Cup of tea, two Asprin and bed.

DBoyCat woke me up this morning with his usual miaowing for breakfast and I was ok until I realised that I only needed one bowl, one tracker, half the tin of food. He's come back up to our bedroom instead of disappearing to find his neighbourhood buddies. DC are still asleep.

We buried DGirlCat in her favourite spot in the garden last night. MIL gave us a lovely pink salvia last week so we've planted that on top. I'll look for some beautiful bulbs to plant as well.

Im so sorry for the loss of your little cat.
The tractive trackers we use definitely aren’t pinpoint accurate unless you put them into live mode so I don’t think you can know where exactly she went. This is just as likely to have been someone else, perhaps even someone who knew and moved her to the roadside 😨

Oh I'm so sorry.
please be compassionate with yourself

I managed not to cry at work today, so an improvement on yesterday. I've ordered a custom felt model of her for DD, who's distraught but being well supported by her friends and the school counsellor. I'll find it hard to forgive myself but I keep reminding myself that guilt won't bring her back and she was a gorgeous little kitten who I should remember for her sweet, funny personality and not the way she died.

@CatHugger
I really feel for you so much. It wasn’t your fault, it was a devastating accident. Be as kind to yourself as you are to your daughter. Take your time to grieve and hopefully eventually heal. Sending you a big big hug.