Help, I don’t think I can give up kitten :(

[Aug12]

Hi all,

8 weeks ago, our cat had 2 kittens unexpectedly (unplanned and she has been neutered since so please don’t judge)

Anyway, the plan was always for us to keep one and a family friend to have the other. I know this home is a good loving, forever home, but I’ve been heartbroken all day at the thought of breaking up the cat family here. Mummy cat is currently cuddled in with her babies and they are all purring so loudly, I don’t know how I can break them up.. financially we can afford to keep the 3, insurance, fees etc is no issue. We said our friend could have one as they were looking for an family pet and it seemed like a perfect solution.. do I just need to rip the plaster off quickly and send him off or will we regret this? We have young kids that are sad about kitten leaving but they equally have excited children with all the kitten supplies ready awaiting the arrival this weekend. I didn’t expect to feel like this as I know he is going to a lovely new home but it’s hit me like a tonne of bricks.. all advice welcome.

8 weeks is definitely too young and could lead to socialisation issues. There’s a reason the GCCF says 13 weeks minimum for their registered breeders to rehome.

I took my cat home at 8 weeks and he never got properly socialised. I so regret not asking for 2 more weeks with mum, but the friend of a friend giving them away wanted them gone as they were sick of multiple litter trays. As a result my cat still at age 9 thinks it's fun to 'play' with feet by ripping them to shreds. Much better to let them be raised a little longer by their mum.

@Solent123 Also because they can get their vaccines at 8-10 weeks, they shouldn't be rehomed without these.

I don't know what rescues people are using but the ones around here all do 16 weeks absolute minimum to re-home their kittens. Also allows for them to be spayed/neutered before going to their new homes, depending on weight it can be done at about 4 months.

Agree on what others said about kittens being rehomed as a pair - it's really important for their socialisation, play, keeping them busy when they have high energy, etc. If people want a solitary cat, then get an adult cat.

OP, don't ascribe human qualities to your cat. She'll be fine without her kittens but do wait til they've had all their vaccines and ideally fixed before rehoming, which will be another few weeks.

Give the kitten to your friend. Once the kittens are weaned mum probably won't be cuddly with them. I grew up with 4 generations of cats and none of them were particularly bothered about their offspring. They were just cats who lived in the same house.

Keep the kitten. Your friend can adopt another kitten. The shelters are overflowing with them.

Mummy cat will start to attack the kittens as they get older. When we bought ours, the mummy was hissing and “going for” the kittens and we had to take them straight away for their own wellbeing.

It would be really shit of you to go back on your agreement with your friend.

This is not always the case at all. Plenty of mother cats live in harmony with their adult offspring.

Whatever you decide OP, 8 weeks is too young.

PLEASE WAIT UNTIL 12 WEEKS.

I've had cats my whole life too and I think sticking to RSPCA and animal welfare advice is the right thing to do!!

This, 8 weeks is too ealry

That is a rescue where they have to go for bare minimum as they inundated.

there is time here for a better healthier seperation

No it's 8/9 weeks for dogs. 12 for cats.

Exactly this

The 12 week brigade are correct. There are lots of important things kittens learn from their mum.

I adopted an abandoned kitten once and because it was young it didn’t know she was supposed to bury her poo so was just pooing on top of the litter and in pot plants. We had her until she was 12 and died of cancer but she had severe emotional behavioural issues - loving cat but very moody and strange behaviour. I watched a programme about cats recently and they said when they find a lone kitten they have to find a litter for them because they can develop emotional problems if separated from other cats too young.

I kept two of my cats kittens when I was a teenager, two boys! They grew way bigger than her and even as adults she would stand back and let them eat all her food. One disappeared when he was a few years old and when the mummy cat eventually passed her remaining son was inconsolable- woke us up in the middle of the night every night to go out to the garage to look for her wailing his head off, he died a few months later. They don’t show affection the way humans do but they do love and grieve. I think 8 weeks is cruel.

I mean, I can't talk because we kept all four kittens 🙈 (took in a stray who turned out to be pregnant)

But if the only reason you want to keep them both is to not break up the family then I'd let it go to your friend. Ours all get on fine, but it's not the same as when they're tiny. They get on much the same as friends cats who love in a multi cat household

Keep both your kittens , your kittens are extra special to you and you will never get this opportunity again , your friend can get another kitten (or two) easily enough and will be just as special to her and her family

don’t feel guilty , there are loads of kittens out there looking for loving homes and you will be doing one (or two) of them a favour

your friends kids will be excited for getting a kitten, any kitten, but not especially your kitten ,

Please, please don’t get guilt tripped on here

2 kittens will play together it’s actually much easier

Keep the kitten. Sole kittens get lonely.

Keep them all together , friend can get a kitten from elsewhere easily

Very common for the mother to reject them once fully weaned. Let the kitten go. Everyone will be fine! 😊

What sex are they? Mother cats like to live in female-only groups. We made the mistake of keeping our cat's boy kitten and by 18 weeks she could not stand the sight of him. Unfortunately he got run over at 7 months, though I still say she lured him across the road in front of a van...

Also, there's this horror to think about: https://www.mumsnet.com/talk/the_litter_tray/5245860-cat-on-heat-and-male-kitten-help Is your house big enough to keep them separate until the boys can be 'done'?

That's interesting, mine was a boy kitten that mother rejected, it was so sad. He is bloody gorgeous now though, the best cat!

I wonder what the op did 🤔

^This!

We had a mummy cat when I was young and she got so fed up with her kittens that she took them several fields away and dumped them!!

They all found their way home. We had new homes lined up so we decided it was time!

Not sure about that!

I have three - 2 females that don't get on, plus a male (whom the first female also hates!)

I adopted the second and third from the same rescue and they said they wouldn't have rehomed another female to us and that a male was a better mix! The two of them adore each other thankfully!