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The litter tray

Join our community of cat lovers on the Mumsnet Cat forum for kitten advice and help with cat behaviour.

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Original poster

DS wants to take cat to uni

121 replies

ClusterFog · 19/06/2023 13:27

DS will be renting a student house from September with two uni friends.

He wants to take his cat with him, 4 hours away from our home.

Both friends are in full agreement with this plan. One has met the cat over Easter, the other will be visiting this summer. Both have grown up with family cats.

DS has had the cat for 5 years and they have a strong bond. Having the cat has really helped his sometimes fragile MH, such as during exams.

I'm a bit conflicted.

I'm told the law has changed and landlords can't refuse tenants pets, but don't know all the details.

Any advise/suggestions would be helpful, thank you.

OP posts:

buzzybea25 · 19/06/2023 14:39

Say no.
I also was very bonded and dependent on my cat for MH support when I went to uni. So I do get it. I also knew my cat was blissfully happy and pampered with my parents. I went home regularly for my cat fixes ( and washing , and proof reading purposes).
But it's not fair on the poor cat to take it off to a student house then bring back at holidays. Also it may get hurt in a new area.
Explain the cat will always be at home for him and he can come home for cat time/ support etc etc. Cats can always face time these days.

Megifer · 19/06/2023 14:40

Goodness no way! Not fair on puss and if anything happened to the cat (lost/ran over etc) I imagine DS would blame himself which wouldn't do his MH any good.

I'm dead serious, if he wants a little pet to help take his mind off stuff he should get a couple of gerbils! They are ace, I thought mine to spin and 'beg' for treats and could let one of them free roam from time to time. They purr too! 😍

TiaraBoo · 19/06/2023 14:41

I don’t think 4 hour journeys are fair on the cat. I’d say no. Aren’t terms 10 weeks long? He can come home in the middle so he’ll only go 5 weeks without the cat.

(my cat can’t even make it to the vets without throwing up and that’s less than 5 minutes away, and if I had her in the cat cage for 4 hours I think she’d kill me)

BoogiemanSam · 19/06/2023 14:44

Landlords must not unreasonably deny a written request for a pet, however unreasonably is a very ambiguous word.

In this case, if this is a new tenancy, it is reasonable to say that the landlord cannot judge what type of person your son is having not known him. The landlord does not know his ability to keep a pet, has no impartial references regarding pet keeping or a tenancy reference. It's reasonable to think most university digs are not appropriate for a pet due to schedules, cost of keeping them, parties etc.

Gorringe · 19/06/2023 14:51

You know your son best, why not try it and he may well come to the realisation himself that it’s a lot of responsibility.

If it’s an indoor cat my main concern would be how good would his housemates be at keeping windows and doors closed, could be a huge worry for him

Els1e · 19/06/2023 14:51

I think it depends on the cat. My cousins cat goes on caravan holidays with them and is fine. Takes everything in her stride. My cat would have been completely stressed out by a move like this. The area will be unfamiliar to the cat, so there is a higher chance of the cat going missing. Not sure if the pet rule applies to temporary student accommodation.

AuntieJune · 19/06/2023 14:56

Your son is thinking of his own best interests, not those of the cat.

Smartiepants79 · 19/06/2023 14:57

This is an utterly bonkers idea. I can’t believe anyone is even contemplating it.
let your poor cat stay at home where is belongs.
I’m not quite sure of the legalities either but I’d expect any average student landlord to be deeply unhappy at this.

EyelessArseFace · 19/06/2023 15:01

With all due regard to your dc's MH, the welfare of an animal has to come first here.

gogohmm · 19/06/2023 15:05

Depends a lot on the cat, some would be traumatised by moving, then inevitably moving again. My ddog did go with dd for 6 months (covid times) but dogs are very different

Iloveanicegarden · 19/06/2023 15:38

We had a cat that was well travelled but to say he enjoyed it??? Nah. He was well attached to our main home and adapted well to his temporary home but the bits in between to get him from A to B were traumatic for all concerned.

OrderOfTheKookaburra · 19/06/2023 15:44

You mention a garden, which means the cat goes outside.

If it had been an indoor cat I think it would have been fine. With an outdoor cat house moves become more problematic. It takes cats a lot longer to become adjusted to a new outdoor area, especially if they have less space. It can be done, but for the first few weeks the cat has to be kept indoors, until they settle in. If the cat gets out they could get lost or even try to get "home".

The holidays are more problematic as if he comes home it would once again be disruptive for the cat, both coming home and then returning to Uni.

You know your DS though. And if the cat is more bonded to him then a move could be done.

Numberunknown · 19/06/2023 15:47

It might be a good idea to check first with the letting agent / landlord , some landlords still do refuse pets , sometimes because of insurance , sometimes because the property has a restrictive covenant

Finlesswonder · 19/06/2023 15:50

Yeah he's a sober and responsible kid now. Flash forward 4 months and your darling cat is cowering under a bed in a dirty party house because your son is "discovering" himself.
There's a time and a place for pets, the student years aren't one of them.
DS is already going to live with 2 friends, is he just recreating his home life?

IamRoyFuckingKent · 19/06/2023 15:52

I wish wish wish my dd could take her cat to uni with her but she accepts that she can't. In your case though it does sound feasible. Why not ask the landlord and if it's a no that is the end of it. If the landlord says yes then it's another conversation.

TulipofUtrecht · 19/06/2023 15:58

Yeah let him take his cat! It'll be good for both of them, he sounds like a sensible adult and responsible cat owner. The cat will get used to it and will know it's ok with him thanks to their strong bond.

Someoneonlyyouknow · 19/06/2023 16:01

An indoor cat requires everyone in the house (including visitors) to keep doors and windows closes. An outdoor cat (and you mentioned the garden) still needs means to get in and out (for food and security). The landlord may not agree to a catflap being fitted. And, as others have said, transporting a cat 4 hours drive 6 times a year is unkind and stressful for most cats

FlounderingFruitcake · 19/06/2023 16:02

I had the cat in my student flat! It had a big enclosed balcony for him, litter tray was in the cupboard in the hallway. I’d just call my mum to pay the vet which was only needed for his annual check up since he was young and indoors. We had friends in the building who would look in on him if we were away overnight but any longer and he’d go in the carrier on the train to my parents which he was completely fine with.

jannier · 19/06/2023 16:07

Is he not planning to be home for Christmas then again easter

Stickytreacle · 19/06/2023 16:10

It would be an absolute no from me, it is a chance for your son to become an independent individual, off exploring and discovering himself. Having to care for a cat will mean he may lose out on opportunities, or the cat will be neglected.

Strangers may visit who aren't always kind to animals, you just don't know what might go on. Plus travelling such long distances on a regular basis is completely unfair for the cat.

There is no way my kids would have been allowed to take any of ours to uni, and I am pleased that they put their cats welfare above their own and would never have asked. Time for your son to grow up and realise that an animal has its own right to stay in the home it knows and loves.

pinkflute · 19/06/2023 16:13

I'd say absolutely not. Not fair on the cat. Plus your DS needs to be free of constraints to immerse in the student life.

TerfIngOnTheBeach · 19/06/2023 16:16

As above. Absolutely not, very unfair to the cat, unless the cat is currently a house cat I would consider it cruel even to uproot it and move it between homes on a regular basis. In fact it’s cruel anyway.

how about you get in touch with a cat charity and ask their opinion since they understand cat behaviours better than most.

reddingweddy · 19/06/2023 16:20

The mere thought of a 4 hour journey with a cat would be enough to produce a hard No from me.

Messyhair321 · 19/06/2023 16:20

personally (long term cat owner) it depends on the cat, mine would absolutely hate it, but I used to have a neighbour who took her cat everywhere she went, weekend stays away etc and the cat was fine, quite liked it.
So if the cat will cope with the change, (make sure it all smells the same if possible!) it should be fine

tribpot · 19/06/2023 16:21

This definitely feels very unfair to the cat. What if he goes away for the weekend? Or on a field trip? And then as others have said, transporting the cat home at the end of each term, then re-acclimatising it to a new territory. Imagine if anything happened to the cat as well.

Our cat would, I'm pretty sure, be quite happy if we buggered off (as long as whoever moved in kept her in the manner to which she has become accustomed).

I would think it is fairly likely the landlord is not going to allow a cat anyway, so my suggestion would be to DS that he leaves the cat at home for the first 4-6 weeks, see how he gets on and how the cat gets on, and then make a decision when he knows a bit more about what things are going to be like.

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