To be really unsure about how to handle our old dog's habits and maintain our home ..

[Nameisnewforthis]

Our dog is 15 . The vet says she is blind and deaf and has some signs of dementia possibly- but it is haed to tell because she can be lost in the house due to sight nit confusion .
the vet says that she believes dogs with lack if sight etc can still have a good quality of life as they can enjoy being near loved ones , feel the warmth of the sun . She for sure enjoyed sleeping next to me on her back next ro me this afternoon .

for some months now she mostly sleeps in the day - has a lively teatime period . She wees a lot in the night now so she can no lomger sleep with us - she sleeps in the hall which means s lined worh puppy pads as she cannot last all night now and we also suspect by the amount of pad use she is active at night .
She mostky goes out in the garden or short walks . We actively toilet her take hee into yeh garden many times a day .

The problem is she has started wee in the house ( for some weeks now - this can be f5 mins after she has been out !
we dont know if its linked to sight.
she does not have any urine problems - the vet has checked .

Despite our efforts - the kitchen dinner smells of wee. People say they cant smell it but you can .
my friend said she couldnt. Stand this as it would make her feel dirty. She wd pts .

my dh said yesterday he had enough.
I siad but she is a happy old dog .
she enjous her food , she likes to me with me . She dozes. But our rugs are ruined ( wool ) and our kitchen feels awful despite cleaning .
its getting dh down .
I feel bu whatever I do .

Only you know when it’s time to say goodbye to a beloved pet. If she’s eating and drinking, not in pain or distress then keep going.

Meanwhile, continue to be practical. Remove all rugs so the floor can be easily cleaned. Use throws on sofas so any smell of wee on her coat doesn’t get to the sofa fabric. Then wash her bedding etc in biological washing powder at 40 degrees. Any hotter destroys the enzymes. Use biological powder to clean the floor also - this removes any smell.

The last few weeks and months with your dog are very precious, so find opportunities to spend nice times with her. These memories are a great comfort afterwards.

I have a similar question mark over my cat. It’s not her time yet but the toileting is a big issue. No advice OP as I wouldn’t know what to do, but sympathy.

Dm has similar issues with her old boy, was wetting in the night, very old rescue so no idea how old) signs of doggy dementia, sight loss and now deaf.

BUT he's happy wagging his tail, loves his food and still likes a play with his toys and a local walk, dm has tried various issues at night ( she was letting him out every 2 hours on a lead ( he didn't hear her call him back).

She's now got pen with his bed in it and he goes in there at night, she put a kylie/ brolly sheet over his bed he wet it once on the 1st or 2nd night but not since and he's back to sleeping through - she wakes him in the morning.

the vet said she just about has some quality of life

If a vet said that to me about any of my animals I would know it was time to say goodbye.

What kind of a life is it for her if she can't see, can't hear, toilets inside and where she sleeps?

My old dog had the same but with poo, which was probably easier to manage than what you are dealing with. It isn't linked to his sight problem as he'll know the way out without seeing. It's just his age, poor boy. My mind was made up for me as he woke up one day unable to stand, but I am so glad I made his last weeks so filled with love. I couldn't have put him to sleep for my convenience, while he enjoyed a little walk, lying in the sun, being with us and scarfing his food, and not in pain. But you know your dog better than anyone.

For those who suggested dog nappies do you take them off wjen they go outside ? I was thinking about encouraging nrormal wee outside . We caant use at night as she also poos .
good isea ee camera - am aware ahe must be awake quite a but at night with tje volume of poo and weee there iis .

I'd call it time now. We let our old dog go on a few months too long and I feel we him down. Dogs are stoic, so you may not realise how advanced things have become x

How active is she? Can she still go for proper walks? She may not be emptying her bladder on just a quick trip to the garden.
My dog is almost 15, pretty deaf and has cataracts so doesn't see well. But dogs rely on smell more than sight and he has no problem finding his way around the house and he goes for his normal walks (though gets tired in the heat). I have noticed he pees more in between walks in the garden but so far not in the house.
The activity at night may be anxiety as she's no longer with you. If she can, go for proper walks and see of this helps with the toileting. Talk to your vet about what he thinks her real quality of life is - a dog normally would not like to soil their home and that in itself may cause stress.

She has nwver been a fan of big walks - but she used to run down the village worh me to go to the pub .
she no lomge r wants to go that far .
she has nwvr been an active walker as she is a lap dog breed- what we do is let her ‘ walk herself’ with her nose - so she pick s up yhe local dog news.
sometimes she loves it . Sometimes she does not . And can plant herself.The most common wals are
we carey her to a spot she loves - then she trots home
she walks to her fave sniff area - she can spend 20 mins just sniffing quite happily. We take the cue from her . I agree
sge does not have much exercise - this is more pottering at her speed . So yes - this may be part of it .

@Nameisnewforthis older female dogs can develop pee issues. Ours has some medication from the vet, we have also bought some reusable dog nappies from Amazon. They are great, just treat them like children's reusable nappies

This is her chilling next to me .❤️
dh says that “ her life is mostly only worth living when she is with me “
it is true that her body language is different when not to me .

Oh OP, I was in your shoes a few months ago. Blind, deaf, incontinent 14 year old. I too was paralysed by the guilt that I would be having him put down for my own convenience, and worrying about my guilt stopped me from seeing the real suffering he was going through, and stopped me from comparing the dog in front of me with the dog he had been when he still enjoyed life. He’d always slept with me and now he didn’t. His bed was often soiled by the morning which meant he’d been sleeping in it (even though he was wearing washable nappies: they are not a foolproof solution and mean baths every morning). He was really insecure because he didn’t know where he was. He was only happy beside me because then he felt safe, but he couldn’t be beside me 24/7, nor would that have been a happy or healthy way for him to live. He lost so much of what had made him happy throughout his life. This will only get worse as her little oases of contentment are further eroded. Enjoyment of food is no indicator of enjoyment of life. In fact, I think it becomes their one tiny bright spot in a long, sad day. Start bracing yourself and thinking of letting her go, for her sake. 💐

Levisticum thank you .
she has weed plus x2 poos in the house again this eve. Despite being taken out . After a lovely day of snoozing next to me . But i cant keep staying in with her all
the time .
She seems to accept it when i am going out or to bed tho she either gets in her bed in the hall or sleeps on the landing nearby and then goes down to the bed in the hall during the night.
my dh said he has had enough again . Its the wee that really gets to him .
we have neutralised and cleaned again .

i have discussed nappies with him - i didnt know you had to bath each am - she would hate that .

i am listening but i am also struggling to understand that she isn’t enjoying life as she goes wild for treats, enjoys sniffs if not walks and snoozes next to me . Am i in denial or something ? I mean it .. and thank you .

Kayjay2018 thanks - re the nappies did tou have to bath your dog when using them ? Our dog wd hate that . Also did you take them off for garden wees - i dont want her to lose what little skill she has to still do that ( when the timming is right)

i am listening but i am also struggling to understand that she isn’t enjoying life as she goes wild for treats, enjoys sniffs if not walks and snoozes next to me . Am i in denial or something ? I mean it .. and thank you .

She can't hear, she can't see and she can't hold her bladder or bowels.

Think about what her life was like a year or two ago compared to now.

She also can’t understand. Human elderly adults have the cognitive awareness to know why they’re slowing down and can’t do some things - and adjust accordingly to find different ways to find pleasure in life.
You dog can’t do that. Imagine how small her world has become now. I’m so sorry, you clearly love her so much.

It is so hard and the worst part about having a pet.

I just think of what they're like in their prime and would they really want to exist in a world of darkness and silence while they toilet by their beds.

It's heartbreaking for us but we owe it to them to let them go while they still have their dignity. I wouldn't want to leave it until they give me no choice, if that makes sense (emergencies and accidents aside).

I know this isn't easy OP.

I have yet to come across a vet that comes out with the words "I think it's time". I am no vet but have and have had many animals. I have had two pts and both times the vets made ambiguous comments about if its time. They cannot make the decision for you. There is usually some treatment for every symptom and if you are willing to try this, then they will go with what you decide.

I knew when one of mine could not control his toileting, that it was time. I could tell he was ashamed about what he had done, obviously for me I knew he didn't do it on purpose. He had other problems too, it was not just the toileting accidents, but this was when I knew I had to consider what was best for him.

I know it is an impossibly difficult decision. But I felt I had made the right choice as we set a date (for a week later) and for the whole week we got to spend saying our goodbyes and spoiling him.

Although it was difficult, myself and the dc were able to process the grief slightly better than our last ddog who just passed away suddenly. We had the shock and the grief and the fact we did not get to say goodbye to her. Either way it is not easy though.

Oh OP you're not ready to say goodbye, you can't PtS because it's an inconvenience I agree. But it won't be long now before she is ready and you are watching and beginning to contemplate and that's fine. It doesn't sound like you are being at all selfish.

@Nameisnewforthis our girl is only pee incontinent, so we haven't been bathing her. She has no nappy on when outside at all (have forgotten to remove it a few times and had to chase her before she pees outdoors). She seems fine with them on and seems less likely to drip or pee with them on weirdly.

Sorry if you have already said, is she on any pee medication and have the vets checked out her back end for arthritis or any pain?

I don’t like how people keep using the word inconvenience.

Nobody here has suggested putting a dog down because cleaning up pee/poo is inconvenient, but the reality is that dogs don’t like to toilet near their beds and a dog who has lost the ability to hold/control themselves is (in most cases) a dog who is, sadly, coming to the end.

I also think there’s a difference between an incontinent dog who can still see and hear, and an incontinent dog who basically has no means of communication whatsoever anymore.

You wont believe this , but when I went to see her this am she was shaking . The vet came at 11 30. She had rapidly developed a severe eye ulcer . She was in pain . This is her 3rd eye ulcer and the vet said there must be an underlying issue. She would need surgery.- but that she may het a further one. I asked re pain relief .
vet said we could have the next 48 hours with her but the sooner the better as she coiuld not guarentee she would not be in some pain .
I asked who is that time for us or her and vet said us .

so - in the comfort of her home ( after calming from the vet examination as she had to be muzzled) - I gave her her best and banned treat - chocolate- and she slipped away .

@Nameisnewforthis I am so very sorry for your loss 💐

It was very clear from your posts how much you loved her and how you were trying your very best to put her needs first.

It does sound like she had a quality of life up until the very end and ultimately you did the hardest but the best thing for your lovely girl.

I'm so sorry

Oh I’m so sorry x