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The doghouse

If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

Original poster

Dog bit DP :(

121 replies

Dogbitdp · 16/09/2023 09:04

Am upset but DP seems to be overreacting. PTS not going to happen so just wanted a bit of advice from anyone who's been in a similar situation.

Dog was in the garden last night pissing about probably trying to eat cat shit etc. He said she wouldn't come in, so he went to grab her from behind and she turned and snapped/bit him on the hand 😔 skin broken, about 3 puncture wounds but its not as bad as it could have been.

I was a bit shocked when he told me this morning but not hugely surprised- she sometimes hurts her leg as she loves to run, and she was moping a bit yesterday, but the main issue she has currently is a cyst type thing that keeps filling up and swelling, then it will go. It must be painful when it does that as she does have a go at it, and I noticed yesterday it had flared up again. Vet keeps saying that he wouldn't recommend removing it until it really causes problems (think we're there now!)

He said hes not sure about her now but his main concern seems to be that "I've never been bit by one of MY dogs before". He is generally arrogant anyway tbh so im certain his pride is hurt more.

I get it, I'd be upset, but I don't think he's considering that there were about 4 factors at play- it was dark, he approached her from behind so surprised her, and her leg and/or this cyst was probably hurting (cyst is right where your hand would be if you were to grab her from behind).

Hes now said if she does it again she's dead. Doesnt care if there's a reason for it. When I said ill get her checked out and push now to have this thing removed he just shrugged.

Hes also a bit of a drama queen anyway and does exaggerate, but as I say he is very much "im right everyone else is wrong". I'm actually really worried now the next time she so much as barks he might exaggerate....I'm not even sure hes not exaggerating now about how it happened 😔

Shes never done this before or showed any signs of aggression at all. We do have two teen DC, one of whom has a real strong bond with her. She's so gentle and loving, I feel really bad for her tbh.

So vet next week but in the meantime I'll be on edge whenever dp is left alone with her. He loves her but tbh not as much as our last dog. Suspect this is because our last dog was very much 'his', whereas our current dog is definitely more aligned to me (used to be funny but inside I do think that gets to him).

OP posts:
Knowivedonewrong · 16/09/2023 10:55

He will need medical attention, especially a Tetnaus jab. Possibly antibiotics too. I did when bitten by a resource guarding WCS.
( yes! It's was my fault I got bitten,) your husband is at fault here too.

CosyCoffee · 16/09/2023 10:56

BygoneDays · 16/09/2023 10:46

I think better training is required. I would use a carrot and stick approach.
your dog might need some more training too.

Edited

😂

Foggyfoggyfoggy · 16/09/2023 11:06

My afore mentioned rotty got the 'blame' from my ex a lot. In the way. Too big.. Too loud-she wasn't at all after my training input.. Too hairy.. He began to just sulk in general about her tbh. Seemingly jealous I figured.. I ditched the dh and had ddog for another 8 years! Def improved my life op! Can recommend it op!

Hanlonsamazer · 16/09/2023 11:16

ClusterFukt · 16/09/2023 09:50

If I was grabbed from behind in the dark I’d probably bite the cunt that did it too.
I’d PTS DP and keep lovely dog.

Took the words out of my mouth. Keep the dog, rehome the Bloke. Sounds like a prick.

CantThinkOfANameAtAll · 16/09/2023 11:16

I know you are upset about the whole situation but you ignored my question. Is he as unkind and uncaring with your children as he is with the dog? I always think that if a person is unkind to an animal it doesn't take much for them to be unkind to a human. He knows she's in pain in that area but doesn't care, and that, to me, shows he is not a good person at all. But you live with him so what have you observed?

RedHelenB · 16/09/2023 11:24

Dotcheck · 16/09/2023 09:39

She was in pain and was startled. Of course she bit.

He'd been calling her so I dint think she was necessarily startled, just didn't want to go inside.

SunflowersAndSmellyTrainers · 16/09/2023 11:30

I've come on to comment purely that if there's puncture wounds then your DH certainly needs antibiotics and perhaps a tetanus shot too.

Dog to vet - certainly a reaction to pain poor thing.

Sending love.

ZebraD · 16/09/2023 11:38

I actually think it’s quite harsh that you all find it acceptable for a dog to bite and puncture. You are basing your opinions on the personality of her partner not on whether a dog should bite. The dog knew he was there as he was trying to get the dog in. The dog was refusing and even when attempting to grab the dog to get it in, it refused by biting! It’s wrong and you shouldn’t be justifying it in any way because it was from behind or your partner is a dick. Dogs shouldn’t bite! Piercing skin is not a warning. Mouthing is a warning. Get the dog seen to with its cyst and re-assess. Ask the vet about the bite while you’re at it.

WetBandits · 16/09/2023 11:49

ZebraD · 16/09/2023 11:38

I actually think it’s quite harsh that you all find it acceptable for a dog to bite and puncture. You are basing your opinions on the personality of her partner not on whether a dog should bite. The dog knew he was there as he was trying to get the dog in. The dog was refusing and even when attempting to grab the dog to get it in, it refused by biting! It’s wrong and you shouldn’t be justifying it in any way because it was from behind or your partner is a dick. Dogs shouldn’t bite! Piercing skin is not a warning. Mouthing is a warning. Get the dog seen to with its cyst and re-assess. Ask the vet about the bite while you’re at it.

So if someone grabbed you where they knew you were already sore, you would just let them do it with no reaction? Of course you wouldn’t. A dog has even more defence to bite in this situation because they are incapable of rationalising that they shouldn’t bite. The OP’s poor dog just wanted the pain to go away so she bit what was hurting her.

andrainwillmaketheflowersgrow · 16/09/2023 11:55

ZebraD · 16/09/2023 11:38

I actually think it’s quite harsh that you all find it acceptable for a dog to bite and puncture. You are basing your opinions on the personality of her partner not on whether a dog should bite. The dog knew he was there as he was trying to get the dog in. The dog was refusing and even when attempting to grab the dog to get it in, it refused by biting! It’s wrong and you shouldn’t be justifying it in any way because it was from behind or your partner is a dick. Dogs shouldn’t bite! Piercing skin is not a warning. Mouthing is a warning. Get the dog seen to with its cyst and re-assess. Ask the vet about the bite while you’re at it.

If you were in pain and someone grabbed you from behind on your sore spot, how would you react?

steppemum · 16/09/2023 12:04

ZebraD as others have siad it is less the dark and startle and more the sore spot.

My old dog was the gentlest sweetest daft spaniel. But once when he had hurt himself I touched the sore spot and he air snapped at me. Air snap because I can't imagine him doing anything else. But it was very out of character and made me get him to the vet. Turns out he was very ill.

Prescottdanni123 · 16/09/2023 12:06

@LifeInTheUK

If someone snuck up behind me, surprised me and grabbed me when I was already in pain, you can bet your arse I would lash out. It doesn't mean I am a dangerous person. Likewise, this incident doesn't make OP's dog dangerous.

The aggression continuing is a bridge to be crossed when OP gets to it. Although if aggression is only aimed at the DP, I would start wondering if there had been other incidents when he hadn't treat the dog nicely behind my back.

LifeInTheUK · 16/09/2023 12:15

@Prescottdanni123 read my following post that will clarify further.

LaurieFairyCake · 16/09/2023 12:20

Lose the boyfriend as I'm suspicious he didn't say at the time - sounds like he was frustrated and grabbed her HARD

Keep the dog

Loafie · 16/09/2023 12:35

I'd get rid (of him, not her - he sounds dreadful!).

Floralnomad · 16/09/2023 12:39

@LifeInTheUK and how easy do you think it would be to rehome a middle aged dog with a bite history . In this instance it is not the dogs fault it is the humans fault and the OP would probably be better off just rehoming him .

Original poster
Dogbitdp · 16/09/2023 13:09

BygoneDays · 16/09/2023 10:46

I think better training is required. I would use a carrot and stick approach.
your dog might need some more training too.

Edited

😬

Just had a better look at it and give it a another clean, he hadn't cleaned all the dried blood off his fingers this morning so it looked worse than it is. 2 very small shallow punctures and one sort of but barely. Looks like ddog snapped at one finger. No crushing of hand, no hand nearly bitten off. He said he grabbed her and pulled her back and she growled, he didn't let go and carried on pulling (wtf!!), so she bit him.

He said she was worried she was eating fox poo and would be ill, which I sort of get if he was panicking as she does have a really sensitive stomach....but i said no, you don't grab her, especially if shed already growled (I've never known her to growl so this is strange, but she was a pissed off dog) either distract her with a treat or just leave her, she's eaten worse, and we'll have to scan the garden more regularly for forbidden treats and remove them.

Hes adamant hes not going to minor injuries or anywhere like that, I can't force him but ill keep an eye on him. He's utd with tetanus, he had one a couple of years ago, can't recall what for though.

I did catch him before talking to her saying hes not her friend, in a nice tone though tbf (hard to explain), ddog just looking at me like 🤔 so hes calmed down. But this is exhausting, the drama, the exaggeration, then he gets over himself. Fucking tedious.

OP posts:
Original poster
Dogbitdp · 16/09/2023 13:14

CantThinkOfANameAtAll · 16/09/2023 11:16

I know you are upset about the whole situation but you ignored my question. Is he as unkind and uncaring with your children as he is with the dog? I always think that if a person is unkind to an animal it doesn't take much for them to be unkind to a human. He knows she's in pain in that area but doesn't care, and that, to me, shows he is not a good person at all. But you live with him so what have you observed?

Oh sorry, no hes fine with the kids, nothing at all concerns me there. Hes a bit of a misery at times e.g. Will moan if one of them wants to go in the garden at 7pm whereas I'm quite laid back and usually tell him to unclench but nothing worrying.

OP posts:
andrainwillmaketheflowersgrow · 16/09/2023 13:33

He said he grabbed her and pulled her back and she growled, he didn't let go and carried on pulling (wtf!!), so she bit him.

He's an idiot.

Highdaysandholidays1 · 16/09/2023 13:49

Again, usually I am on the side of the owners but on this one, your husband manhandled an in pain dog, that growled and bit, nothing they have done before. I think he's lucky it was more of a snap than something deeper, but he absolutely can't be physically moving about the dog, especially when they are in pain.

MariePaperRoses · 16/09/2023 13:58

I hat name is the microchip in?

Make sure you are the registered owner so that only you and not him can make decisions about the dog.

Original poster
Dogbitdp · 16/09/2023 14:18

MariePaperRoses · 16/09/2023 13:58

I hat name is the microchip in?

Make sure you are the registered owner so that only you and not him can make decisions about the dog.

Yes its in my name and shes registered under me at the vets. Tbh I genuinely can't see DP having the absolute balls to do anything like PTS behind my back. He knows me well enough to understand that we'd be over the second he stepped in the vets even if he didn't go ahead with it.

OP posts:
6monthspost · 16/09/2023 14:37

slopsan · 16/09/2023 09:30

You love your dog more than your partner.

He needs to go to a&e.

This, except remove the "to A&E".

He doesn't sound like a good person or like you like him very much OP.

Original poster
Dogbitdp · 16/09/2023 14:49

6monthspost · 16/09/2023 14:37

This, except remove the "to A&E".

He doesn't sound like a good person or like you like him very much OP.

Show quote history

I don't think whether I like him much has a huge relevance to this issue (don't mean that in a snippy way btw!). I definitely don't like how he's been over the situation, I included the arrogance and drama queen info as I felt that was relevant background, and as it happens after speaking to him properly, was right on the money 😬 And I said we'd be over if he did try to pts behind my back because I think that's a pretty normal reaction to a massive betrayal and overreaction that would affect the DC too. Hes definitely getting more high maintenance as the years go by though I admit, which is difficult as I seem to be getting more chill and happy with life 😔

OP posts:
Prescottdanni123 · 16/09/2023 16:01

@ZebraD

Dog knew owner was shouting for her. She was not expecting him to march over and grab her suddenly. Grabbing the dog from behind and trying to drag it about like that is cruel at the best of times, let one wheb a dog is in pain. So she has had a fright, is in pain and he keeps pulling on her. She can't say to him "Stop it, that hurts," so she lashes out to get him to stop. If someone treated me like that, I'd be lashing out as well. There were no previous incidents before this.

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