Negatives of having a dog

[Sleepdeprived42long]

So, we are considering getting a dog to join our family which is currently me, DH, DS11 and DS9. I’ve had cats my whole life but not dogs. DH and DS11 are most keen but I’m definitely not against the idea!

We’ve had some bad luck with pets in the past so I really want us to make this decision with our eyes open not just to the positives (which we know) but also the negatives.

Just by way of background-if we did go with a dog, would probably dog like cockapoo/cavapoo or similar. We both WFH and enjoy family walks-we don’t see this changing in the next few years. We do sometimes go out for whole days at the weekend (although normally to the beach or similar) and go on holiday quite a lot (4-5 times a year for at least 2-3 nights but sometimes up to 10 nights). We could afford a dog but would have to make sacrifices on other luxuries (possibly a holiday or two!). My mental health isn’t great-I struggle with anxiety and depression at times.

So, for those of you who have dogs, can you tell me your honest negatives of dog ownership?

But my ddog is fine being left (actually can't be bothered to hang out with us in the house anyway) lives a trip to the pub and has a thing for music, in particular church organs, he howls along

Like everyone else has said, the main negative is how tying they are. You have to factor in the dog when making any plans at all. We’re lucky in that we have 4 people who live on our street who are more than happy to walk him or look in on him for us and one that even has him over night for us when we go away. I couldn’t bare to put him in kennels!

The puppy stage is also really, really hard. You will question why you’ve done it and you will genuinely consider sending them back to the breeder at least once (and threaten them with it much more) 😂.

I am also struggling with my mental health though and he’s the best antidepressant!

Negatives:
the costs - insurance has just gone up again, I’m paying £38 a month.

if you have a dog who won’t just sleep nicely while you WFH, like we have - you might end up with our situation of having to pay out for dog day care - at the moment we pay £25 a day for 3 days a week I’m out as dh couldn’t get any work done with DDog barking for attention. (Now at 2, she’s calming down and considering if we can try him wfh with dog about). £25 a day is towards the cheaper end of dog day care.

going away needs a dog factored in, do you have family who’d happily have the dog? We don’t and that’s expensive and difficult to source.

you have to walk the dog even if it’s pissing it down. Although that can be a good thing if you need to be forced to exercise.

as you are looking at poodle crosses, you won’t have the same fur issues as some owners (and that does make houses smell more than doodle dog houses) but be warned they need grooming regularly. Also when their fur is due a cut, you might have to deal with shit stuck in fur.

I think most of the ones I would say are covered. The only other thing I can think of applies to all other pets really. There will come a day where you have to say goodbye to them, and in many cases, make a decision to end their suffering. That's very very tough.

I have two. I love them very much but-

They’re a big tie-down and it’s hard to go away without making arrangements well ahead of time. Where I live, the good boarding kennels book up about 9 months in advance so it’s very hard to have a night away at short notice. I don’t have family nearby who can take them.
When you can get boarding, it can be expensive if for an extended stay.

They need a lot of exercise and stimulation. Walking in horrible weather and early morning starts on miserable winter days isn’t fun.

The mud. Mine just love it. My floors are constantly a mess.

Bad habits. One of mine just loves digging and eating plants. It means it’s hard to let her out in the garden unsupervised. She has the decency to look apologetic but refuses to remedy the issue.

They’re expensive. Insurance, food, toys, neutering, vet fees. It really adds up.

Finding a good groomer is difficult- they usually have waiting lists. Grooming is expensive. Keeping on top of grooming at home can take a lot of time, depending on the breed.

One of mine definitely isn’t typical for her breed. She’s very highly strung and difficult to train. We’ve spent a fortune on trainers and behaviourists who are at at loss. She’s exceptionally dominant and every day is a battle with her. While certain breeds broadly behave in a particular way, it’s no guarantee that an individual dog will be a good example of that breed.

*Standing outside in the pissing rain at 3.30am waiting 10 mins for them to find the perfect place to poop.

• Poop pick ups. We call it poop patrol
• Farts !!! 🤢
• Having to share my slippers because queen Roxy thinks they make a good dog bed.
• People !!! People who think they can just fuss my dog and hype her up on walks. I’m trying to have a calm, sensible dog. People high pitched fussing over her won’t help me achieve that !
• COST ! I knew this from previous dogs however this is my first puppy not from a rescue and omg the cost of things they need before they can even leave the house adds up fast. ((( with my rescues it was all just taken care of)))
• Insurance. It’s a minefield. Not all cover covers everything so that look a lot of brain energy I didn’t have from the 3.30am poops.
• Constant need like a baby/toddler
• knowing that it’s not forever and feeling guilty if I’m not making the most of her puppyhood.
• They get old really fast !
• They steal your heart without you even realising it.
• One day you have to say goodbye and a bit of you goes with them.

Stuff gets chewed, stuff you need or like
You get sick of picking up turds and carrying turd around in a bag and think surely i wasnt put on this earth for this?
Hair on everything you own no matter how much you hoover
Toilet training is very testing
Not all dogs have cast iron stomachs but they LOVE eating stuff they shouldn't = vomit, usually at really inappropriate moments
If you go out somewhere you have to plan the food, as not everywhere is dog friendly
You're on a timer whenever you're not doing something not dog friendly

Don't get a cockerpoo they are MAD! Everyone I know has problems with them. (I'll get flamed for saying that but from my experience it's true) I have a lovely little Bichon Frise all be it a bit mad at times but generally she's super well behaved and we haven't had any issues (she's 7 now). I would always suggest a Labrador as well having grown up with them but they moult and are quite big. They are a massive tie every time you want to go out for a few hours you have to take into account the dog or find someone to let them out. It's all fun in the summer but the winter is tough when there filthy and you have to bath them after every walk. You also need counter in kennel costs for holidays unless you have family who can have them. Overall I think they bring a lot of positives and love. They get you out as they still need to be walked but you do have to be prepared for the work and puppies are hard work! It's like having a baby all over again but with no nappies. My top advice would be to stay consistent with them. Establish your boundaries ie are they allowed on the bed/furniture/ eat/scrounge from the table because once you have created the monster ( again from experience) there's no going back.

We've not found any negatives with our working black lab.

The DC make more mess.
The DC are far more tying.
The DC are far pickier about food.
The DC are far grumpier.
The DC need encouraged to go for a walk.
The DC took years to sleep through the night.
The DC took years to potty train.
The DC find it far harder to make friends.
The DC are far more demanding of our time and money.

DDog is a dream and just slots into what we are doing. Buy good pet insurance.

For me it is the extra mental load and the fact you lose all spontaneity. Even if you take your dog on dog-friendly holidays, they can’t go everywhere (cinema on a rainy day? One of you can’t go). Eating out anywhere except a pub becomes almost impossible.

And I say that as someone whose dog is calm, good with people, doesn’t chase joggers or cyclists, will sit nicely in pubs etc.

With the breeds you are looking at your chances of a nice placid easygoing dog are much smaller!

Smell, hair, mud, lack of spontaneity, cost, heartbreak if they are ill and die.

Everything needs more planning! You have to make sure dog is looked after if you are out, getting stuck in traffic is a stress. Dog may have separation anxiety so take a long time to be able to be left, if you are getting a puppy it’s like having a toddler but worse! The kids may not help as much as you think, puppies chew everything, they need consistent training even to walk nicely! They can be tears even with all the training in the world.

The only real negative is the tie.

Best advice I can give is find another dog owner, and reciprocate with dog sitting for holidays etc. DSis and I do this, it makes a huge difference.

I’m not saying this with any authority, but if I were you then I’d consider getting on with it now (as opposed to waiting a few years). My parents got a dog when we a wee bit older than yours are, and I could see a shift in their mindset when we’d all moved out. By that point they’d had the dog 10 years and obviously loved him dearly, but they wanted to be able to swan off for weekends away at the drop of a hat and whatnot. I saw a smidgen of annoyance that even though they no longer had to consider the movements of any of us children, they still had this huge responsibility.

Just food for thought. Obviously it depends on what breed you get, so what lifespan, and also what you think your sons are likely to do.

You will outlive them 😢

They are expensive and tying but a wonderful addition to the family if you can accommodate these factors.
Rescue centres are facing an unprecedented capacity crisis so please consider adopting rather than funding a breeder and many rescues are looking for foster homes if you're still unsure if long term dog ownership is right for you

We, I say we because that's what I'm supposed to say, but realistically I have a Labrador.
Dog husbandry over the years has always fallen on my shoulders. So that's a negative straight away unless your family help out as they all promise to do.

Negatives are:
Poop scooping
Constant shedding (lab issue)
Financial expense, especially at the moment for me
Overnights if you want to go somewhere for a night
Being out of the house for the day unless you can get someone to go in and see/care for dog
Working hours (I'm part time)
Walking the dog if you are ill
Winter walking where he gets covered in mud and crap so needs either hosing or just towelling off but then he takes a while to dry so has to be confined to kitchen until he is dry otherwise rest of house gets wet/grubby

Lots of positives. I wouldn't be without him

I also agree with those who say your house does not have to stink.
I only had carpet in the hallway downstairs where he lives (doesn't go upstairs) and I got rid of that as it was old and stunk of previous inhabitants before we had the dog.
My house doesn't stink

No more lie ins as the dog will be desperate for a wee first thing in the morning.
Days out where dogs aren't allowed, can't leave dog all day.
Constant hoovering the endless hair despite having a low shedding breed!

I agree about house smelling with SOME breeds, however not our yorkie/chihuahua cross.

I have no idea why cockerpoos are so popular the breeders are often awful ie puppy farmers - and they can be really needy, flighty things - some of them grow up to look really odd too (of all the ones I've dog sat anyway, there's a million of them round here). And I wouldn't get a cav anything - they are the worst inbred of all dogs pretty much and have all sorts of health issues.

I'd recommend a whippet or a whippet cross. Much more chilled in every way. Really under rated IMO. Labs/golden retrievers are also much better - but much smellier and shed terribly. I'd also think about just how hard work puppies are and whether that is going to negatively affect your mental health further.

My ideal choice would be a slightly older whippet/whippet cross from a rescue - especially if you've had problems with pets before.

Its quite restrictive. Either the dog has to come with you or you limit how long you are out or you pay for a walker/daycare but they need to be booked, so its not easy to spontaneously go away for a weekend. The summer holidays here are booked up by Feb for overnight care here too. Plus some dogs arent that keen on kennels.

Expensive

Has damaged some property.

I wouldnt say my house stank, but the dog itself smells.

This is so very true!

My dog is a reactive rescue, and is a nightmare honestly.

She cannot be around other dogs, so anywhere dog-friendly is off limits to us with her, as well as anywhere not dog-friendly obviously. We cannot walk her through town, sit in a pub etc. We have to take her out into the countryside and hope we don't see anyone.

She barks a lot in the house - at the postman, neighbours, local squirrels, pigeons in the garden etc. I wfh, so she has company all day but she's still very barky.

Despite being a mongrel she has lots of health issues. Allergies, hip dysplasia etc. Vet bills are high, mental load of medication and vet checkups is high.

Some of these issues come from her history of being on the streets (we rescued her when we lived abroad and then she came home with us) and possibly could have been avoided if she was found earlier and trained, but some of it is definitely just her temperament.

Have forked our hundreds on training and behaviourists etc, and we are seeing baby steps improvements with our current trainer (who has been working with her for 18m) but she is likely to never be 'cured' of her reactivity and our whole lives revolve around managing that for her.

I won't be getting another dog for a while after this one pops her clogs. It's been so draining and not at all the dog ownership experience we expected. I do love her but she's hard work.

Mud in the house in winter, constant mopping
He ruined my garden for the first few years, finally been able to fill in the holes and reseed my grass now he's 3
Hair everywhere, was pulling it out if my mouth all day yesterday!
They stink
Slobber

But I love him 🖤

We have a 2 year old dog.
I'm not going to lie the first 9 months to a year was hard - training, poo accidents, wee accidents but now we are through that, it's become a lot easier.

As many people have said they are tying e.g. went to London as a family yesterday.
We had to take the dog for a long early walk, left the house at 11am was back by 18:30 - that's the longest we'd leave it. If it wasn't for the dog we could have stayed in London longer or we would have had to get a dog sitter.

Choose your breed and breeder very carefully or go to an excellent rehoming centre who can advise. Some cockerpoos /cavapoos are very badly bred and quite frankly a bit bonkers, nervous and hyper.
We went for a Australian labradoodle and our dog's mum was a therapy dog in primary schools - good temperament with DC was our top priority.

The pros far outweigh the cons. Getting out for a walk

I love seeing how my DH truly relaxes when him and our dog are having cuddles in the evening on the sofa