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The doghouse

If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

Original poster

I don't know how I'm going to do it, even though I know I must and will

80 replies

morelippy · 07/05/2023 09:29

Our girl is fading, and while she's ok atm, it won't be long before we need to be brave for her.

I will, I absolutely will not let her go too long. But I just don't know how I will get through it. The thought of deciding when, actually going through with it. I love her so much.

I've lost family in the last few years and now I'm losing my girl. I just don't think I can do it.

I'm sorry I don't even know the point of this post.

OP posts:
DoeRayMe · 07/05/2023 19:22

Cloud 9 vets will come to your home. They cover virtually the whole of the UK and can help arrange cremation afterwards.

Or if you are not too far Cambridge pet cremation allows you to take your pet there yourself to be cremated, they have I think 4/5 branches around the country

So sorry xx

Original poster
morelippy · 07/05/2023 19:43

I'm so grateful for the replies. Husband is fully with me on this and as determined as I am that we will do what it right for her. I can't talk out loud too much though, as I end up in tears..

It's helpful posting on here though, so thank you.

OP posts:
Floramac · 07/05/2023 21:48

I stayed with my girl and held her. The vets were so very kind and understanding. I do hope your vets will give you answers and options. Stay strong. We are sharing your pain, I promise.

Larabelle6 · 07/05/2023 23:00

Oh this is so difficult. Only thread I’ve posted on in months…

I had to make this decision just over a month ago. My boy was doing ok and “plodding on” but he didn’t really have good days any longer, some were just less bad than others. I cried and cried and I made the call.

We had a long weekend - we let family visit, spoilt him and cuddled him. Mentally it was difficult wondering if I was being a bit hasty but in reality, as the vet said - it was the last good thing I could do for him.

the event itself was calm and peaceful. He’d never been phased by the vets so we didn’t do it at home. He got his usual fuss and biscuits from the receptionists (they knew him well by this point). Once he was sleeping I cried a lot more but very quickly sadness became relief. Relief I’d made the decision and stuck to it. He was at peace and out of pain.

I was in one of our cars yesterday and the last time I’d been in was to take him and there was his collar and lead - I didn’t cry, I smiled. We have a lovely little section of the garden for him and I miss him like mad. I think about him all of the time, my other dog has really only just settled and my 3 year old mentions him often. What a dog he was and what a life we had together.

One of the hardest things you’ll have to go through but wishing you all the best, you know you’re doing the right thing. Hold her tight and know you’re doing “the last good thing for her”.

xxx

Sunflowers765 · 07/05/2023 23:04

OP I'm crying reading these posts. We lost our beautiful girl last year unexpectedly after a very short illness that was terminal and she was PTS in my arms eating her favourite treats. It was actually lovely that she was with me at the end and was happy and knew nothing about it. I actually felt her go and it was very peaceful.
But the hardest thing I've ever done. I remember the vet saying are you ready and me saying yes and it was like someone else speaking not me.
It was a year ago and I still can't believe it happened.
❤️ to everyone that has been through this or is going through it . It's our last gift to our wonderful doggos FlowersFlowers

kwetu · 07/05/2023 23:18

Heartbreaking isn't it, we knew when our old girl had had enough and booked the vet to home visit to have her pts she had the best final days eating anything and everything she was never previously allowed, lots of love and visitors to say their goodbyes, it truly helped us get through it, though I did still cry for two weeks. Should also mention you don't have to use your usual vets for home visits if they don't offer them, we used a different one and they were truly wonderful, organised the cremation and delivered ashes back to us within a week. My heart goes out to you 💐

Floralnomad · 08/05/2023 00:00

I think it’s probably useful to remember the Paul O’ Grady quote -
To take any animal into your life will inevitably end in heartache, but you don't worry about the hangover when you're at the party

Badgeringabout · 08/05/2023 09:03

She has been your world, now you must be her strength.

Beautiful sentiment Floramac

Floramac · 08/05/2023 12:00

We had Kenzie cremated. I searched everywhere and found a wonderful lady on Etsy who made a beautiful bespoke box. She will be with us always in our hearts and minds and home. It has been over a year and a day does not go by without thinking of her and being grateful for the years we shared. The joy and love they bring is immeasurable and although, as Paul O'grady says they must leave us too soon, it is so worth it. Thinking of you.

I don't know how I'm going to do it, even though I know I must and will
Utterlybrokenhearted · 08/05/2023 13:58

I’ve just been in your position OP and had to go through it, it was the the most devastating thing I have ever had to do, but I had to do it, if I didn’t do it at the time I did, she would have had a frightening and painful death and I would never have forgiven myself, that would have haunted me forever.

Filde · 09/05/2023 21:36

Euthanasia means ‘a good death’. Here’s what gave my beautiful boy a beautiful death - he died at home, with the vet and me sitting by him on the floor, munching his way through the best part of an organic roast chicken, as I told her stories about his life. He didn’t know a thing about it. It was instant, and when the vet said ‘he’s gone’ I said ‘I know as there is some chicken left in the tray’ (Labrador). It was entirely fitting and absolutely perfect, and (many hours afterwards) I cried with relief that we managed it and there wasn’t a middle of the night rush to a strange place for him.

I took him to a pet crematorium myself - this is not for everyone - but really helped me. I can’t pretend I timed it perfectly (he’d fallen over that morning) or that I was that strong afterwards, but there is a huge amount of comfort in his last minutes being exactly what I wanted for him. Whatever you do, please make sure there’s some comfort for you in this, OP. All the best. You’ve got this.

Original poster
morelippy · 09/05/2023 22:29

I can't put in to words how you're all helping, but thank you for responding to a stranger

She's still okish. Eating less, doing less. I've checked with the vet about a home visit and have a plan for when that's needed and what comes after.

Very much lurching from tears to feeling I can do this. I have cancelled everything for the rest of the week so can do whatever whenever it's needed.

I always knew this would be hard. Didn't really realise how hard though 😢

OP posts:
mixedrecycling · 10/05/2023 05:08

Well, you are facing what all of us dread but know will come. Thinking of you. Hold on to the good memories, give your girl as much time and love as you can. It is hard for you, but she is just experiencing your love and care and won't know what's happening.

Filde · 10/05/2023 14:40

@morelippy hows your girl today? Hope you’re all holding up. Mine told me when it was time, he just didn’t rally anymore and was so tired, and he went from ok to not ok very quickly. You might find she does the same but might be that she rallies too, so you have to take it day by day. It’s just awful - thinking of you.

Justkeepingplatesspinning · 10/05/2023 16:15

I hope your girl is doing okay today, OP. I could have written your first post about our old boy who went over the bridge in October. I was dreading it and didn't know what to expect but the vet talked us through everything and made it all seem normal and natural. Thoughts coming your way.

Original poster
morelippy · 10/05/2023 17:12

Hi.. thank you for your thoughts. She's much the same really, not eating much but we still have a bit of a waggy tail. We're trying to gauge when it would be right to call the vet, we'd like to pre empt anything getting worse.

I'm not sleeping or eating and crying a lot, but it's just how it is.

OP posts:
SoosanCarter · 11/05/2023 04:51

I’m holding your hand, OP. My beloved Lab had a fit yesterday, rallied a bit but is now dying, I think he has had a stroke. I’m waiting for the morning to ring the vet, and debating wether or not to call out the night vets. I can’t sleep, just listening to his very fast and shallow breathing.

Original poster
morelippy · 11/05/2023 09:03

@SoosanCarter I'm so sorry. It's heartbreaking isn't it. Thinking of you too today Flowers

OP posts:
Original poster
morelippy · 11/05/2023 12:19

It's done.

I'm absolutely heartbroken but also so relieved, for her and for us.

Going to miss her forever.

OP posts:
Newpeep · 11/05/2023 15:35

I’m so sorry. Our dog was 17 and had good quality of life until the last month or so when she steadily started to decline cognitively. We were up and down had THAT conversation with the vet, put it off until one Sunday she had a fantastic walk in her favourite place then suddenly became very lethargic. We took her to bed with us that night intending to make the call the next morning. She had a massive seizure at 6 am and never recovered. Our vet ended her suffering a couple of hours later. Not what we wanted and we left it too long but we’ve learnt from that.

It’s the worst thing to look the vet in the eye and ask them to kill your best friend.

Utterlybrokenhearted · 11/05/2023 16:01

So sorry @morelippy it really is the most awful thing to have to make that call, I know exactly how you feel.

Floralnomad · 11/05/2023 16:37

Sorry for your loss @morelippy 💐🐾

Filde · 11/05/2023 16:41

I’m sorry. Hope you’re looking after yourselves. When you’re ready, would you like to tell us about her? X

SoosanCarter · 11/05/2023 17:10

My Kris has crossed the Rainbow Bridge. The vets were wonderful, I phoned them at 8.05, they reorganised the surgeries so they could come straight out so I didn’t have to wait til mid morning. They were very kind and compassionate.
all very peaceful.
my heart is breaking, but I’m glad the end was peaceful.

I lay next to him and told him that he was my world, I loved him very much, and I was going to stay with him until the very end, and I would never leave him. I would always be there. And he was the best dog ever.

Floralnomad · 11/05/2023 17:21

Sorry for your loss @SoosanCarter 💐🐾