Parents dislike boyfriends dog

[Doodles29]

Hi all.

I am 26 and currently living with my parents. I have a dog and my parents have a dog (they are siblings).

My boyfriend has a working dog and everywhere he goes, the dog goes. He can leave her, but she can’t be left for long and he doesn’t always like to leave her.

My parents have expressed that his dog is highly energetic and ‘won’t stop’ (which is true). When she is at my parents, she runs around, jumps on sofas, whips her tails in peoples faces and doesn’t give them much space. Our dogs are allowed on the sofas but they are calm indoors.

We have always been a close family. It upsets me that I can’t have my boyfriend over for dinner with my parents, as they have expressed that they do not want the dog around.

I am moving in with my boyfriend at Easter. He called me today and offered to come over tomorrow to help me have a clear out of my things / sort things into boxes. I gave my parents the heads up and I was immediately met with an eye roll and told that we would need to do this in the garden. I think I may just make up and excuse and sort my boxes out myself, but I could have really done with an extra hand.

I don’t know how to go about this now. I don’t want to be honest with my boyfriend about things as I don’t want to cause friction between him and my parents. But equally I don’t want him thinking that we are rude hosts.

I do understand my parents side of things, although it is frustrating when my boyfriend doesn’t get invited to things because of his dog. I can’t even make up the excuse to say that ‘we’re not dog people’.

any advice would be great, please

Agree! But it depends what mood they are in!

Will your parents not keep your dog with theirs , it seems a bit cruel to separate them when they’ve always lived together and in particular to be taking your dog to live with a dog that it doesn’t like . WRT the current situation just tell him that your parents are not fond of his dog so could he leave it at home .

Why does the dog have to go everywhere?

Probably destroys the boyfriend's home if left

Yes I agree.
They are very lively mischievous dogs but also have a lot of good points.
Ofc the Bf and the OP need to be considerate of the parents house and feelings, and tbh if the OP is moving out then the issue will only happen in future for visits and arrangements can be made/training given/ leave dog st home couple of hours in order to reduce the nuisance factor.
But let’s keep it in perspective.
Possibly OP should sort and pack most of her own stuff anyway, that might give parents a breathing space from the issue, and Bf could come round to stack or load the finished boxes once springer is asleep!!

Nowadays a lot of dog owners crate train their dogs so they are safe when left for couple of hours. Or use stair gates on kitchen door etc so dog settles in one room and can’t decide to chew something it shouldn’t

I’m really not getting this trend of never leaving your dogs, sounds very restrictive and ridiculous to me and this is someone who grew up and have had dogs at verifies stages of my life.

Are you sure this is what you want? All you dates and life and everything revolving around his dog?

Same here even when I had dogs. I wouldn’t just take my dog to peoples houses anytime I wanted, makes no sense and is just selfish behavior from someone who thinks the sun shines from his dogs ass.

Honestly is your boyfriend totally obtuse that it hasn't occurred to him that not everyone is happy to face his crazy spaniel going mental around their house.
I'd simply tell him that my parents find your dog a bit much so ask that you meet at his house or he leaves dog at home for a hour or two.

Your partner is tha problem, not the dog. We have a Springer and he's well trained and wouldn't behave like that indoors. He used to work though is retired now. He's a lovely chap!

If I had a dog which behaved like that in other people’s homes then I wouldn’t take the dog with me. I know it’s not fair for dogs to be left alone for hours on end but equally they do need to learn to settle alone. What happens when he goes to work? Does the dog go with him?
Really it’s either train the dog to settle elsewhere, train the dog to settle alone or he doesn’t get to visit other people’s homes.

Crate train the dog for convenience.

Figure out how to talk honestly to your boyfriend BEFORE you move in with him.

Get the dog trained before you move in and talk to your BF, it’s a valid reason to not have his dog in their home. Plus think of your own poor calm dog. It is really not fair at all to move them in to that environment plus how long have your parents dog and your dog been together. It may just be better to leave your own dog at your parents because if they have known each other for years it’s pretty cruel to break them up.

The dog might be a working breed, but it is absolutely not a working dog. It’s an untrained dog who behaves that way because its brain is not engaged.