Puppy Survival Thread: Surviving into Summer 2022

[tizwozliz]

Discussion of all things puppy, highlights and pitfalls, good times and bad, successes and failures

Previous thread here

www.mumsnet.com/talk/the_doghouse/4496297-Puppy-Survival-Thread-muddy-footprints-into-Spring-2022

Teenagers also welcome

Hello, can we join too? I’ve added the obligatory puppy pic!

I was wondering how normal this is? Puppy is now 19 weeks. She cannot bear to be left alone. During the day she’s like Velcro to me, I think she’s sleeping and will nip to get a drink and she’s there at my feet. If I put her behind the gate to answer the door (so she can still see me from 2m away) she will cry.

I'm beside myself with puppy blues.I need to start leaving her alone to take my kids to school (approx 20 mins out of the house) but she goes mad; howling, crying, pooing. I’m terrified I’m setting her up to never cope with being alone but I have no choice but to leave her. DP says she will get over it but everything I read says it’s a big no no. Is my puppy especially anxious or is this normal? What can I do to help?

Can I also ask a question about nighttime and sleeping arrangements?

Pup is like a newborn and only likes to sleep on someone but only for short periods. I brought the crate upstairs to be next to my bed but it doesn't stop her crying. The only way she stops crying is either lying next to her on the floor or letting her fall asleep on me and then transferring her to the crate when she's asleep but she's probably awake every hour or so

I'm just wondering whether we would have been best keeping her in the downstairs crate and either one of us sleeping down there or letting her cry until she settled ?? Or is it just a case of riding it out?

Just looking to see what other people mainly did / are doing?

@Moonflowered I have a crate in the bedroom, which is really far from the back door. Luckily she won't wee in the crate so when she needs to go out she wakes me with little noises and then I pick her up and carry her down to the back door. This ensures she won't wee on the way and she won't wee when being held either. I don't know if that's normal or the exception?? I saw on a good training video that once they have been carried down a few times, you should put them down inside the door and get them used to waiting while you open it, so they make the link with waiting for the door to be opened and then walking through it. That has been 95% successful for me, but she did wee while waiting a couple times.
If she wasn't in the crate I wouldn't have trusted her in the bedroom and still wouldn't until I'm sure her training is 100% bedded in. So I guess what I have said depends on whether your pup sleeps in a crate or not.
Also, our pup was almost completely silent for the first few weeks but she has found her voice now so hopefully yours will soon too!

@GuyFawkesDay that is a gorgeous doggy!!

@Citygirlrurallife our pup also jumps up for attention all the time. I've noticed when she does it to the trainer in puppy classes, the trainer just stands completely still and ignores her until she gets down. Then she soon sits and politely waits for attention. She is then rewarded with the attention. I've been trying this at home and it seems to work but I'm not very consistent as I kind of love it when she jumps up to me, but I know I need to train her out of it for other peoples sake.

Lovely puppy photos 😍
sorry to hear about the separation anxiety issues some of you are having. I haven’t got any tips other than don’t feel guilty for leaving them (harder said than done I know)

Foxpup is now 15 weeks. I think she’s actually better than a few weeks ago. Less bitey, listens more, goes to sleep on a night so so much better since I started putting a blanket over her crate. She loves people, dogs and walks and is generally a lovely little dog. Obviously she’s always in the dishwasher, steals socks and nips when she’s over excited!

An unexpected joy from having her is chatting to other dog owners when we’re out on a walk. It’s been lovely meeting new people and their dogs. I did a full walk this morning with a complete stranger and his dog.

@SummerBummers mine was very similar until he was about 6 months, I couldn’t even go for a wee or brush my teeth without him! He’s now 10 months and absolutely fine being left, it really was just a case of waiting until he was confident and doing it very gradually. There’s a great Facebook group I use which has lots of tips and videos on dogs who struggle to be left

@Isthislife we do that when standing but when sitting at a table he jumps up and then grabs clothes so you can’t stand without ripping clothes….

@Autumn101what a great picture. It looks as though he was really enjoying his freedom. We were in a similar situation. My pup had an injury that required stitches and he was restricted to short walks on the lead for 10 days. He was quite patient and calm but clearly missing his usual exercise. Yesterday the vet gave the all clear and the pup was able to romp in the fields. He was so happy, it was lovely to see.

He's such a sweetheart. Even if he did steal a piece of bacon from a plate that DH had inadvisedly left on the coffee table this morning!

@Autumn101just to clarify my message, I mean the picture of your pup from the previous page. Though the picture from the Facebook group is nice too. 😀

@Autumn101 thanks for your reply. Were you able to be with him at all times until he was 6 months? We take ours out whenever we can and won’t be doing any long trips out or anything until she’s ready, it’s just this school run. Literally takes me twenty mins but dogs aren’t allowed on the school grounds and the DC can’t be dropped at the gate.

I feel like she’s being a bit more independent, she takes herself off for a wee or to find a bit of dried dead animal chew that’s she’s hidden previously. I’m just panicking that leaving her for short bursts means she’s never going to get it.

@SummerBummers yes pretty much we were with him all the time. My DC are secondary age and DH works from home and I’m taking a break from work for a bit so we were lucky to be able to manage it. I did put him in a small doggy daycare a morning a week which he loved and gave me a break! We don’t use it anymore as he’s so much better.

I started small, sitting right next to a stair gate with my hand through it touching him, then moved away a foot then another foot etc. We did a lot of flitting so running upstairs and back down in 30 seconds and just gradually increased as he got comfortable. It did sometimes go backwards as well as forwards

He is still quite a velcro dog, if I move rooms he moves with me even if fast asleep! If I’m cooking he’ll lie on my feet too which is quite cute

Feeling like a proud pup parent - River Pup slept from 7.30pm until almost 6pm! Undisturbed night! Did a poo, had a funny ten minutes and now slept next to me for another hour (almost).

Regarding jumping up, I’ve always gently pushed him away and look away. Ie. Make it boring. He knows not to jump up at me, but he jumps up more for dh who is more vocal.

Crate training - we put river pup in from day 1 and had to get up several times during the night. After a rough night (where he wanted only to sleep on our lap), I came downstairs and slept on the sofa next to his crate. Also removed water bowl so he didn’t drink (and need a wee) during the night. Did that for a week and things have definantly improved.

Hes always slept better during the day. Now trying to encourage him to spend time in their awake so dh can get some work done undisturbed.

We were always with River Pup and was told that consequently, he was being over stimulated. We’ve tried to tone things down, and it does seem to be working..

One thing we do when grabbing clothes, is give the command drop, then give him a toy to bite on instead. Not saying it works every time, but then he gets to chew that rather than ds’s North Face hoody (here’s looking at you River Pup).

(Sorry for long post! )

@Riverlee how did you get to the point of teaching the command? I’ve been following east peasy puppy squeezy but can’t beyond stage one so he doesn’t know what we mean when we say drop

sit is now working 80% of the time when he jumps up

Sleeping at night...

what's normal at 9weeks? I feel like we've got a nice little routine going... she wakes and sniffles about; I take her outside and she toilets pretty speedily ( which I'm grateful for in the cold ) then I sit next to her crate whilst she falls asleep on my knee and i transfer her back to the crate... ( she'll happily take herself off into the daytime crate for a nap but won't entertain going into the nighttime crate awake) and it's rinse and repeat every 90mins- 2hours.

Just wondering when I might get some more sleep though ??!

@BoxerPups oof it's like having a newborn! I think 9 weeks is so little so prob to be expected can't hold bladder for too long. Our pup was 10.5 weeks when she came to us as she'd had a hernia op and she generally went in crate about 10pm woke about 2am for toilet then again at 5.30 - at this point she wouldn't go back in the crate but would go back to sleep in front room if I stayed on sofa! The 2am wake stopped about 12/13 weeks I think but the 5.30 continued for a lot longer!!

I’m at my wits end. Little puppy shrieks and cries and howls when she’s alone. She’s nearly 20 weeks old. I’ve tried all sorts of gentle training. She sleeps upstairs with us and we do our very upmost to be with her at all times.

She’s left for 20 mins twice a day, 3 days a week. Today I could hear her crying from halfway down the street. It’s hugely triggering my social anxiety knowing people are going to be complaining.

I have no option but to leave her. I have to take my kids to school. I have to go into school grounds to deliver my son as he has ASD and needs this support. Dogs aren’t allowed into school grounds.

I never anticipated she would be this bad but before we got her, puppies were allowed onto school premises if carried so I thought I’d have that as a back up. This isn’t allowed anymore.

Everything I read says separation anxiety will get worse and worse the more she is left alone.

I just don’t know what to do anymore.

Everyone’s stories are so similar. River Pup seems to have 1 1/2 -2 hours awake, and then asleep for similar length of time.

Two nights ago, RiverPup slept and omitted the 1am wakening. Last night, awoke at 1am, so back to feeling tired again today.

@Citygirlrurallife Repetition, Repetition, Repetition - and he doesn’t always do it.

Enjoying my plants in the sunshine!

I only lurk on these threads for the puppy stories but you sounded so stressed I thought I would reply.

What have you tried?

Radio?
Different settings on where you leave her?
Flitting back and forth behind a baby gate to get her used to you coming and going?
A Kong when you leave her?

I recommend getting a camera that streams to your phone so you can see if anything triggers her to cry.

Thank you for replying. I am so stressed. I feel so guilty for leaving her and I’m worried I’m harming her.

We’ve tried the radio, both music and talking stations.

We’ve tried her in Her crate, in a puppy pen, in the kitchen behind a baby gate and with free run of the house.

We’ve left her with stuffed kongs or some of her favourite treats. She completely ignores them.

Nothing makes any difference.

In terms of training I’ve tried lots of flitting, lots of trying to build things up slowly. The problem is that she can’t cope, even for 30 seconds. I assume because I’ve had to leave her for longer so she panics.

We have blink cams on her so I can watch her from my phone. She starts to cry as soon as we’ve gone and doesn’t let up. My neighbours must think I’m evil. I’ve tried speaking to her through them but it does nothing to soothe her either.

I dread having to get my kids from school every day because I just feel so cruel.

Ok taking a step back would it help to try a routine given all the different things you have tried.

My dog knows as soon as I open the back door and give him the command to pee he will be left on his own and jumps on the sofa. And we did have to try many things as a puppy to get him happy on his own so solidarity from a now older dog owner.

Maybe a set routine before being left a few mins at a time so routine, then step outside and back again and then a bit longer might help.

Or get a 1-1 trainer round to support you in RL (it helps to have a real person to talk to about strategies) to work on this.

Hi @SummerBummers We have a 4 month old Cockapoo and although she is a Velcro puppy, we don't have any problems leaving her for up to an hour when we go out. I thought if I let you know what we do, there may be something you haven't tried.

We have a dog crate in our lounge and it has a blanket over it. When she gets bitey or zooms round, we put her in the crate for quiet time but we are always in her eyeline as we watch tv or something. So, by doing this regularly through the day she has learnt to associate her crate with the place to be calm and sleep.

When we are going to leave her to go out, we start the process about 10 mins early. We out her in her crate, give her a dog biscuit and tell her to lie down. I put the radio on. Then, we get ready to go with her seeing and hearing us putting our shoes on etc, with us just keep repeating to lie down if she has a little cry.

I do think a big part of her being so good is that we stuck with the routine and didn't try lots of different things. She also sleeps 10.30-7.00 every night in her crate so is used to not having that human comfort overnight.

I really hope you can crack it and you can be less anxious leaving her. I'm sure you'll get there. I did prewarn my neighbours that if they hear her crying, it's just that I'm training her and they put my mind at ease and told me not to worry.

Good luck.

@SummerBummers could you take her in car on school run and leave her in the car while you pop in to collect the children? It’d be less time alone for her and hopefully less stressful for you?

Unfortunately I don’t drive because this probably would’ve been an easier option. 2 days out of 5 my partner is around during school run time so he has her.

I have made contact with a one-to-one trainer and she says it’s not safe to leave her in the crate and ideally I shouldn’t leave her at all (duh!).

Well yes in an ideal world no one would leave their dog alone but life happens so I would find someone who might be more understanding and help you devise a strategy.