Guess what I found in my garden today thanks to Ddog

[LostForWords2021]

I thought we were at a point where Ddog could be left for a couple of hours, trust everyone to shut bedroom doors etc

An ancient dildo?

A dead rabbit.

Nearly ruined my thread with the first reply...

Your DD's dirty knickers? As a teenager, these were our pups most desired object.

He does live for an open bathroom or bedroom door with a dirty g string on the other side....

Used sanitary item?

Condom?

An outraged baby blue tit?
(This happened to us recently...)

Half the fucking house if he's related to my friends lab that I'm looking after!!

Oh no, I hope it's not much longer and also not much more damage!

Tampon

If he's anything like our cats,

• a half dead shrew


• a live, active thrush with its intestines hanging out


• a half dead wren


• another half dead shrew (in DH's slipper)


• a live, screaming rat (in the cat's mouth at DD's birthday party)


• a dead shrew


• a fucking live MAGPIE in the dining room. How?!


• a dead mouse

and that's in the last week.

a live, screaming rat (in the cat's mouth at DD's birthday party)

Congrats to your cat on their impeccable timing!

Next-door's second best bong

My last Dcat brought a live magpie in through the catflap when we were out. We came home to lots of bird droppings all over the kitchen and the magpie sitting on a wall cupboard very chirpy.

Fox Shit he rolled in? Had that experience before 🤮

My DSis found her DDog with a massive, I mean huge fish is his mouth. The garden is secure, there are no streams or ponds and they're vegetarians. She's just clueless as to how he managed it.

this is hideous, that poor wildlife. Can’t you do anything to stop it?

The remains of a previously-buried pet?

Nothing

Your sparkling new, only used once dildo?

I need to know, it is bed time

A small Dildo
Vibrating in the back garden
It's not mine

pmsl

😂😂Leave in the middle of the dining room table with a note about the dangers of eating batteries.

Your cats need bells.