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The doghouse

If you're worried about your pet's health, please speak to a vet or qualified professional.

Original poster

Separation anxiety

17 replies

workaholicsinglemom · 08/06/2017 21:16

I'm hoping someone can offer some advice in relation to my dog...

He is 5 and has always suffered severe separation anxiety ... I am starting to realise just how bad he is and how much it is effecting my day to day life.

He is only left for an 1-3 hours here and there usually at a weekend. He goes to a dog sitter whilst I am at work.

When left at home he barks, pants constantly , jumps up the gate and wees and poos everywhere (he is in the kitchen with a stair gate not a closed door) he does all of this when left for just 10 minutes even if he has just had a 1 hour walk.

I have tried dog trainers who gave up and said he was too bad, I have tried those plug ins, I have tried every training tip I can find online.

It's getting to the point that I don't want to leave the house as I can't be bothered with coming home to his mess and also having him panting under my feet for 20 minutes after i return. This aside he is the most loving dog and I could never rehome him. I am worrying also that one day he may en d up having a heart attach cause he gets himself so worked up.

Has anyone had a similar issue with a dog and been prescribed anxiety medication by a vet ?. I know my dog and I know there is no amount of behavioural training that will conquer his anxiety. I have even tried borrowing a friends dog for company but his behaviour distressed the other dog. Any advice greatly appreciated

OP posts:
cantthinkofanythingwitty · 08/06/2017 21:27

My dog has separation anxiety too. I was told by the vets to put him down Angry that obviously was not an option.

everything that you have said is identical to how my dog is, apart from adding in he does not get on with most dogs as well.

The only way that I can leave him is with two dogs who he gets along with, they are very laid back dogs and he does still have anxiety but after ten minutes or so he does calm down and sleep but only with these two dogs.

Maybe you could try more laid back dogs with him. I know exactly what you mean about feeling like you can't leave the house, I feel exactly the same and it can get to you at times but having the two laid back dogs has really helped. Also I know a few people that use borrow my dog to arrange for people to take their dogs out when they are planning to go out.

Sorry I haven't really suggested anything helpful, I just wanted to say that I do understand. Our dog is a rescue and I'm not sure if we know how bad he was that we would have had him, having said that I love him to pieces even if he is hard work

CornflakeHomunculus · 08/06/2017 21:32

What methods did the trainers suggest you try? And were they all either members of or accredited by reputable organisations (such as the APBC, APDT, CAPBT or IMDT)? If not then I would recommend finding someone through one of those groups to try and help you. Anyone call themselves a behaviourist or trainer and start charging people for their services, there's plenty about who are still pedalling outdated advice or are just not that good.

Medication may well be an option but not on its own, training will be necessary as well. The goal with medication is that it controls the dog's anxiety enough so they're in a state where they're receptive of behavioural modification. The difficulty with full blown separation anxiety is that you essentially can't fix the problem whilst still leaving them in distress.

This article is well worth a read (it covers medication use) as are the various articles and sites linked to at the end of it. The FB group Dog Training Advice and Support is well worth joining and asking for either advice about the SA or for recommendations for reputable behaviourist/trainer in your area.

MrsJayy · 08/06/2017 21:33

Our dog has calmex on occasion if i know he is going to be bad and a kong filled with cheese spread and treats, i started giving the kong randomly so he didnt associate with me going out so built it up. I just leave i dont make a huge fuss but i swear our body language changes and jaydog picks up on it but he is better than he used to be.

Nifflerbowtruckle · 08/06/2017 21:40

My dog only likes being left if she's in her cage with it covered up. Only the back is uncovered for air and that faces the wall. I also have the tv on quite loud on a 'happy channel'. I think if she's left out she thinks she needs to guard the house whereas in her cage she's confined and feels more secure. Does he react differently with the door shut/radio on or does it not matter at all.

Original poster
workaholicsinglemom · 08/06/2017 22:10

Cantthinkofanytgingwitty ..... Thank you for taking the time to respond. It's good to know I am not the only one in Thai situation. My dog is great with other dogs but when left alone with another dog it doesn't help. It's almost like his anxiety is so severe nothing helps him. It's not just being separated from me. It's the same if any human who he is not attached to is the last to leave the house. Today my mom left him for 10 minutes to go to the shops she came back to such a mess.

OP posts:
Original poster
workaholicsinglemom · 08/06/2017 22:14

Cornflake ... Thank you for posting the articles I will have a read now. I am willing to try anything.

The 2 trainers I used were recommended to me by the vet... Not sure what their qualifications were but they came highly recommended . The second trainer told me it was the worst case of delegation anxiety he had ever come across

OP posts:
Original poster
workaholicsinglemom · 08/06/2017 22:16

Mrsjay... Thank you I will look in to calmex ... My dog has no interest in Kings or any other toy. I sometimes leave him treats but he's so anxious he has no interest in them.

OP posts:
Wolfiefan · 08/06/2017 22:19

I'm afraid the advice is not to leave a dog with separation anxiety. At all. Every time you leave it reinforces how terrifying it is that you have gone.
All the doggy friends, covered crates, plug ins, radios on won't distract from what must feel like e prolonged panic attack.
Identify when the anxiety starts. You need to stop before this. So if it starts when you pick your keys up then don't. Touch them and walk away.
The trick is to do no more than your dog is comfortable with. It should be solvable. But will be more difficult because your dog has had the problem for so long and the behaviour is ingrained.

Haint · 08/06/2017 22:23

There is a very good Facebook group called Dog Training Advice and Support. It takes a while to have your join request approved but you can view without. Check their files. Good, clear step by step training guides

Good luck

cantthinkofanythingwitty · 08/06/2017 23:07

I would be really interested if you do find something that works OP as I can't continue to borrow the other dogs Indefinitely so other options would be great and it seems that our dogs are quite similar in their behaviour.

Have you tried popping your dog into a crate whilst you go out? I haven't personally tried but having seen someone else mention it further up thread I think I might try it as it's the one thing I have never tried as I always assumed he would hate it.

Wolfiefan · 08/06/2017 23:13

Crating a dog with separation anxiety will only lead to injury.
You can't leave a dog for any longer than it is happy with. Look at the links cornflake posted.

MrsJayy · 09/06/2017 08:16

Aww work that is such a shame your dog is so stressy they can't cope with treats.it took us months and months to get jaydog into treats he just about coped with his meals never mind treats

MrsJayy · 09/06/2017 08:19

wolfie you are so right about ingrained behaviour it is such a shame for the dogs who have behaviours in them that causes them so much stress.

corgiology · 14/06/2017 22:17

Look up malena de martini she has a book on the topic which is really good

applesareredandgreen · 16/06/2017 16:35

Have you tried a thunder coat / Kalm coat? They are supposed to have the same effect as swaddling a baby, make them feel secure.

I bought one initially after reading about one on a thread on here, hoping to calm my dog when we had visitors, as he was so excitable. We didn't have any problems leaving him at first (built up to 4 hours over summer holiday last year when we had as a puppy) he was fine on in our kitchen with a few treats etc but at about 6 months we came back s few times to damage (wallpaper torn off etc). I couldn't say if he had developed separation anxiety or if it was due to boredom, however we started putting the thunder coat on him when we went out and he's been fine since. He normally has a go at his kong but then goes and sleeps/sulks in his cage.

I was wondering also if your dog would prefer it if he was actually shut in the kitchen so that he didn't actually see you leave?

Veterinari · 16/06/2017 20:36

Medication can absolutely help - it controls a dog's anxiety to the point they can learn new coping strategies. But for it to be effective you need a plan developed by an APBC accredited behaviourist working in conjunction with a vet.

bluetongue · 17/06/2017 00:33

Sorry to hear about your dog OP. I'm trying to work out the best plan for my separation anxiety dog and it's so stressful. I'm off to the vet today to ask about medication and have a trainer booked to see him next week.

As harsh as it sounds, if I can't fix it I'm considering returning him to his breeder (he's only four months old). I suffer from depression and anxiety myself and the situation has already had a significantl effect on my mental health. I've had to take a number of days off work sick because I just can't stop crying Sad

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