Today I have mostly been......

[LibidinousSwine]

Swinging off the boys ears
Swimming in cattle troughs
Eating cow shit
Yapping very loudly when I run fast.

Now I'm home I have almost removed the throw off of my sofa that mum had to buy as I steadfastly refused to have "sleeping on the sofa" trained out of me and am about to fall asleep upside down.

Can a dog have a better life than this

:)

Yesterday I walked miles over the downs and got so tired I had to ask for a carry then I shared chicken with my human slept on her jumper for an hour played ball in the garden went out the front door and played in the next t street (think I may have been in trouble for that as she was crying when she caught up with me) had another carry home and slept on the bed all night. Today hasn't been so good went for a big early walk got left left!!! At this strangely clean place where I fell asleep and just woke up feeling very sore and like I'm missing something.

Today has been a good day. I ate my breakfast and managed to eat half of old dogs breakfast as well. Then ate some rubbish from the bin. Then did some gardening, then had a snooze. Then had a lovely long walk through the woods. I managed to eat some sheep poo but was caught before I could roll in the fox poo, but I did have a nice refreshing wallow in the smelly pond. I am now dozing in a pleasant cloud of doggy pong before I start to ask for my dinner, after which I will help the human cook by sitting right in front of the cooker or sink.

Yesterday I looked after punter mum by following her every step during breakfast prep, then eating my meal in 40 seconds followed by any toast crumbs falling from the table. Then barked through the window at children passing by on their way to school. It worked as eventually they had all gone. Stared at next door's cat through the fence for a long time. Went for a long walk near the Thames but was not allowed in as the fishermen were allowed to be there, barked at them too but they did not go away. Chased balls thrown for other dogs. Punter mum went out, left with punter dad who eventually took me on a long walk where I could discover deer in the bracken and lots of mud in the stream. Back for another 40 second meal. Punter mum returned, climbed on her lap and snoozed for next 4 hours. Then bed for 9 hours, hard life.

Today started badly when I was doing my morning inspection along the fence line and I got too close. Nasty zap and I howled (the cat says I squealed like a girl, memo to self: chase cat twice today) as I hotfooted it for the deck. Scoffed brekky in record time, played with my favourite ropey while mum got ready to face the day, chased the cat (tick) then headed to doggy day care to play with my besties all day. Dog tired when mum picked me up but I still managed to stare at people in cars next to us as we sat in traffic on the way home, raced in to tell the cat all about my day, had a snooze before scoffing dinner in record time then chased the cat (tick, that'll learn him) and now lounging on the couch while mum sips wine. Tomorrow = rinse and repeat sans the nasty zap. Life is good!

Today is a Late Walk Day
To entertain myself I have been taking my hard rubber frog onto My Sofa and dropping it on the wooden floor, jumping off to get it as it rumbles away, then back up again. I think mum is really pleased with my initiative, she keeps sighing proudly and staring at me with lovingly narrow eyes

Yesterday I was allowed to go to work in the van! It was so exciting because I am hardly ever allowed to go to work! Dad even managed to put my seatbelt on all on his own for the first time ever. I was so impressed!

I sat in the van for ages until a tall man said I was allowed in his garden. He was so nice that I ran over to him to say hi. Even though I'm normally really scared of men. I ran and ran in circles and the old boy, Monty, didn't like all of my running. He just looked at me and barked. Dad said I was a loon and then put me in the van because I decided to scratch at the door to look inside. He says I shouldn't scratch customers nice wood doors.

On the way home, I saw a cat in the road so I tried to jump out of the van window. Dad grabbed my seatbelt and did the window up which was very unfair. I heard Dad tell Mum that he's glad I have a seatbelt.

I then slept all evening and refused to get up to go for a walk. Mum said that I should walk more because I'm nearly three but I like to sleep too much.

I was annoyed when she took me out this morning so I stopped and sniffed every single leaf so that it took ages to get to the top of the field. Mum said it took so long that we couldn't go any further. That's fine for me because it's time for another nap!

I'm not allowed in dad's van. Apparently I'm too "shot to bits" to go out with him

I am trying to narrow down the photos I want to use for the Kennel Club competition. I think I have narrowed down most of them but I have two that I could use in the same category, I like them both and I can't decide which one. Then I shall take the buggers dogs for a good long walk in a vain effort to wear them out.

Whoops! Didn't RTT very well did I? Sorry . Will update properly later.

Another day at doggy day care today, charging around like a crazy thing (they say). Special surprise at home time, my dad picked me up today = yay!! Very tired after playing hard out two days in a row so I had a half-hearted play with dad and all of my toys then repaired to the couch. Managed to peel myself off the couch for dinner, then back to the couch. Still on the couch. And when I stretch right out no-one else can fit on the couch. Domination of the couch = tick!