God this is hard, trying not to get upset

[Notonaschoolnight]

Slept in kitchen first night last night with new pup and it went ok, tonight I'm in the hall next to the kitchen with the door open so she knows I'm there she's howled and cried the last 1hr45 pooed in the pen which I've cleared up but the smell is still in the air I've took her out but she did nothing but try to get my attention . If I could pay someone who knew what they were doing to sit with me right now and tell me what I'm doing wrong/right I'd hand over the money gladly. Don't get me wrong i didn't expect anything else I just doubt myself on how I'm handling it

don't be so hard on yourself - it's bloody hard! I look after 14 wk old pup for a week and was having a meltdown at the end of it! Don't forget that she is so young, she doesn't know what she's supposed to do and when either, like a newborn baby, but one that doesn't unfortunately wear a nappy. It might be worth trying to sleep with her on the sofa, she might just be missing her family and feel cold/alone/confused. Again, I would try it, I don't think it means you'll have to sleep downstairs with her forever (!) she just needs a bit of warmth and contact. Just try and take her out to have a pee/poo regularly during the day, treat and praise when she does something outside. It is 24/7 for the first weeks. You have to have eyes in the back of your head to catch her whenever she looks like she might be about to do something, circling the same spot or starting to squat. You WON'T be able to catch it every time, so don't feel bad when it happens. You will find lots of threads on the Doghouse with the same story as you, it's hard and you just have to get through it the best you can... btw, what sort of dog is it and where did you get it from?

She's a wheaten 22 min of quiet now but can I hell think about sleep

How old is she? I'm sure you're doing great, it just feels a bit much! I hope you are both nice and warm, we've snow here - I hope you can close your eyes for a bit - she'll soon let you know if she needs you!

Have you got anything from her previous home that smells of mum? You may find that wrapping a hot stone or warming a puppy safe soft toy on the radiator and settling her with it helps her - is this the first time she's had to sleep alone? (even though you are outside) being able to snuggle up to a warm 'body' will be a comfort. Some people advocate wrapped clocks as the ticking is soothing and reminiscent of the heartbeats they are used to - but all mine have been chewers! Did they start with house training before she left? A puppy that has got used to leaving a pen to poo may be trying to do that but not everyone does it. A change in routine can be daunting for babies, did they give you a run down? Keeping to feeding/toileting times at first can be helpful.

It is hard. See my thread! I've had my puppy for nearly 4 weeks and It's very up and down. She woke me at 4.45 am, settled a bit, but there was no way I could go back to sleep. Very tired. It must get better!

Thank you for your kind words. Unknowingly when I'd posted I'd ridden out the storm as straight after she did sleep till 3 I took her out them she slept till 545. She has a snuggle safe heat pad and a blanket from home with her in her crate and within her pen the paper was wet in places so she obv had a few wees and I must have slept a bit more as I didn't hear them. So she went out when she woke came in and with 5 mins did a poo on the kitchen floor but heigh ho we both got through the night now we have my first morning at work to contend with. I haven't org doggy care as its 9 to 12 term time only so I'm hoping well manage this over the months but there's only this week till half term and if she hasn't managed ill org paid care to come in from after half term. Today it's a puppy kong with a smear of primula, a toy and a nylabone . I may reheat the snuggle safe and leave her blanket in too then all I can do is cross fingers she manages

Sorry you had a hard night.

3 hours is hugely too long to leave a new puppy though, even for a week. The puppy needs security and 3 hours will seem like forever. She'll also need the toilet several times in that period.

I'm no expert but for the first couple of weeks we had our puppy in a box next to the bed. When she whimpered I put my hand in so she knew I was there, obvs taking her out a few times to wee etc when it could be that making her wake

She soon settled in and we had no problem moving her box back to the kitchen once she was more secure and confident

I think it's a bit like a newborn. It's all so new for them. I'm always happy to indulge initially until they're bigger and deal with any problems once they're in a better place to deal with change

Has always worked well for us, both with pets and babies :)

We have a 16 week old Springer, it is hard so I understand.

DH did the same as you, slept downstairs and slowly moved further away over a few nights. We were lucky with toilet training, it's been rare that he's needed to go in the night.

3 hours does seem a long time to leave her immediately, would the breeder not have kept her until half term? We timed it so we got our puppy over the Christmas break and someone was home for nearly 3 weeks before he was left for any length of time. During that period, we just ensured we kept popping out of the room and back in etc etc and built up the time.

He's fine being left now but I do think he was secure before he did get left iyswim?

Good luck - it is a touch over whelming to start with!!

3 hours is definitely too long to leave a puppy. When I bred pups, at 6 weeks to 8, they would play with litters siblings for 2 hours and then sleep for 2 hours. Being alone now is such a traumatic change.
Some dogs are needier than others even of the same breed.
It will get better. How old is she now?

She's 9 weeks tomorrow I do hear what you're all saying I'm giving it thought and talk it through with my husband later. Just out of interest what age would you say they could manage 3 and a bit hours?

So happy! My father in law has dropped off a load of newspaper and said hell come in at 10ish every day to let her out etc what a superstar I'm so relieved

Mine would be able to do that now I think but I would have given him a big walk, play, training, toilet etc so I know his needs are realistically met even if I feel guilty!

I worked from home in the main and limited trips to the office, at fort popping in for an hour (travel is twenty mins each way too). Slowly extended this sp last week was just a touch under three hours. Twice a week.

Caveats being he's toilet trained and likes his crate!!

I think I am pretty soft though to be honest, he would be fine for longer!!

That's good news. Honestly, I'd say my puppy was several months old before I'd leave him 3 hours, and even now at a year old I don't like to leave him more than 4 hours. He dances with joy and excitement, doing a tour of victory after just 10 minutes, so how he'd be if I left him so long, I don't know!

Cross post good stuff and bloody phone again lol!!!

Korma I was pretty much going to do what you said tonight anyway. In the wheaten new puppy handbook it sugg either have dog upstairs but I didn't really want to keep everyone awake or the other way what I'm doing night 1 with pup, night2 a bit away with door open and night 3 not visible at all to pup, so I don't know whether to try and sleep in my bed or sleep on the settee I'm just worried that I'm so tired already getting out of bed at 12 and 3 will be a lot harder than getting off the settee especially as our back door is in the living room. I'm right that's what your saying shut the door and go to bed apart from at those times?

Korma - ok will do and the extending? how long would u go before you tried to put it back an hour?

I must be a really mean owner. I have never stayed with any of my puppies over night
They go in the crate when we go to bed and that's it. They get let out at 7am. My Springer was the worst, he barked and howled for 4 hours the first night, 2 hours the second night and then slept through from then on.
I have a 4 month old Shih Tzu cross and he goes through from about half 10 till 7.

I would shut the door and go to bed till morning!

Actually that post sounds like I have lots of dogs all squashed in a crate together
Only the puppy is in the crate the older dogs are loose

OP
Your pup is still very young - still a baby. Needs to be charging around being played with for 2 hours and then will sleep for 2 hours. Much too young to be just walking on a lead. A pup that age needs to play to strengthen its muscles as by 9 months old it will be sexually mature. A wheaton has a lot of growing to do. But right now she needs company, attention and play.
It depends on the dog when you can leave them for 3+ hours on their own. Generally not until they are adults imo.
Good Luck.

Thanks korma will set my alarms in a bit