gabsid it is good that now you realise the breeder you visited is not a good one and have therefore decided not to have this puppy. Not only does this mean you can find the right dog for your family, but it also means that you are not encouraging poor welfare practices (even if these puppies appeared well looked after, someone who doesn't even know about health checks/tests is not in a knowledgable enough position to be breeding without seriously putting their bitch at risk) and a repeat of this breeding.
It will be extremely hard to find an ethical breeder of cockapoos. I would argue that there can't be any, because there is no need to be breeding crossbreeds at the moment when so many dogs are being killed every day. (did you know that over 25,000 dogs int he UK are killed every year due to lack of homes? Healthy dogs, no behavioural problems for the most part?) However, that aside, if you do feel you wish to proceed, the minimum things you should be looking for are:
- the bitch is over two years of age. Any younger than this and the bitch is not mature enough physically or mentally to have a litter. You also don't really know how they will turn out until they are mature.
- the stud dog should be at least two years old, it is impossible to properly 'judge' what a dog will be like until they are fully grown.
- parent dogs should both be KC registered (this is the only way to even start to verify their parentage and that there has been no inbreeding etc) and their papers must not be endorsed 'not for breeding'.
- Stud dog and bitch should have have appropriate health tests. This is not a 'health check' at the vets. It means specialist testing at a vet specifically qualified to do these tests and for the cocker spaniels and poodles these include eye testing and hip scoring as the bare minimum. There will be certificates showing the results and they should be under the BMS for each breed in the case of hip scoring. You can find more information on hip scoring and other tests on the BVA website.
- The bitch should not have had a litter in the last year, preferably longer and four is the absolute maximum number of litters any bitch should have. I personally think three is pushing it though.
- the bitch should have been wormed from day 42 of her pregnancy to protect the puppies from having a heavy worm burden when they are born.
- the puppies should be regularly wormed with the breeder from either 2 or 3 weeks (it depends on what brand of wormed is used) and this should be with a proper wormer from a vets, not a supermarket/pet shop brand.
- puppies should be weaned onto a good quality diet, this excludes brands such as pedigree, bakers or cheaper brands.
- puppies should be either born and reared in the house with some time outside if the weather is suitable or spend a length of time in the house each day. You want a pet dog to live in your house and as such any puppy you get should have been socialised to household sounds, sights and smells from a very young age.
- the puppies should have been checked over by the breeder's vet. However, the breeder should still encourage you to take your puppy to be checked by your own vet within the first few days after you take them home.
- the puppies should be microchipped or tattoed. They may be vaccinated, not all good breeders do this, but if they don't they must have a very good reason. (I personally do not vaccinate as I prefer the first vaccine to be at 9 weeks, it has nothing to do with money!)
- the puppy should come with 6 weeks free insurance, some of the food it has been on at the breeders, written information regarding diet, how to exercise your puppy, worming etc and may or may not come with various other things in a 'puppy pack'. (as am example I include a copy of 'The Perfect Puppy' by Gwen Bailey and a couple of other books, some toys etc and also send each puppy home with a blanket and toy or hot water bottle cover that the new owner brought to me a few weeks earlier, so these have the smell of the litter when they go home)
- the breeder should insist that at any time in the dog's life you cannot keep it you must return it to them and should not rehome it yourself. This applies whether the dog is 6 months or 16 years. They should also be available for telephone advice once you take your puppy home and should also be experienced enough to be able to give advice.
There are loads of other things, but research as much as you can. This dog will be your pet for the next 15 years or so, it's vital to get the right dog now.
Also, do you really think there's a huge difference in looks of the dogs posted on the previous page? I personally don't think there is. You cannot tell from a puppy reliably what coat it will have as an adult, their coats are very different once they shed out their puppy coat. Personally I feel you will get what you are after, including looks, from a poodle, they don't have to be clipped to look ridiculous (ok, that's my opinion only! 
) Although, I wouldn't get so fixated on looks you're prepared to compromise in other areas to get the puppy you want.
Do be prepared to wait. The chances of any good breeder having pups ready to view and choose now are very small. You are likely to have to go on a waiting list whatever dog you choose.
Also, don't rule out a rescue dog. There are large numbers of older puppies in rescue. nothing at all wrong with them, they're just not so cute anymore!