Dog really hates toddler DS

[TheHolyGruel]

I have posted about this before. I have two dogs (staffs) and a toddler DS who is 20mo.

My older dog (male) really dislikes my DS. He growls at him constantly and it is just getting worse. We had problems with this dog being dog aggressive but this has been overcome somewhat by walking him on a muzzle and walking the dogs separately. The dog has been checked by a vet, other than a recent worm problem (now sorted) there is nothing wrong.

We sought advice from a dog trainer/rescue person who we had a couple of sessions with. His advice re the toddler/dog situation was to put the dog down, as if something did go wrong then not only would it be a dreadful situation for us, but dreadful for staffies everywhere (another story for the papers etc, another crack in the BSL nonsense defence - I fully believe that BSL is bollocks and that the problem is not because he's a staff, but I'll talk about that in a moment). But I don't feel I can do it. In the meantime, any attempts to unite dog and DS are failing. DS is instructed to offer dog treats, to sit nicely and pet nicely, not to run up to dog, not to touch anything belonging to dog, etc. I make an effort for the dogs to be in the same room as DS as often as possible, but I am becoming worried for DS safety, as dog is really sounding at the end of his rope.

I honestly believe it is because the dog has been usurped from his position of 'first born'. The other dog displays no such issues, and is very fond of DS. The problem dog has always been the established top dog.

DH works away from home sometimes and has his biggest stint of the year coming up next month. He is away for a month, and I am petrified of how I will cope with this situation alone. It is so stressful.

In the first instance, does anyone know of a way in which I could find a foster carer for my dog, initially for this upcoming period, or is this unrealistic? He is fine with dogs smaller than himself and with older children (all children aside from DS it seems, in fact).

Can anyone offer any other advice or solutions? I think ultimately he will need rehoming, but I also know it's not that simple...

Oh is that was the dog is communicating tulips

So how do you know that?
And given that the dog hates the child so much, why hasnt he attacked yet? Because you are clearly a dog expert arent you?

I'm sure you have had many different breeds of dogs, rescue dogs etc.

Fgs Tulips will you stop flaming op, why don't you come up with ideas on how best to re-home if you are such an expert!!
An expert wouldn't insist the dog is put down.
Op i hope you find a loving home for him, there will be one out there, have you tryed asking any of your family/friends that are childless whether they could have him?
Newspaper ads?
Facebook selling pages?-you will be able to see who has him then
National Dogs Trust?
Advert put in a shop

You are doing your very best to look at your ds interests and your dog's don't take no notice of these pts posts
Aslong as you are keeping them separated, for now that is acceptable until you find an alternitive

Oh no! please don't sell him, the only people who will pay any money for a dog who is known to be aggressive and dangerous around young children, are those who want to use it as, well, an intimidating dog? (queue here some hoodies, big chains and possible a bit of a dog fighting scene).

I do think that dog needs counseling, but I have not the faintest clue about who will be willing to pay for it. Reading this thread is making me afraid of rehoming a dog again (and that comes from someone who spent hundreds of pounds in dog training to rehabilitate a rescue dog). It is my view that the dog will go to someone who thinks the problem can be fixed with just a bit of 'love'.

People who are saying have the dog pts are not some knee-jerk rabid animal haters.

I am a vegetarian, because I am against unnecessary killing of animals. But in this case, OP knows her dog is acting aggressively towards baby. A trainer who has seen the dog recommends the pts option.

OP is seriously stressed and probably racked with guilt. The humane and responsible thing to do for everyone involved, the child, OP and the dog is to have animal pts. It is a very hard decision and OP will need a lot of support. Trivialising the situation and demonising those who suggest that the dog pts are not helping the OP, just putting more of their judgemental burden on her.

I didn't mean 'sell' i meant advertise him in the places i have mentioned

The effect is the same, it just goes, potentially, to a wider audience of not very desirable owners.

As was explained up thread, advertising attracts a lot of people for the wrong reason.

Oh fgs
Get rid of the dog!
Your ds should come first!

I don't think anyone with experience of rescue dogs will think the dog can be fixed with a bit of love.

However, dogs with behaviour problems can be helped.

Like I said before, I'm quite sure everyone would have advised me to have my dogs PTS, when I rescued them each one had different problems, and it was hard work to train and socialise them. But we did.

I'm finding the rescue puppy a lot easier now, he was abandoned at 8 weeks because the idiot that bought him thought he could be toilet trained in a day, and left alone from 7am-5pm with no problems.

He had the puppy for a week and then dumped him in a box outside the shelter with a note saying "Im sorry I can't keep him, he is shitting all over my flat and the neighbours are complaining he is crying from 7-5. I tried to take him to the person I bought him from but he won't give me my money back. Just give him to someone or put him down. What a waste of £300."

This is why rescue homes are full of unwanted puppies.

"Right, exactly what my dear cousin says about his GS who is inceadibly kind with children but hates other dogs. Unfortunately for their neughbours, cousin's dog has killed 6 dogs in the neighbourhood on the 10 years they have had it. This kind of stories only make the news in the UK."

Wow, how irresponsible of them, that dog is clearly not in the right environment.

Yes growling is a form of communucation. The dog is saying it hates the child and if allowed near enough would no doubt attack the child.

Tulips, there are lots of different ways dogs growl, meaning lots of different things. The fact that the dog has been around this child for 20 months without attacking the child suggests it has good impulse control and is trying to avoid that. However, I do agree it is possible that if 'pushed' that the dog could attack the child, but that situation could easily be avoided.

OP, I have to say, I understand that you do not want to keep the dog shut away, but unless you can avoid a situation where the dog feels the need to growl at your DS, then I think it is wise to keep the dog and your son completely seperate. A dog shut away is no worse than a dog under stress because it's unhappy with a situation and if your dog did decide it had had enough and it did bite your son, aside from the fact your son could be badly hurt, where would that leave the dog?

actually it is all about the 'top dog nonsense' i had my dog (lab) at a behavourist and thats exactly what it is! he's threatened by his 'place' in the pack! my dog thankfully was/is never aggressive towards dd just me i was told it was because he felt i was comprimising his place in the pack and he wasnt aggressive towards my dd cos he didnt se her as a threat...yet! i know a 20mnth cant really do any of this but i was told to do everything with the dog! feed him, walk him, brush him etc cos at the moment he was my husbands dog not a family dog! maybe your dog feels towards your ds cos he is no longer the centre of your attention (and rightly so ofcourse)
i would keep them seperated but when you are doing things with the dog have ds with u so he see's him as a good thing!
i wudnt let ds do it on his own as it only takes a split second and he will have to live with it the rest of his life!
goodluck x

Lilybean - Id be asking for a refund!

Midori, that's just nuts.
Yes, growling means a lot of things - all of them signalling that something needs to be removed from the situation quickly. The dog doesn't have good impulse control. It doesn't like big dogs and can't stop itself growling and snarling at a particular person.

Hairy, you're flailing - that's why you keep on going off topic.

Lemarch, even childless couple or people will come across other small children and big dogs.

I agree with you there Lemarch, that was exactly it with my dog. She just didnt know where she stood with DS as one minute hed be nice and calm not paying the dog any attention at all, the next tottering about trying to go after her doing his half cry/half laugh noise. think adults and older kids do give off a more calming 'air' so the dog feels more at ease. Although she loves cuddling up next to the baby comparing the size of her stomach to the size of the baby wondering if she will be able to 'down in one' obviously

Where is the dh in all of this? He must have seen the dog's behaviour.

erm.....LBY you must be getting me confused with another poster. The only flailing and backpeddling Ive seen aint been from me

Hmm, I didn't mention backpeddling.

I'd say the dogs impulse control is pretty good, given its been growling at the child for nearly 2 years. Or could that possibly point to the dog not actually growling because he wants to attack the child, but rather something else.......

I know you didnt LBY, I mentioned it, in that post above ^