21 kids and counting

[thannyflaps]

Just watching the latest episode - how on earth do they afford to run that household? iPhones for the kids, holidays to Spain for 20 people, a new kitchen.

There is no way a bakery would generate that much money. Would channel 4 really pay that well for their participation in the programme?

Thanny Flaps

They are managing the best they can with 21 kids, it is not neglectful by SS standards and a lot of families without these numbers of kids have that standard of care, the kids have their basic needs met, but they do not have their psychological needs met. Especially the amount of time that is spent with each child, and the reluctance of the parents for the adult children to be independent and fly the nest, it just seems very posessive.

Noel really does not sit right with me, he comes across as quite controlling actually, yes Sue does go along with it, as that is all she has known for most of her life. It is sad, it is their choice, they need now to focus on their family, away with the filming, and no more babies. They also both need professional help separately.

Plus I met my husband at 18 (he was 28) and we are literally soul mates. Yes if I was a few years younger it would have been very wrong but it wouldn’t change the fact that we were meant to be together in a few years

Ooh I think some of the Radfords are on here

I've never seen any of these Radford docu things before, so I watched the Benidorm one on catch up just now, purely because I read this thread and wanted to see what all the hoohaa was about.

I don't think the kiddie was freaking out over 'rice' as a PP said, but rather because one of the party deliberately threw a massive scary looking prawn onto his plate, under his nose! It wasn't funny.

I felt very sorry for the wife driving that bus full of DC late at night/early hours, lost in a strange country, driving on the 'wrong' side of the road. God knows how many hours she'd been up anyway, packing, sorting kids etc. And massively pregnant. I don't understand why she even agreed to go on holiday at that stage in her pregnancy. She could have/should have said no. I wonder who's idea the kitchen refit was too.

I don't think the father came across as abusive really. He seemed quite softly spoken and very patient.

But, like I say, I've only seen this one episode.

How can they not care about the children’s education? Maybe a the children are very bright. It seems unusual none would struggle with homework and need extra help with something. Do any of them play instruments or have hobbies? Go to maths club or drama or have a life outside of being in a big family? I’d be so anxious if they were mine in what each would do in adulthood and how I could help them achieve their dreams. It would be all consuming.

Never given a young child a lemon and giggled with them?

Giggled at them. And no. I’ve seen those videos where people give their babies a lemon and laugh hysterically at their screwed up faces. Fucking disgusting. Why would you do that? You know lemons are sour and babies won’t like them. Why do you need to see their faces? Can’t you get your kicks in a normal way?

Nope, call me boring but I never gave my babies lemons and then laughed at them filming them. Maybe because I don’t have the mentality of the average 8 year old and can find pleasure in my children without publicly upsetting them

I'm certainly no Radford !!

OK. We'll just agree to disagree and I don't want to make it personal at all potatoscone

But I don't agree with some of these comments and I understand why they may have been zapped in the past, although I never read them.

I think the whole Bold comments thing tends to just irritate me in general tbh. It makes me feel I'm being schooled but yeah, it's the Mumsnet way I suppose.

Looneytunes, no things were NOT very different then.

Sue is, what, 43? I am in my 60's and no way was it common for a 13 year old girl to have a 17 year old boyfriend. It also was far from common for a 13 year old to get pregnant. I don't know of any girls that young in my school, my sister's school or my brother's school who got pregnant at that age. Nor in my neighbourhood.

A girl did get pregnant at my school at 15 and everyone was shocked and horrified. She was talked about a lot (and not in a good way) and called some awful names.

My cousin got a girl pregnant when they were both at school aged 15. He got expelled. That was about 50 years ago.

I used to admire them but it seems their obsession to add to the brood is now completely making the older ones fed up. It isn't fair on the others now and I do hope this is their last baby for the childrens sake

I'm sorry bring I have no idea what you are talking about. I have not had any comments zapped?

You posted to me and called me a few names. I have literally never called any posters on this thread anything. I point that out and you have a go at me for using the forum as it was supposed to be used? I respond to that and you post something about comments being zapped? That's never happened to me. I never made anything personal, I never had a post deleted and I use Mumsnet correctly.

There isn't much there to 'agree to disagree about'

I'm sorry but if you take offence to the Mumsnet way, then perhaps Mumsnet isn't for you?

Sue isn't that much older than me. All this "things were different " is nonsense.

And there is a massive difference between people trying to make the best of a situation they have found themselves in. Job losses, illness, contraception failure, disability etc and actively contributing to a situation when you already can't cope and your older ones are picking up the slack.

He already had a vasectomy once. They specifically planned to have more kids . It was a conscious decision knowing full well what the outcome would be.

They chose to dilute what little time and energy they had left even more. They chose not to help themselves with counselling or whatever but to keep breeding with zero regard for the kids they already have even though she's been advised to have no more by Drs ffs. That's a choice. And yes an abusive one.

*You totally ARE missing the point.

This isn't about he child being upset about the food. It's about the Radford family setting the child up, to be upset and distressed, whilst filming it on a mobile phone.*

But they didn't set one child up, the cameras were rolling anyway and this is obviously the usual noisy chaotic undisciplined meal time that the Radford kids are used to.

Fuck me, 21 kids all rammed into one house with only two parents to oversee all the relentless sibling rivalry, teasing and bullying that would inevitably go on. These radford kids will grow up to be very hardy tolerant and probably resentful.

The child in question wasn't distressed he was reacting to a prawn on his plate that all the other kids also had on their plates-- . They were filming because they had never ever had paella or big prawns before.--

Nope not a radford either

But they didn't set one child up, the cameras were rolling anyway

There were indeed. And that is how we got to see what happened. They knew the child would be distressed. The giggled about it beforehand, they filmed it on a mobile, and they sleighed about it dieting and afterwards.

If it was just a case of catching a child being upset because the cameras were rolling anyway, that would be different. This was a deliberate act intended to give them a laugh at someone's upset.

Ignore the strike through, not sure why it did that.

*laughed during and afterwards

No idea where the sleigh cane from

Someone said before about them limiting the size of their family if the sponsorships fell through. I honestly don't think it would and the children would fall into worse times. These mega families in US are often very poor and rely on donations from people for food, medical care, maternity services and other basic needs, yet they still have more. They are motivated religiously which isn't the case in the Radfords but I'm sure everyone would agree it is more than 'loving a big family' (and even Sue said before it is an addiction) They aren't thinking rationally or considering the others when they decide to have another.

I remember reading here or on Babycentre about Sue taking multiple pregnancy tests way before her period was due. That sounds very odd to me, it isn't a case of 'we'll just let nature take it's course' she seems to be desperately TTC within a month of giving birth and cannot wait for a missed period to find out. I really do think she needs help.
This program did not show them in the best light and I hope for the children's sake that we don't see them again on TV. My house was never a show home and always a bit chaotic but it really did seem like their management of younger children was purely crowd control.

Of course that kid was set up! They deliberately zoomed in on him no doubt because they knew he was the kid who’d react the ‘best’ for telly. Same as how the Chloe cake making charade was set up. And the poor toddler sat in the fridge.
Dearie me some people must be really naive if they think this is all a totally normal level of filming genuine family events and just happening to capture those moments

I just watched because of this thread. I highly disapprove of the family being so big but, having watched, I didn’t think it was anywhere near as bad as people said. The examples of people screeching, babies crying all the time and the dad being mean (bar the sat nav) just not as bad.

I thought the younger kids seemed very young for their age, but the older ones seemed pretty grounded. I worry about the overly made up girl - think she will end up on reality TV or something off the back of this. I wasn’t convinced the dad seemed particularly controlling. Both parents just seemed a bit... Childish? They are a similar age to me but I couldn’t imagine finding any common ground.

What was odd was that they just went on and on about treasuring the moment they bring a new baby home. That seemed to be the thing they were addicted to. They didn’t go on about any other milestones - just introducing the new one to the brood.

There is definately a similar theme to the duggars amongst all this.

Although they don't home school. But there is still a very sinister underlying theme of removing as much possibility to outside influences as possible. The lack of support for education. Noel doing the driving instruction. No extra curricular activities. Working in the bakery.

They just haven't been able to see life outside of the family. They are "needed" too much at home . And arebt encouraged to become well read enough or smart enough to realise the whole bloody thing isn't normal.

I agree Gerryblewup that is the impression I got, it is very sad and troubling. The older children had little or no aspiration, probably because they knew that when they left school they would be working in the pie shop. There really is very little of the children going out with friends, doing what normal kids do, gaining independence, going to college, uni, moving out. It is like them want them there at home where they can see them. Very sad.

I'm one of 9 and husband one of 11 () believe me, being one of many is NOT good in many ways. Yes there are some benefits such as company but there are many many negatives.