Have we hit THE WALL yet? It's SLEB MASTERCHEF Part 3

[Halsall]

Shiny new thread

icklboo
I gonna think up a punchline to that.

The Twat the Luvvie and the Giant all went for a stroll one day, happily chatting they didn't realise they were being followed by a strange individual, he was a hairless short sighted creature who favoured carrying a spoon.........

next

'Oooooo's that trip trappin over me buttery biscuit base?' snarled the creature. 'I smells chocklit'.

I know I know and it's not witty , but I enjoy this programme despite Greg. How on earth is he paid to be the speaking clock and then just look like he is going to take all the uneaten food back to his dressing room and finish it off. I know I am late to the party but seriously what does he really add to this. ( I am saying this here as DH is fed up of me saying Oh do get off greg to the TV)

I'd like the huge rugby player to win

seriously what does he really add to this

NOTHING!!!!

He adds NOTHING to anything he is on.

His only purpose on God's good earth is to serve as an object of loathing. He is beyond unspeakable. Cockroaches shrink from his approach and sewer rats refuse to catch his eye in case he tries to engage them in light conversation.

I was just saying to DH last night that I could never be on this programme because putting me in the same room as Gregggggg and sharp knives would not end well. For Gregggggg.

(Of course, no jury would convict me - I would demand a jury of my peers (MNers) and doubtless the verdict would be that it was the worst case of suicide they had ever seen.

I would walk free from court to a huge accolade and a cutted up pear served on a silver platter.

To be honest, I quite like ripping the piss out Gregg. I find it quite cathartic.

Schaden

I recorded last night, so was on delayed watch back, so won't bore everyone with extremely late comments. Suffice to say, Spencer has extremely hairy arms - wish he'd wear a long sleeved shirt; loved the way Eric Lanlard pronounced "scone"; John is looking more like an unhinged psycho killer by the minute (and why is he wearing a kilt?); obvs want Martin to win; and how can it be that the greengrocer can continue to be even more obnoxious than before? He really is sinking to previously unknown depths!

I am out tonight, folks - so I won't be able to join you. I look forward to all of your comments. though.

Not sure if being sociable in public is worth the price I have to pay, but there you go.

ScahdenfreudePersonified "Cockroaches shrink from his approach and sewer rats refuse to catch his eye in case he tries to engage them in light conversation." Ha ha - after my own heart.

I would give you a character reference should slipping on a jus result in Greg being mercifully removed from our television screens.

Really - there must be people out there who like him or is it just inertia. Surely someone ( please ) could add more to the programme than he. DS & I are building a rocket in our heads where we send people to go and colonise another planet. We're up to Greg Wallace and Tess Daly thus far.

Can we add Phillip Schofield and Jacob Rees-Mogg to the rocket, please, Basilisk? Also Dianne Abbott. And Boris Johnson. And Giles Coren.

But I don't think they should be allowed to colonise another planet - the thought of them breeding out there, in the innocence of the unpolluted universe is very distressing. Can they not just orbit the furthest sun we can send them to until they are just a lot of whitened bones in spacesuits?

Schaden Re orbit until whitened bones - That would just be cruel. I think , whatever we think of these people , colonising another planet is more humane

However, I can see that 1) The spaceship may have to be bigger and 2) we may have to form an orderly queue. I think I may shove Dianne Abbott toward the front , because in space no one can hear that whispery voice.

I think by the end of the final of Masterchef I may be reserving a place for actor John. I am sure he is an actor but perhaps he should take a tip from Michael Kitchen - understated is usually good.

Ha ha Schaden

I like this game! Can I add:

Andi Peters
Christine Hamilton
William Sitwell

Gregg Wallace is obviously the founder member of Dicks In Space

Shall we put Jonty in for continuing to work with Gregg?

Oh and how could I forget Ulrika Johnson?

Also please can I pack Thomasina Myers's bags for her?

Apologies for any mis spelling btw.

Evening all

Evening all. Come on Big Guy!!

Evening!

Oooooooooooooo Marcus again. I have come over all unnecessary

Mmmm Marcus

God he is such a prat isn't he!!

I never get tired of seeing Spencer repeatedly burn himself

I do love him though.

We're going to need a bigger rocket.

Evening!

His Mrs seems OK though

Oh my good god he’s hagrid

Ahhhh lovely Martin

I'd really like him to win but I don't think he will

I really hope he will win.

He's so lovely.