most irritating kids tv programmes/ characters?

[purpleperilandpeanut]

Just wondering if I am alone in feeling irrationally annoyed by some of the tv programmes DS loves to watch? Dora makes me want to throw bricks at my telly, similar feelings arise whenever Boj or Everything's Rosie come on. What does it for you?

I have disturbing memories of something called Higgleytown Heroes which my son used to watch about 10 years ago. It was nauseatingly smug and extremely dull, with lots of moralising.

Baby jake is the worst of the lot. DD reverts to baby talk every time she watches it.

My son is currently watching Bubble Guppies. It's gibberish. They're fish in an underwater nursery, then they're flying a helicopter, suddenly they're flying from Africa to Ohio to rescue some elephants, now the elephants are playing basketball.

And as for all the infernal singing! Which, despite a heavy dose of auto tune, is entirely tune-free.

Agreeing with all of you on Balamory. I was so hoping the Scots would vote yes so I wouldn't have to watch that dross again. And Me Too. I haven't the foggiest what's going on half the time and the theme tune is never ending and by it's conclusion can only be heard by dogs.

DD is currently into Cloudbabies and requests it continually. At least the Baby Jake obsession is now at an end.

Fortunately I have had no experience of Topsy and Tim, good job too as the trailers make me seethe and want to turn to the

The Little Princess is grim. Always hated the books, hate her voice even more. Coincidentally it's the same voice actor that does the voices for Dennis The Menace on CBBC which I loathe more than hell pains. Horrible fake child, fake 'Northern' fake cheery crap. I hate it when adult actors do the voices for children on TV. I banned the Tweenies because of it. Well, that was one of the 3646826 reasons.

Thank you for this hilarious thread! (am actually snorting out loud at some of the comments)

I feel bad being derogatory about two innocent children, but Topsy and fucking Tim make me want to break things. I've never actually watched an episode, the goddamn trailer repeated ad sodding nauseum is enough - "These look REALLY yummy!" "I'm so excited about school tomorrow!" Bleurgh, perky brats!!

Kerwhizz kids - just gaaah!!

WTF is Abney & Teal all about?! Why are they followed around by little turds on legs?? Why is there a giant talking turd in the lake???

Mr Maker is clearly coked up to his eyeballs and the dancing shapes give me the willies, especially the rectangle with its demonic slowed down voice.

The Tweenies can just fuck off. And Zingzillas. Whiny nobheads the lot of them.

I do like Sarah & Duck though, it's wonderfully weird

Just the adverts for Topsy and Tim drive me insane 'Welcome to our new HOME'. Fuck the fuck off you asshat.

Justin is on everything on cBeebies and bloody ruins it all.

Kerwizz is shite and baby Jake is freaky.

I also really miss Doodle Do. Chris didn't give a fuck on there and it made me laugh.

Barney the wank- bag dinosaur and that f'king puke enducing 'I love you, you love me' song. You don't even know me, you f'king purple bell end c**t.

As for Mike the Knight. 'Be a knight - do it right' Oh so you're advising I be a Knight are you? That'd work well in Roehampton wouldn't it? I'll start riding a horse to Morrison's in a suit of army should I? Prick!

And those irritating, idiotic, voices on Waybaloo make me want to sling a brick through the telly.

Tracy Beaker/Danni Harmer: why does she get her own programmes? Beaker was bad, but Danni's Castle was dire.

And every single child on the Sparticle Project - it's obvious that the adults are doing their damndest to keep the parallel universes apart.

I have older children.

My daughter loves bubble guppies. I also don't understand how they manage to sound out of tune when it's all autotuned. Tragically I sometimes find myself singing the songs when it's not even on. I really like abidas and quite enjoy singing along to the songs, sadly dd doesn't like it as much as me.

Someone on another thread said they had a theory that everyone in the little princess were really in a mental asylum it makes a lot of sense when you think about it!

I also can't bear Mr Bloom. The way he swaggers around with his groin slightly thrust forward. He so thinks all the mummies fancy him - but we don't. Oh no wedon't, you cocky little gobshite.

Iconacles thinks it's clever too. Don't think we haven't noticed!

I fancy Mr Bloom. He's doing it for me.

Resta mouse

grrr

All of us apart from meanandmeasley then

"Special Agent Arsehole" is what Oso is known as here.

And does anyone else think the theme tune to "Everything's Rosie" sounds like they are singing "arseing along"? (Presume it's "all sing along")

My dh looks so much like Mr Bloom my ds shouts 'daddy!' When he comes on t'telly.

Lola from Charlie and Lola is such a brat.

Topsy and Tim makes me reach for the vodka.

It's not Mr Blooms looks as such, more his swagger that puts me off him. I'm sure your dh is lovely meanandmeasly

I thought Mr Bloom looked quite shagworthy when he read the bedtime story as his real self Ben without that bloody hat. Was a little surprised that he's not a real northerner. Why pretend? Do they think no-one south of Birmingham does any gardening??

Early Tracy beaker
Norman price
Any fucker from icarly/Sam+cat/victorious et al

Most of these get my vote. But the majority of my loathing is reserved for a Channel5 charmer called Angels of Jarm. Or Angels of Fucking Jarm as it's known in our house (under the breath of course as daughter loved it). Religious programming for pre-schoolers, chock-full of the most horrendous religious stereotypes.

And The Beeps, also Channel 5. Not even Tom Baker can redeem it, not with a main character who aspirates an 'h' sound at the beginning of almost every word.

Kill them with fire.

Norman Price is a wee prick.

Max and sodding Ruby - leave your little brother alone to play and stop trying to coerce him into doing your self righteous prissy shit. And where's your parents?

Norman Price - little shit, needs an asbo or juvenile prison.

Olivia - a cartoon pig that's on really late, creepy as fuck and horrible faintly sinister theme tune, had the misfortune to fall asleep in front of the tv and wake up to it once

Dora STOP SHOUTING!!!! And yes go Diego, go. Preferably to the far side of fuck and then fuck off some more.

Lol, sorry Fox, didn't mean to make you feel awkward! I can totally understand there are parts of his demeanour that doesn't appeal to all. The talking out the side of his face bugs me! Let's just say he's referred to in my house as 'mummy's little treat'.