Channel 4 : My Violent Child

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on now

My DS is 11 with ASD and ADHD, he has fairly regular outbursts/meltdowns and can be aggressive. Tbh I just try and make sure he and I are safe. At school I have taught him that those feelings mean he needs to stomp off and rage...NOT hurt somebody. This helps at home too as he can scream and whack his pillow to his hearts content.
He can raise fists to me at times and does a half hearted slapping to my hands. I am under no illusion that this will just stop without a lot of input from me.
With regard to electronics, DS has an XBOX...the first thing he has ever owned which he loves. It also makes him "one if the boys" at school too. He cannot understand why I won't buy him Grand Theft Auto though. Lots of his friends have it but the last thing my child needs is a game which trivialises violence.

This programme is so sad. Not judging as haven't seen enough but a couple of things struck me:

• JJ's mum needs to leave him alone when having an episode. He was yelling at them to go away yet she continued to follow him in his room and try to physically restrain him which was clearly escalating the situation.

• Franklyn's mum needs to parent him. She seemed proud of the fact that he'd completed Grand Theft Auto - is that not an 18 rated game that shows physical and sexual violence?! There was also a moment when she shouted up the stairs 'if you don't stop; I'm going to come up and smack you'. Not an expert but I'm not sure that trying to tackle violence with violence is going to get you very far.

Perhaps I've read too much into it but strange incident with Brett.

Younger female child crying downstairs and Brett shouting up, 'I only wanted a hug' and Brett's mum going downstairs and scolding the younger child explaining he was only trying to be nice.

Not necessarily implying anything but I used to hate as a child being forced to give people hugs and kisses when I didn't want to, it's unfair.

Brett also needs to learn that he shouldn't force himself on people yet his mum handled that the wrong way (in my opinion).

The "lying on top of the child" method of restraining' calming down doesn't seem right to me.

I'd think they would need time to be angry, scream, shout, thrash about to get the anger out of their system rather than being restricted and bundled up in a duvet, unable to move.

Yes jj mum seems very in your face and controlling, he has even said she had a controlling upbringing as her dad was in the Army or something! Mabey that's the problem, jj needs time out on his own to cool down, and his mum has to give him the space to do that! Brett seemed to me like he could have SN as well.

I didn't think JJs mum was so bad, TBH.

Franklyns? GTA at 7? lets him watch eastenders when its all fighting and shouting and stuff?

his dad not bothering? sister laughing and no one helps? sorry, not much sympathy for that one, GTA I couldn't believe it. and proud of him for that? WTF?

my DC has similar outbursts but I never let her watch/listento/play anything innapropriate, yes it doesn't help she and I were victims of a violent abusive man and that's stayed with her, its just her and I now and shes taking it out on me, but I bring her up with Christian moral values, am strict but fair, never give in, and SS are looking into anger management for her, I know how to handle DC, just need that extra boost.

so sorry, but I really had my judgy pants on at that programme, why don't they ever show where nothing untoward is going on as theres always some sort of trigger and this programme showed why.

I know why mine has probs, and im now able to get help, the useless CAMHS were just that and didn't see a problem FFS.

Franklins mum was not good. She was most of tge problem!