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Original poster

Eastenders Baby Death Storyline

1392 replies

deemented · 28/12/2010 18:30

Once again, no one can live happily ever after

Ronnie's baby James, dies and she puts his body in Kat and Alfies son's crib, and steals their baby boy, Tommy.

Why oh why oh why do scriptwriters insist on portraying bereaved parents - mothers especially - as mad and deranged??? Maybe it's because they can't begin to imagine how awful the death of a child is, but really, whilst we are mad with grief, it is our own child that we want back, not someone else's stolen child. When are scriptwriters ever going to understand that?

Still, it'll be a riveting watch, no doubt.

OP posts:

shabbapinkfrog · 02/01/2011 20:34

Kitty - my son, Matty, was almost 8 years old....so I would say to mention the sons names, to tell them a funny memory you have of them, or just to say 'Is there anything I can help you with.' You cant make a bereaved Mum more sad than she already is xxx

travellingwilbury · 02/01/2011 20:35

potpourri It is hard when you can see someones eyes fill with tears but I know for me generally it was half tears of relief that someone had said the unmentionable thing . Honestly I bet she still remembers you saying it .

PotPourri · 02/01/2011 20:44

Yes shabba, the touching thing. Every part of me wanted to cuddle my friend, but then she's a new friend... And I suppose deep down I was also scared that she might break down, which would make me cry - which would feel out of order given that I haven't lost a child. It's hard.

Thanks for the reassurance trevellingwillbury. And shabba, thanks for saying 'you can't make a bereaved mum more sad than she is'. It's heartbreaking to know that, but also gives others more strength to talk about and say the child's name.

Secretwishescometrue · 02/01/2011 21:02

Oh my dear mumsnetters :( I am so so sorry so many of you here have gone through the unbelievably horrific nightmare of your precious child and children dying :( I know the tears iv shed reading through this thread at some of yer posts mean nothing but tonight you are all in my heart and I only wish I say something anything right that could possibly help in any way but I know nothing could... I am just truly so sorry for the loss of your little ones :( shame on EE just shame on them!

kittywise · 02/01/2011 21:06

Thank you shabba. I'm so sorry that Matty isn't with you, well in body. I'm sure his lovely spirit goes with you at all times.
Indeed to all you Mnetters who have suffered such terrible terrible losses, a huge hug, for what it's worth, but it's heart felt.

bettypage · 02/01/2011 21:09

I'm a big Eastenders fan but I was shocked by this story line. I've seriously gone off it now. It's wrong on so many levels. The BBC have alot of explaining to do. Not Happy.

peterpansmum · 02/01/2011 21:14

Folks always assume they will say something that will upset me ... How could anything upset me as much as my precious child dying? The most beautiful cards I received following my two year old son's death (of suspected cot death) were those who said his name and shared their specific memories of how he touched them and their lives. The friends who are not scared of my grief I will treasure forever.

Mouseface · 02/01/2011 21:23

PotPourri

I'm with deemented on this. People avoid you. They just don't know what to say.

My own sister announced her pregnacy (3rd child) on the first year anniversary of our triplets dying. She never missed a beat as she beamed at me.

When my friend lost her baby recently, 36 weeks, I 'knew' how she felt. But I didn't make it about me, some people do. To try to 'relate' to how you feel.

They share their losses/experiences with you to try and let you know that they have been hurt too.

Never in a spiteful way. It just comes out I think.

Personally, I just wanted people to talk to me. Grief isn't catching, talk to me. Hold me. Ask me what happened. I'll tell you.

PotPourri · 02/01/2011 21:34

Was that good or bad Mouse (your sister announcing her pregnancy)?

jugglingjo · 02/01/2011 21:44

Oh, definitely bad I think. But I wondered if she didn't realise it was exactly a year on.

DrewsGirl · 02/01/2011 21:47

I think people are overreacting by actually writing complaints to the bbc.

I am a new mum and must admit that during the night on nye after watching ee i checked my son a lot more than usual as it upset me but writers/producers need to make soaps as real as possible and cot death is real and so is kidnapping other peoples children.

jugglingjo · 02/01/2011 21:50

But you just said that it affected you personally in a pretty bad way. It upset you. You kept checking up on your newborn son all through the night.

People are not over-reacting in writing a note to the BBC to let their feelings be known !

LunaticFringe · 02/01/2011 21:51

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheManWhoSoldtheWorld · 02/01/2011 21:52

@ ^^

Just popped back to this thread and see that there are the usual considered responses.

LunaticFringe · 02/01/2011 21:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheManWhoSoldtheWorld · 02/01/2011 21:53

That was aimed at Drewsgirl, sorry x posts.

LunaticFringe · 02/01/2011 21:55

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

christmasrocks · 02/01/2011 21:55

DrewsMum, what a load of rubbish, hurtful rubbish, kidnapping other peoples children???? Think before you post

ClaireFromWork · 02/01/2011 21:57

I'm very uncomfortable with the storyline. I get the whole cot death thing but the baby stealing is perverse.

My friend's baby boy, named James, died of SIDS on New Years Eve a few years ago. I hope to god she wasn't watching.

supernoodlesrock · 02/01/2011 21:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

TheManWhoSoldtheWorld · 02/01/2011 21:59

I know Lunatic, obviously I am really crap at typing quickly and not being completely awful to you!

My God, I just think that some comments can't get any worse and something new comes up.

iwasyoungonce · 02/01/2011 22:03

I know that watching this would upset me, so I am not going to put myself through it. It is a digusting storyline.

I've just deleted the last few episodes (unwatched) from my SkyPlus planner, and I am never watching it again.

Just wanted to add my condolences to all the poor women on here who have lost children. It is just horrific.

How EE can try to pass this off as festive entertainment is beyond me. Shame on them.

PotPourri · 02/01/2011 22:03

Should people write the child's name on christmas cards, or just a little mention of them?

I often wonder, do you say you have 3 children or 2 (if one died)?

It's a minefield. I'm not meaning to offend btw. I want to get it right with people in the future.

Secretwishescometrue · 02/01/2011 22:04

Northernlebkuchen · 02/01/2011 22:06

Drewsgirl - have you actually read the thread? Soaps aren't real - and if they were then babynapping certainly shouldn't feature as it is incredibly rare. Your post and some of the others on this thread make me think that some people actually like watching heartbreakingly awful stuff - distracts them from their own lives. Of course people should complain - why on earth should they shut up about something so upsetting, offensive and damaging?

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