School Prom - outrageous expectations?

[SmellsLikeTeenSweat]

This is new territory for me. DD is 16, leaves school this year after GCSEs to go to college. The prom, in June, seems to be a leaving party & I vaguely remember that last year some girl turned up in a helicopter.

So, all talk in our house atm is of dresses, shoes, bags; tiara or bow? Hair up or down? etc.

And now she wants
this to take her there. Damn that Katie Price!

I have suggested a) friend with motorbike and b)friend with open-topped sports car, or c) my car. a) being greeted with distain & b) dismissed as 'tacky'. c) - 'I'd rather walk!'

She's going with bf, DS (her twin) is going in a limo with his date & others (booked by some other poor sap parent.

So what do ^normal^ people do? This feels like having a kid's party with a present list at John Lewis - a tad OTT.

When I was at school, prom was at the end of Sixth Form, which seemed to make more sense- this was when we all moved from home and in many cases would never see each other again.

We were lucky because there were lots of farming families around so we got a tractor and trailer to take the whole class.

I did get a nice dress, but the understanding was that this was the dress I would then have for family occasions: my cousin got married the same year, and I even wore the same dress for my postgrad graduation 10 years later.

dd's prom was a few yrs ago
some of the dresses were barftastic I must say

her transport was an old fashioned double decker bus that about 30 of them hired

Rofl at dismissing your suggestions as 'tacky' then wanting Katie Price type transport

A helicopter for crying out loud??!

OP I found that DD's list of must-haves grew longer and longer and longer. Every time I thought that the ensemble was complete, she would find something else to add.

In retrospect, I wish that I had set a budget and said to DD, "that's your lot - you decide how to spend it." Once its their (limited) money that they are spending, then things like a pink carriage are suddenly much less essential.

Tell her you've booked her a Hummer.

Then on the night you and DH ceremoniously open the front door, escort her to your car (something amazingly practical and modest like a brown 1996 Toyota Corolla would be IDEAL), and then you and your DH get into the car going "Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm"

You know. Humming.

We didn't even have a leaving disco because the teachers were all on a work to rule thing, Ah the eighties...those were the days.

DD and friends absolutely refused to have a limo because they are sooooooo common! Some did go by helicopter but it was pathetic - they had to travel 20 miles the other direction from the venue to get the helicopter then it landed well out of sight of the venue - so no-one even saw them arrive. They were laughed at/about for weeks. What were the parents thinking of?

DD1 and 2 didn't end up having a prom but they met up with thier friends to celebrate leaving school, DD3 did have a prom she got a really nice dress from Topshop it was suitable for a prom and she has aslo worn it on toher occassions. Everyone at the prom remarked on how nice she loked and that included some girls she.d had trouble with dring her school days. Her Dad dropped her off and picked her up, Some students did go in limos but a lot were just dropped off by parents or got taxies. No one was looked down upon for not comimg in a limo, A prom is just for the students to celebrate the end of compulsory education. If parents refused to pay for all these extras then the students will have a good time and won't be trying to compete against each other,

It's an absolute joke. I was very proud of my DS and his girlfriend, who looked at me like this when I asked them how they wanted to go to theirs.

They said 'Er...you'll just give us a lift, won't you?'

And I did! Less is more, ladies, less is more.

Having said that, my middle DS has his prom next year and he is of the 'More is More' persuasion. Think we may have some battles with that one....

If she must go in something showy, how about a VW camper van? Now that would be cool. Sorry if it's already been said - only scanned whole thread.

DD wearing my 1985 Laura Ashley dress. I thought it was short then but she's insisting I take another 6 inches off.

She's told her friends it's vintage.......

My DD went in a taxi - a load of them met up here first and they got a "bomber taxi". I gave her some money for her dress, she bought a cheapy and put the rest in her "gap year fund". I don't remember there being too much hype, thankfully

Ds1 has his next year... He is already talking about cool transport.. But I believe he is opting for a real black .. Blacked out limo ( rather than a White stretch).. Although he has asked if hecould tandem sky dive into the venue!... I just said.. Yes love.. You organise it..

but I have to say ewwwwwww to the pink carriage.. It is gawd awful!
If that turned up at ds1 school prom .. It would be the joke of the night! And there are some wacky things that turn up at his.

not sure whether I am "normal" or mean, but I think it all just gets out of hand. Special event for them, so yeah, nice dress, possibly a share in a limo, but I wouldn't pander to the one-upmanship that tends to go with these things. Not had secondary prom but DD had a primary leavers' evening, which some parents chose to call a prom. One of DD's friends had over £500 spent on her outfit, shoes, hair-do and jewellery for the event

ds(16) enjoyed the prom, they clubbed to gether to hire a car - thought it was great.

sad to just leave school with no ceremony at all. imo anyway

lilo, I'm in agreement with you completely. It's ludcicrous. To encourage or indulge children to compete over conspicuous consumption at that age is very bad form. I can just imagine the all the poor insecure girls being looked down upon by the catty A-listers because they haven't spent enough money.

Riven, couldn't agree more.

I refused to let DD take part when a parent arranged limos for the last day of year six (and that's going back five years). I couldn't justify £22 for a half hour car ride and an ice cream. I took a lot of abuse from other parents though DD could see my reasoning. Felt bad on the last day when she turned out to be the only one who didn't go but she doesn't appear to have been scarred for life.

Fortunately the head banned them the year after.

By the time DS left primary school all the year 6 limo nonsense had started. His older sisters were spared and made do with a bbq and disco.

One of the mothers organised a year book as well (It was a pointless activity because out of the 45 children in the year 40 of them were transferring to the same secondary school and so I don't think they needed a special reminder of their friends)