Teenage slang - what are they saying at the moment?

[tamburlaine]

what are the funniest/most annoying/most incomprehensible bits of slang your teens are using at the moment?
I'm writing a piece about teenage boys set in the west country, and my experience of teenage boys is based entirely in hackney where everyone tries to talk like a yardie 'n ting you get me.
So I'd be very grateful for any non hackney mums of teenage boys giving me a list of current slang. Cheers.

Ha ha at this thread, and at Moo. Mince, blimey.

DS1 came home talking about jack-ups the other day. Apparently that's what you're wearing if your trousers are too short for you.

jampots, DS and mates say Random as well.

My niece says (and I love this one) suck it up, build a bridge and get over it!

'safe' =good, OK (in S London anyway)

these are all well sick (meaning excellent, in stoke newington anyway). Keep em rollin. thank you. suzy wong, lol, that's exactly what I mean about norf london, i ave been on de ezzact same bus wiv loss ov whaat kids talkin bout deir fadder an dem buff tings in deir class.moondog i too enjoy embarrassing youths with my antiquated speech.

thanks y'all, please keep them coming.

oh and I've just seen starshaker's one, which I think I am going to start using myself.

Yes,I'm stealing starshaker's sisters' expression too.

Vesuvius-excellent!

I don't have any teenagers but I am in the west country. You could try watching a video of Little Britain's Vikki Pollard, she is from Bristol.

Some phrases that the young-uns at work use:

Shizzle ma nizzle - sorry no idea what it means!
Batty - bottom
Battyboy - homosexual
Rack - breasts
Lush - good
Bitch - either someone who runs around after you, for example you may have a 'tea bitch' to get your drinks at work (?!) or your girlfriend.
And my personal favourite is Milf, it stands for Mum I'd Like to F**k. You don't have to be a mother to be a Milf apparantley, being old enough to be their mother will do!

And of course they all use innit, ya know what I mean and like liberally in all sentences.

Enid - that West Country 'to' thing freaked me out when I moved here. People ask 'Where do you work to' etc. but my personal favourite is 'Where are you from original'. I also like the phrase 'He's gone on' as in he's gone home - it sounds like they've died or something!

Ohhhh, I forgot "bitch" - it has been rendered (sort of) harmless by frequent affectionate use - depends who's using it, and how, of course, but my DDs refer to each other as "bitch" in a nice way and I occasionally collapse them by doing it to them, eg "do you want to come shopping with me, bitch?"

(NB beetroot is mumsnet's all-time favourite BILF - she had it from one of her kids' teachers!!!!! )

You must ask about the 'shizzle my snizzle' thing in work tomorrow and report back asap, fatmooma! lol at 'gone on'!

Sorry, MILF, not BILF

Janh, cracking up at the thought of you jive talkin' your offspring!!!!

shizzle ma nizzle was from whatshisname in last year's Big Brother

What happened with Beety then?

hacky - mucky
pleb - cabbadge or silly person (does anybody remember using the word cabbadge as a teenager?

kama..

Some very dodgy sociolinguistic theorising going on there!

i used the word cabbage very frequently towards my dh at teh moment. Not wishing to offend anyone who works in a factory but I refer to him as a "track cabbage" even though he is no-where near the track he has the same narrow minded mentality as someone whose done the same job for 50 years!

I'll have to remember that one jampots own dh has can be as narrowminded as someone who's worked in a job for 50years

Steady - Dopy, slow, not keeping up with current events.

Yeah, so's your face - can be a response to anything (ie"Do you want a hotdog?" "Yeah, so's your face!")

"That makes you gay" - response to any action of another person's.

Lame - Crap

Enid/Fatmomma, I used to love listening to my older generation rellies who came from Somerset, "how be on, then?" being one of my faves, for 'how are you?'.

They also called wasps "jaspers", for some reason.

jodee - we call wasps 'jaspers' in Norfolk too, no idea why. Being called 'My Lover' by total strangers is also a nice West Country experience - very welcoming!

am, like, so totally lovin these man.
big up to you all.

when i finish my thing it's gonna need subtitles innit.