17yo no weekend curfew?

[janoo]

DS is in yr12, just turned 17. On school
nights he’s home and in bed by 10:30, but weekends are a whole different kettle of fish.
His record so far is 5am, though he’s usually back between 1-2am.
I’m just coming to terms with the fact that he’s out much later (and is drinking). But it’s not usual to give curfews at this age, is it?

My kids are 5 and 2, so no help there. But I know when I was 17/18 I was out all night and sleeping in the garden on occasion at weekends. If he’s respectful and productive during the week is it doing any harm?

If at they are 17 broadly sensible given you no reason to think they are reckless and have a decent stable friendship group then no I wouldn’t have a curfew.

17 is so close to adulthood. I think unless they are causing an absolute ruckus every time they come home or getting in trouble when out, it seems unreasonable to enforce a curfew when they are meant to be learning how to become independent adults

No mine definitely didn’t have curfews at 17

Wish the two idiotic 17 year old boys who ruined DDs 18th had a curfew - ideally 8pm.

My 17yo doesn’t have a curfew at weekends unless he has something important on the next day - at the moment his driving lessons are 9am on a Saturday so Friday nights are 2 pint limit and home by 12. The rule is keep phone charged and text when you’re home. I can’t physically stay awake but at least I can roll over, look at my phone, see he’s in and go back to sleep without getting out of bed. I don’t sleep properly but also know what I was up to when I was 17, and have to remind myself that my poor mum had no way to communicate with me so no doubt lay awake fretting.

My 16 year old doesn't have a curfew as such but he needs to have a plan and communicate it with us.

I don’t think he needs a curfew. At 17 I was doing and going where I wanted - my only rule was to let my parents know where I was/ if I was staying out etc

Actually thinking about I was doing that from about 15/16 - and all my friends were the same. Good old 90s

Yeah that’s what I thought. Thankfully he’s still ok with me being able to see where he is on “Find Me”. He also has a stable group of friends who do look out for each other. It just seems weird not saying “be back by X time please” when he goes out!
And as PPs have said, our mums had no clue at all what we were getting up to at that age so I should af least be thankful that I’m a bit more in the loop!

I’ll be honest DD and her friends were out late from 14/15 onwards the only annoying thing was how they’d get home. Us parents took turns collecting them and once they hit 16 it was up to them to sort out getting buses or walking back in groups. We live in a city with decent 24/7 public transport and fairly walkable. They all had Saturday jobs at 16 so could pay for their own uber if necessary. But my condition was find my phone.

I don’t think a curfew is necessary. We would rather our DD17 gets home safely with others rather than having to leave on her own at an arbitrary time. She knows to stick her head in and announce she is home.

As for DS he just came and went as he pleased but I didn’t need to worry about him as much but did sneak on find my phone so could track him

I’m mid 30s now but mine at 17 was home by 1.30am as my dad would always stay up till I was back. Otherwise stay at a friends house & let them know if I was doing that earlier on in the night. I remember thinking that was a fair.

Tricky bit was going out mid week.