What age did you find hardest with teenage daughters?

[Tricklinn]

I’ve been wondering about this and would love some honest perspectives…

For those of you with daughters, what age did you find the hardest during the teenage years? And on the flip side, was there an age that felt like a bit of a “sweet spot”?

I’m hearing everything from early teens being the trickiest to later teens being more challenging in different ways, and I’m curious what people’s real experiences have been.

Is there a stage where things tend to improve again, or is it just a case of different challenges at different ages?

Would really appreciate any insights (or reassurance!) from those who’ve been through it.

😂

@Orangebadger she was much better in college, and now in her 20s she has a good group of friends. She can still be quite emotional, if she has a problem in work or with one of her friends she can go off the deep end a little bit, I just listen and give a bit of advice if asked for, and she will slowly come to tems with whatever has happened and get on with things.

Agree with this, they are going through so many changes and challenges, they need sympathy, being listened to, boundaries, someone they can turn to if things go wrong.

Not that my teens are perfect or that I am a perfect mother, I am learning every day but I feel the above helps.

Someone recommended here ask Lisa in YouTube. She has some good advice.

I’m sure your parenting was perfect Screamingabdabz and all of us on this thread who really did find our daughters’ behaviour during their teenage years quite challenging, failed in all sorts of significant ways compared to you and your other half 🤨

Sorry for the sarcasm, I am sure you are genuinely good parents and you should rightly be proud of that, and of your DDs too, but do you honestly think that none of us who did experience problems, didn’t factor in tiredness, hormones, self-esteem and stress and didn’t try to support our dc or give them enough independence? One of my DDs is autistic and that presented a whole different set of challenges,

People are parenting in all sorts of different circumstances and stresses. Imhe it’s not a question of “just” doing anything, as this challenging period can be far from easy and can have a significant negative impact on family life. What people need to know though is that if their teenage DD’s behaviour does become challenging, it’s not necessarily their fault and can often be attributed to normal teen development which involves rejecting authority and parental values in order to individuate as an adult and it’s usually a temporary phase of three to five years during which they need to dig deep, pick their battles and keep their own mh intact.

The majority of teenagers do come through and return to being a slightly different grown up version of the delightful child they once were. But let’s not forget the teens who do get lost on their way to adulthood, when impulsive behaviour lead to accidents, or mental health issues emerge for the first time, or a child who is neurodivergent who could cope at school, suddenly falls apart at university, or the teens who succumb to addiction. There isn’t much outside help or support for these families and most parents are just trying to do the best they can in very, very difficult circumstances.

Perhaps worth looking into therapy to help with anxiety; I think is better sooner rather than later. Try to find someone recommended. I wish I would have started earlier with my daughter