Ds has weed now. Do I confront him?

77 replies

louisbalfournice · 03/05/2024 23:13

He's smuggled weed in a tin into his room. I've been told by someone.I asked him when he arrived home and he just lied to my face (he does that a lot).
Do I go up in the morning and turn his room over ? He will be angry !
I know he definitely has it because I've seen a photo of it on his bed. He has no bank card and no access to any cash. My bag is with me at all times too He only has Google wallet on his phone and I can see all the transactions on there. I can't understand how he's got it with no money? If I find it and he is aggressive and demands it giving back, that will put me in a difficult situation. He has ADHD and no sense whatsoever. But that irrelevant as the police would just treat him like any other offender

OP posts:

Maray1967 · 29/07/2024 08:13

TheTerribleMaster · 04/05/2024 06:24

I agree. My DH got into smoking weed as a teenager and it was all consuming, he failed his a-levels and spent months just stoned in his room not working after he left school. He has no qualifications. He is also now in recovery from alcoholism - it could be that he just has an addictive personality but I wonder if those teen years of being on drugs all the time caused that too.
Zero tolerance on drugs in my house.

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Same here - in terms of zero acceptance. DH did it a bit as a student but stopped pretty quickly. I’ve never done it and don’t tolerate it at all. I won’t go to parties if I know someone will have drugs there. I want no part of any social circle that involves drug use.

Maray1967 · 29/07/2024 08:16

Laloca2000 · 04/05/2024 14:37

I have never taken any drugs myself but tried to be open minded when my eldest (independent) adult child started using around age 19. The younger one ,aged around 17 and still living at home, started to dabble cos of their older sibling. They had a diagnosis of ADHD at age 13. The 'dabbling' turned into a regular habit after a couple of years. After two bouts of serious paranoia, lasting 3 months each time, they eventually decided to quit. They were 23 at the time. After 6 months of not indulging, they smoked 2 puffs of someone's joint. The next day as soon as they woke, they had a massive psychotic episode, nearly killing themselves and a sibling in the process. 3 years later they are only now recovering from their injuries. I sincerely regret my 'open-mindedness' and I would urge anyone with teen or young adult kids to take a hard line against this shit. We are still waiting on court process and my now adult child could very well go to jail. They have since been diagnosed with other mental health issues. As I said, I seriously regret my lack of decisive action years ago, and implore you to take steps now to put your foot down. Please show your son my message and by all means contact me privately if that would help. Our lives have been hell these past few years and my otherwise close and very lovely family have all been seriously traumatised by events.Very grateful that they are both still alive but it's been a nightmare. I realise this was an unusual incident, but our lives have been massively affected by all this and I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy. Please keep your family safe, its just not worth it. I wish you all the luck going forward.

Yes, all parents need to reflect on this.

Woolly minded tolerance in drug use can have very serious consequences and I’m not prepared to risk this. Not will I have any drugs in my house. Any guests who turned up with stuff would be told to leave.

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