Please help. 13 year old sexting! I’m heartbroken

[Pampas07]

Hi, I checked my DDs phone today and found sexts between her and another girl. They had sent pictures (the self deleting ones) and the chat was so graphic. I feel broken, the girl she’s chatting with has issues I know about, self harm and suicidal attempts. I’ve had a chat with her and said if you like girls that’s not a problem but sending these kind of messages is! You’re too young to get involved in this kind of talk! She’s only just turned 13 for gods sakes.

I’ve taken her phone and I’m going to get her a basic calls and text phone. But am I right? She’s upstairs crying and saying she has no friends and this girl is important to her. I just don’t know what to do for the best 😪

she’s in a club with this girl and I’ve spoken to the safeguarding person for the club in the past about this girl (my daughter flagged the suiside to them) I’ve called them and they are talking about police!

She needs to know that what they have been doing is sharing inappropriate images of children - it may be themselves but they are still possessing it and it could potentially (it won't of course, but she needs to realise the severity) end up on a register. There are child phone contracts you can get that log each text message/ phone call and save it for you to access as well as screen for inappropriate words and phrases etc. might be worth investigating?

Ah the sim I got is parentshield. It's not particularly cheap mind!

She needs to know there could be serious consequences. it's a murky world. If you come down too hard on her she could become secretive and sly, don't come down hard enough and she'll find a way to keep doing it.
Have you thought of approaching the other girls parents or even the school?

kids today oh dear all we had were Jackie Collins Stud and men in pants in the Luttlewoods catalogue.

Thanks guys. I’ve taken her phone and just getting her a phone that just calls and texts and disabling the text. Her laptop is downstairs and she can only use it in the dining room. She’s just upstairs crying her eyes out now after I spoken to her. I just wish I could make her happy and take these adult thoughts completely.

I’ve spoken to her about the law and the telecoms act, that got her attention but she’s saying she loves this girl. I’ve said nothing in those messages showed love.

You've done everything right. Now it's time to go upstairs give her a big hug and ask her if she would like a hot chocolate or an ice cream or whatever she likes and then chat to her about how you accept her if she likes girls

Meant to say re-iterate that it's ok for her to like girls

Hi, yep I’ve done that, she said she doesn’t know, I’ve said not to worry and they’re more important things in Life than who you fancy. Like friends and people that love you. She said she has no friends. She’s very intense and a little adhd, she makes friends and falls out quickly (girls eh 🤷🏻‍♀️)
it’s more the specific girl she’s been talking too, she’s got a lot of issues, and the messages content, they are extreme! Oral sex etc and very graphic, more graphic from this other girl, I would go as far as to say grooming. My daughter definitely joined in but a little more innocently.

her dad came out as gay last year, and met someone recently, against my protests he introduced this guy a few weeks ago, I asked him to take it slow and intro him as a friend and go slow and to not be affectionate in front of her strait away. He didn’t listen. I’m worried this has also messed with her head.

I have no issue with her dad, we have been apart for a long time and no issues with being gay. But when I met my fiancé I took it slow to make it easier for her.

I don’t know, I thought having a teen the worse would be moodiness and slamming doors 😪