teen never goes out with friends but now that i made her offer…

[icecreamvann]

Recently, I noticed that my 13yo DD hasn’t really gone out with friends since we gave her independence. She walks to school and back with friends and sometimes pops into the shop for sweets etc, but there’s never been any arrangements or invites. I’m starting to suspect these ‘friends’ are forgetting her.

My DD is friendly , she shares interests with her friends so I’ve suggested to her to invite someone. She did, but with hesitation because she thought it would be declined.

2h later, she comes in shouting that she’s going to a town 30min bus drive to go shopping on Wednesday. She’s happily finding an outfit to wear, and texting edlessly.

But, I’m kinda worried, she’s never done this sort of thing, so should i let her??

Why don't you think she can manage a bus?

What do you mean by 'giving her independence' if you're not ok with her going to shopping with her friends in the middle of the day?

My 10 year old has started doing this sort of thing as preparation for secondary school! He goes into town with friends for a few hours at weekends - checks in with me about what he is up to.

Yes of course you can let her go! She will only learn how to be independent by actually being independent.

Even if things go wrong - (which sometimes they do as kids try things out) that is part of growing up.

she's 13 of course you should let her

So you worry about her being not independent but then worry about her finding some fun with her friends for a couple of hours?

I think the problem might be with you, to be honest.