-8 and refusing a coat

[Piscesmumma1978]

What are you supposed to do? Let them freeze?

She has to wait up to 15 minutes for the bus sometimes and it's absolutely freezing today.

Do I just let her get cold?

My DD is the same, texts me telling me she is freezing at the bus stop but won’t wear a coat as she said that it’s too warm in college and she doesn’t want to carry it round. Have offered to buy her a new one or she could wear one she already has. Her choice 🤷🏻‍♀️

Does she have a scarf, gloves and hat?

Not much you can do 🤷‍♀️

I'd totally leave it up to her.

Delighted to learn I’m not the only one. 🙄🤬

Refuses gloves etc as well. She says she doesn't feel the cold.

Why are they so difficult 🙄

I’ve just dropped my daughter to school - lots of teenagers not wearing a coat & a few girls no tights - it was -5

At least she wears tights! I did get some fleece lined 300 ones last night so that makes me feel better.

Mine won't wear one either. She's miserable and the cold hurts her but she won't budge. I even offered a nike or north face option but she refused.
She's waiting for an ASD assessment. She's basically scared to do anything at school that might make people see her, taking off a coat included.

Uniqlo has ultralight parkas that fold up really really small. Would she wear it while waiting and hide it in her bag after or would she be worried someone would see her? (I know this isn’t rational but it must be part of the coat refusal, mustn’t it?)
What’s her plan if the bus doesn’t come and she waits much longer?

@megletthesecond Can you layer her up with thermals if she is feeling the cold? Base layers under might help?

My dd would never admit she's cold.

DD is 12 and won't wear a coat or tights too. She says she's inside all day so there's no point 🤦🏼‍♀️ I just let her. I figure if she's cold one day she won't do it again.

Yes. Don't know any kid who where's a coat in secondary school! Mind you they did where a jacket on the weekends.

They have body autonomy at this age. It's completely up to her. You can encourage but not force anyone.

My DD will wear a coat - is one of those padded jackets with down in, very thin but she claims is warm enough and most importantly it packs up small so she can stuff it in her bag. Point blank refuses hats (doesn't want hat hair), scarves or gloves. And she won't wear tights or trousers either - she only wears shorts at home.

Her brother on the other hand hates being cold, wears thermals, vests, double gloves, snood, hats, hood - he leaves the house like the Michelin man.

Teenagers!

Mine feels that coats, hats, scarves and gloves are embarrassing! She has grudgingly left for school this morning with a pair of the plainest black gloves on and a very light raincoat over her blazer.

However, she hadn't worn a skirt since she was 6 so at least she has trousers on!

DS’s school basically mandates coat wearing. So they have to arrive wearing it. Or they get a day in isolation.

The fact they have to wear the coat means the kids just do. They wear it to school since they have to have it anyway.

You can buy warm duvet coats which then stuff into a little bag. Look at ski wear sports shops

Tbh, the inadequate design of schools (and the school day) contributes to the issues. There’s no where to store a coat (certainly not securely). Even where there are lockers of reasonably size (or at all), there isn’t the time in the day to be fetching coats and putting them away repeatedly. Breaks are short and taking 10 minutes in crowded corridors to retrieve or put back a coat is not desirable.

I remember really resenting all the stuff I had to carry to, from and around secondary school. Even more so when you had to bring PE kit too. Getting issued with a large, heavy textbook by a subject was a nightmare.

Old enough to go on a bus by themselves, old enough to know they'll get cold without a coat. My 12 year old refuses to wear a coat because she has to carry it around in school, and when she has her pe kit, it's too much, apparently.

Thanks all. Maybe I'll just let her get on with it and save the morning argument. It's just frustrating as I hate the thought of her cold x

Mine is the same! But thinking about it, I was the same as a teenager. Bloody stubborn to my own detriment and far too self-conscious to wear anything bulky or shows me as 'weak'. Irrational but yes, just let her be.

I hate wearing a coat too. Yes, I get cold sometimes but it's only temporary and it's less hassle to be cold than to be burdened with a coat for the whole day. People occasionally comment and I tell them I'm fine. Anyone who gets bossy about it is firmly told that I've been dressing myself for over 50 years and I know what I'm doing.

Having said that, a lightweight, packable, extra layer might work for her. Or little heat pads for her pockets.

I live in Sweden. It's been -5 to -12 for a couple of weeks. My teenager will only wear sneakers, and won't wear his padded coat because "it doesn't fit in my school locker and I'm not carrying it around all day".

Teens are dumb. What would they do if they lived in Sibiria I wonder.