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Teenagers

Parenting teenagers has its ups and downs. Get advice from Mumsnetters here.

Original poster

DD and her school skirt

127 replies

BaconAndAvocado · 13/10/2022 13:26

DD14 insists on rolling up her school kilt until it’s extremely short. Under duress, she will roll it down but it’s a battle.
DH goes mad, saying that men will look at her. Her response this morning was, “No man gets to dictate what I wear.”
When I drive past her school, a few girls are wearing their skirts extremely short too but many aren’t. I don’t think the school insists they roll their kilts down.
I drive her to school but she walks home alone.
Am I worrying needlessly?

OP posts:
icelollycraving · 19/10/2022 07:34

It’s always been like this. I used to do this in the 80s. I’d leave home looking wholesome and fresh faced. One bus journey later and a short skirt, different shoes, entire range of Boots 17 and big hair stustustudioline style.

BabyST · 19/10/2022 22:08

Can you not raise it to the school to have a word with all girls?

99redballoonsgobyy · 21/10/2022 18:20

yes my dd the same age does this too. Totally spoils her lovely smart uniform and I agree with a pp that it's totally unflattering and yes dd also tucks her jumper into her waistband. We've told her we don't like it and she'd look much better with her skirt it's actual length but she doesn't care. on the other hand she's doing great at school and achieving high grades so I leave her be.

99redballoonsgobyy · 21/10/2022 18:25

@icelollycraving omg you just brought back memories with stustustustudioline! "style your hair any way you like it!" 😃
did you also wear those white ruffle down socks and had to get the ruffles perfect in them before going out to school. we would sometimes wear 2 pairs for some reason. we must've had sweaty feet!

StopStartStop · 21/10/2022 18:29

The girls at our local church school wear their skirts barely covering their knickers. I'd complain, but I went to the same school in the '70s and did the same.

icelollycraving · 21/10/2022 20:27

@99redballoonsgobyy yes I did!

99redballoonsgobyy · 21/10/2022 21:43

@icelollycraving me too late 80s very early 90s not forgetting dewberry mist body spray from the bodyshop. our school changing rooms stank of it after PE 25 girls all spraying it.

Original poster
BaconAndAvocado · 22/10/2022 16:20

99redballoonsgobyy · 21/10/2022 21:43

@icelollycraving me too late 80s very early 90s not forgetting dewberry mist body spray from the bodyshop. our school changing rooms stank of it after PE 25 girls all spraying it.

Dewberry! I loved that fragrance. Unfortunately, think it’s long discontinued.

OP posts:
Quartz2208 · 22/10/2022 16:52

Ah Dewberry and Fussy Peach from Boy SHop

And Lynx Africa for the boys

TheOrigRights · 22/10/2022 17:14

Quartz2208 · 22/10/2022 16:52

Ah Dewberry and Fussy Peach from Boy SHop

And Lynx Africa for the boys

Loved Dewberry.
The girls have moved on, but Lynx Africa is very much present in my son's life!

Pinkysunset · 22/10/2022 17:30

I work in a senior school and most of the older girls roll their kilts up. I was in dt class the other week and a girl carefully put in her apron folded at the waist so it was a short as her kilt I did have to say something there as we were moulding hot plastic and the apron is to protect their legs from very hot materials! You don’t need to look attractive when working in a workshop at the risk of burning your legs!

Quartz2208 · 22/10/2022 17:43

TheOrigRights · 22/10/2022 17:14

Loved Dewberry.
The girls have moved on, but Lynx Africa is very much present in my son's life!

Show quote history

Just the smell of Lynx Africa brings back memories - good and bad!

Bananabreadandstrawberries · 22/06/2023 13:24

I must be in the minority here but I’m with your DH. Please excuse my choice of words but I think young girls dressed like this look excessively sexualised and trashy. People will look at them accordingly, whether that was their intention or not.

I would not want my teenager dressed like this - but I know it’s hard to go against the ‘trend’.

MsTSwift · 22/06/2023 13:43

I can’t stand it either. I would love to know how to prevent this though. I have been nice / mean tried every approach. Short of giving up my job and stalking my 14 year old yanking down her skirt I am stumped.

FrenchandSaunders · 22/06/2023 13:53

As others have said this has gone on for decades. I did it in the 80s, my DDs did it when they were at school 4/5 years ago.

There's absolutely nothing you can do about it. You can try and insist she leaves the house with it at a decent length but then she'll only roll it up at school.

I remember painful PTA meetings when 'any other business' came up and one mum, who only had boys, every single bloody time would say "can I raise the issue of skirt length" with pursed lips ..... ffs.

XelaM · 22/06/2023 14:04

How does the length of the skirt in any way affect their education? Let them wear what they want

SparkyBlue · 22/06/2023 14:06

Bizarrely where I am the fashion is for the uniform skirt to be as long as possible. OP I'd pick my battles I wouldn't be creating a drama over the length of a skirt

JazbayGrapes · 22/06/2023 16:05

How does the length of the skirt in any way affect their education? Let them wear what they want

For every girl that rolls up her skirt in need for attention there will be numerous who will be sexually harassed - in school and outside. This is counter-productive to learning and general well-being.

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 22/06/2023 16:09

JazbayGrapes · 22/06/2023 16:05

How does the length of the skirt in any way affect their education? Let them wear what they want

For every girl that rolls up her skirt in need for attention there will be numerous who will be sexually harassed - in school and outside. This is counter-productive to learning and general well-being.

So it will be the girl's fault if she is sexually harrased? Because she rolled up her skirt?

I thought we had made more progress than that. How disappointing.

Presumably you think girls who wear longer skirts don't have to worry about the risk of getting harassed because they are dressed appropriately? Or is it simply that they might still be harassed but you won't consider it to be their fault?

JazbayGrapes · 22/06/2023 16:14

So it will be the girl's fault if she is sexually harrased? Because she rolled up her skirt?

So what is the point of rolling up skirts in the first place then?

BerryShots · 22/06/2023 16:16

XelaM · 22/06/2023 14:04

How does the length of the skirt in any way affect their education? Let them wear what they want

If other people can see your thong underwear when you walk up stairs, or sit down then that's not appropriate for an education setting.

No one (students and staff) should be showing underwear.

MrsBennetsPoorNerves · 22/06/2023 16:19

JazbayGrapes · 22/06/2023 16:14

So it will be the girl's fault if she is sexually harrased? Because she rolled up her skirt?

So what is the point of rolling up skirts in the first place then?

No idea, but I'm pretty sure that they're not trying to "attract" sexual harassment.

Women and girls can be the victims of sexual harassment and/or sexual assault regardless of what they wear. It is always the fault of the person harassing or assaulting them.

Or are you arguing that boys/men just can't help harassing girls and women who dress in a certain way?

Freefall212 · 22/06/2023 16:22

Men and boys have eyes just like girls and women. So yes, if she wants others to see her butt or whatever she wants visible by rolling her skirt way up, then yes, they will look and see he rbutt hanging out of her skirt. And if the boys roll their pants down so their butts are showing, others will also look and see whatever they want them to see by having their butt hanging out of their pants. All boys and girls know that people have eyes and can see and will look at whatever they are showing.

XelaM · 22/06/2023 16:33

JazbayGrapes · 22/06/2023 16:14

So it will be the girl's fault if she is sexually harrased? Because she rolled up her skirt?

So what is the point of rolling up skirts in the first place then?

Because it looks better. Knee-length skirts look frumpy and young girls don't want to look frumpy.

JazbayGrapes · 22/06/2023 16:43

Because it looks better. Knee-length skirts look frumpy and young girls don't want to look frumpy.

While i despise school uniforms in general, but school skirts on young girls are not supposed to look sexually suggestive.