Wild swimming.

[malificent7]

Dd (13) wants to go wild swimming with a group of mates in a well known local spot for swimming...very slow river.
Whilst on the surfave it seems like a lovely thing to do I am concerned for the following reasons;
It is a 25 min drive from our house in a rural village.
She dosn't want me or any other adults around which means if anything happens i will be out of reach.
She is a fair swimmer but the banks can be hard to get out of.

I told her no but there was a massive scene saying all the other parents are letting their kids go so why can't I.
I have let her go to a local town on the bus alone but i feel uneasy about a remote spot. There are always lots of swimmers there though.

Am I being over protective?
At what age can i let her go wild swimming with mates unsupervised as it is a lovely thing for kids to do but atm i feel she and her mates are too ditsy/ immature to handle a crisis?

Ds14 is a very strong swimmer, does lots of activities on the water and has done lots of water based courses, however I would not let him go wild swimming with a group of friends in a river without an adult. The water temperature, flow etc are too unpredictable and you have no idea how good the others are at swimming. It is so easy to get into trouble and it can happen very fast.

Not being over-protective I think. I doubt very much all the other parents are agreeable, and if your DD cannot come up with a better expression or reason, even more reason to say no.

As for handling a crisis in general, because in schooling and elsewhere far too many children are shielded from disappointment and difficulty, no surprise if some 13 year olds could not cope in a crisis. Even if your DD was one who could.

I think if she was a stronger swimmer and a bit older id let her but she hasn't been swimming throughout lockdown.

I work with 13 year olds doing outdoor activities and also a good swimmer/swim outdoors. Individually, they're probably only starting to learn about and assess risks and collectively, there's not a chance the group would be able to do this. No way would I allow this without supervision.

I 'wild' swim (it's normal around here as there weren't any pools locally until ten years ago). As people said I'd encourage it but think they are too young to go without supervision. Could sone parents go and sit at a distance. I know they don't want it but would be a compromise. At that age I did spend days at swimming lakes with a friend (her parents dropped us and left us) but they were usually lifeguarded.

Well known wild swimming spots are likely to be pretty safe, and rivers which you walk in to are less risky than plunging into cold water (though I note you say it can be difficult to get out, which suggests higher banks, and then you get the risks of cold water plus jumping and landing in a hidden hazard below the water)

If an adult was going, ideally two with a car each, and they had some competence in dealing with emergencies, then I think that would be fine. Also it's easier to keep dry clothes, food and valuables in a car when you're in the water.

Accidents do happen, and open water drownings are an unfortunately all too frequent cause of avoidable death. I have family near the Broads and it happens to someone every year

Even though my guess is that there would be very little swimming and rather more teenage partying, I still think it's a bad idea at that age.

The weather forecast is very wet for a stretch, stick to your guns and hope the idea goes away.

Thanks for the good advice on here. Sadly dd was absolutely adamant that she didn't want any adults present meaning that there will prob be some shenanagins going on.

Its a firm NO from me...she seems to have reluctantly accepted it.

Absolutely no way