How much board?

[Sexyfothermucker]

Hi. My DS19 starts a full time job next week. He will be coming out with just short of £1700.
I have no idea how much board to charge. Some are saying £200 pcm. Others are saying a 1/3 of his monthly wage.
Could anyone help please?

Regardless on whether i could afford to keep them as it were, or not I would ask for at least £200 a month.

I agree OP it is important to learn how to budget and how much things cost in the real world. The majority of teens have this entitled attitude and it is important for them to learn about contributing to the household. I dont think letting them live with you for free when they are earning is healthy.

(Before anyone jumps down my throat I have teens and I know a fair few and the majority of them have an entitled view of themselves whether they have been brought up that way or not.

I think I know one who is does not have an entitled attitude but has a sibling who does).

My DD pays £200 per month. I think that's a good balance. It is obviously helping her out as it's way way below market rates. It's also a help for me. I'm not quite a boomer and missed out on that level of privilege! As a single parent losing child benefit and tax credits was a hit. But I would probably ask for a contribution even if I didn't need it. There's a time in life when you take responsibility and pay your way.

We never charged my stepsons and won't be charging our younger two - it's the only chance they get to save and it's their home, IMO. If you want to teach them responsibility you could charge them then secretly save it all to give back at a later date toward a house deposit?

Nothing.

I wouldn't charge my child board if my life dependent on it.

Encourage him to save for his future.

If you want to teach them responsibility you could charge them then secretly save it all to give back at a later date toward a house deposit?

Surely that teaches the exact opposite

If you want them to save wife a house deposit then encourage them to save themselves!

@TomorrowsPrincess if you’re going to quote me to suggest budgeting earnings is different to budgeting money earned perhaps don’t redact the end of my sentence where I say they budget their earnings.

And paying £200 to mum and dad is not learning how to manage “grown up bills”

@TomorrowsPrincess if you’re going to quote me to suggest budgeting earnings is different to budgeting pocket money and allowances perhaps don’t redact the end of my sentence where I say they budget their earnings

And paying £200 to mum and dad is not learning how to manage “grown up bills

Op I must have lived with the offspring of some of the posters on here in my flat sharing days. They were so ill prepared for the real world it was frightening!
They were appalling at managing their finances and literally had no concept of setting money aside for utility bills, rent etc They had never paid a penny towards their living expenses at home and were clueless.

Paying board is such good preparation for the real world, £1700 is a great disposable income, I'd charge £400-500 and save half for him for when he leaves home.
I'm 48 and would love £1200 a month spare all to myself!

@PerveenMistry

I wouldn't charge my child board if my life dependent on it.

Encourage him to save for his future.

So dramatic

Op I must have lived with the offspring of some of the posters on here in my flat sharing days. They were so ill prepared for the real world it was frightening!

Oh come on, my DD is well prepared for the real world, she works and saves and is already buying bits and pieces for when she does move out.

They were appalling at managing their finances and literally had no concept of setting money aside for utility bills, rent etc They had never paid a penny towards their living expenses at home and were clueless.

I'm appalling at managing my finances, still now in my 40s, but it isn't because I lived at home rent free, I paid more than half my wage to live in the family home.

Both my dds never paid keep.
One is 25 with her own house and car. Paid a big chunk for a deposit.
The other has a car she paid for and is about to move into her own flat. Has money saved for furniture and for travelling when that's allowed again. They both worked through uni and sixth form and both got great degrees from top unis.
You are wrong if you think the only way to teach financial common sense is to take money off your kids.

Are you kidding? 1/3?! Jesus.

£200 " for now" Sounds like you're taking money just because you can

Maybe encourage him to save the amount he would pay on rent/ bill, , this is wonderful opportunity for him to save for his future 🙏

@MrsKeats

Both my dds never paid keep. One is 25 with her own house and car. Paid a big chunk for a deposit. The other has a car she paid for and is about to move into her own flat. Has money saved for furniture and for travelling when that's allowed again. They both worked through uni and sixth form and both got great degrees from top unis. You are wrong if you think the only way to teach financial common sense is to take money off your kids.

Great that it worked out well for your dc but in all my flat sharing years, the friends who were always behind with bills, spending beyond their means etc were the ones who had never paid a bill in their lives. I lived in several flat shares over 7 years before settling down with dh, so mine is probably a broader experience than yours. Unfortunately my 19 year old dd is encountering the same problems in her uni house share!

Do you need to charge him rent? If not, then don't. But put him in charge of doing one family shop a month, and make sure he's doing household chores and his share of the cooking.

Don't bother putting him in charge of one shop a month...you won't have much to eat and have arguments.

We charge ours £250 per month. That still leaves him £1450 a month and he saves nearly £1000 per month towards a house deposit. We are saving the board which we will put towards a house for him when he decides to buy

littleflufffy
But kids can pay their own bills even when at home such as car tax/phones/car insurance/gym membership/subscriptions etc.
You have absolutely no idea whether your experience 'is broader'
What a patronising thing to say.

I lived in several flat shares over 7 years before settling down with dh, so mine is probably a broader experience than yours.

Ah you must be right then. Nobody else's experience or knowledge has any value now we know you have lived in several flat shares.

End of thread. We have a right one.

Wow!! What no one seems to consider/acknowledge is that charging your grown up children a nominal amount towards household costs isn't just about 'learning to budget' but also about learning that you're not entitled to live off other people, and that there is (gasp!) a COST of living. The whole point of a 'nominal' amount is so that they CAN still save for their future while having the comfort of home.

Fgs. People aren't "charging" their "children" to live at home. They are adults with a job and a decent wage with little to spend it on so they are CONTRIBUTING as any adult should. The only adult who lives with no financial responsibility is a freeloader. £200 seems to be a popular amount to ask for which is a absolute bargain as out in the real world who can have a great standard of living, everything included for £50 a week?

@Santaisreel

I lived in several flat shares over 7 years before settling down with dh, so mine is probably a broader experience than yours.

Ah you must be right then. Nobody else's experience or knowledge has any value now we know you have lived in several flat shares.

End of thread. We have a right one.

No need for the hissy fit dear.

Do note that I said my experience was 'probably broader' not definitely and categorically so...
I based that on the poster talking only about her own dc, while I was talking about years of flat sharing with a variety of different people.

His share of the household bills. I find charging rent or board is too transactional. You're a family, everyone who's bringing in money should be contributing.

How much his share is, well that depends on how many people there are and your relative incomes.

@MrsKeats

littleflufffy But kids can pay their own bills even when at home such as car tax/phones/car insurance/gym membership/subscriptions etc. You have absolutely no idea whether your experience 'is broader' What a patronising thing to say.

Aside from car expenses and a phone, none of those are exactly life essentials, so a hilarious example of living off others while paying for your own luxuries!

I lived with people that had money for the gym but apparently didn't realise you had to pay your council tax.

Have you lost anything as a result of him starting work, eg council tax deduction, child benefit or tax credits?

I'm not sure why so many women on here think that their children should never contribute. I wouldn't ask mine to if a) I could afford and b) I thought they couldn't afford, but otherwise why on earth not? Everyone pays for living expenses out of their wages - that's why they go to work.

Wow!! What no one seems to consider/acknowledge is that charging your grown up children a nominal amount towards household costs isn't just about 'learning to budget' but also about learning that you're not entitled to live off other people, and that there is (gasp!) a COST of living.

It's ok, mine know it's not an entitlement. I don't need to take their money to teach them that though.