DD almost 18 and no periods?

[JufusMum]

DD is almost 18, slim, athletic. Tiny boobs just appearing but no sign of periods. We had hormone tests two years ago and all appeared fine.
She’s going to university in September and I’m worried when it starts I won’t be there to help/hand hold.
Any advice gratefully received thank you x

CtrlU yes I agree I have seen many dancers like this but honestly, DD is definitely not starving herself. Friends and family often remark on her large appetite and “where does she put it all?”.
Agree though with many posters that I need to force her to see the GP.

It's not always the starving herself part though, when people exercise a lot your body is put under a lot of stress and this is what can stop periods or not allow them to start as your body thinks it's too stressful a time to put energy into either regulating periods or for you to have a period. Your body doesn't realise the difference between it being under stress due to dancing versus being g under stress due to being unwell etc, your body systems just know that periods aren't suitable yet. So if your saying she eats a lot then i wouldn't worry about that but if could be the level or training. Does she have a coach you can talk to? Your gp is a lot a good person to speak to but if her hormone levels are normal it's either time or the training load xx

Have things like her thyroid gland been checked? High thyroxine levels can cause weight loss, or failure to gain enough weight, while at the same time having an enormous and endless appetite. That is because it sends the metabolism into overdrive.

She needs to see her GP again. Whatever you say, size 6 - 8 at 5ft 7 is extremely underweight. Worryingly so.

My DD3 is also tall and was about the same size. She had very few periods at all until she was nearly 17. She turned out to have anorexia nervosa with severe mental health issues. I'm not saying that is the case for your DD, there are other causes too.

She needs to go back to her GP because as others have pointed out, there can be consequences here. If not now then maybe in the future.

How does she know that she is never going to get periods? Has she been reading stuff online about keeping them at bay and isn't going to tell you that?

@JufusMum

Good idea For encouraging her to see her GP

I had a friend at dance school who was very similar. Stick thin and always active. Ate big portions so everyone assumed she was naturally thin. However she had an eating disorder and knew how to hide it very well.
She would eat around friends and family to prevent anyone questioning her health - and often after she ate she would purge it back up when nobody was around. If she didn’t get the opportunity to purge then she would skip meals. Or she would eat but she would eat a big salad or a big portion of vegetables so yes she’s eaten but it’s certainly not enough calories her body needed.
She was naturally tall and slim / athletic but she was slim / skinny by making she she didn’t gain weight.

Good luck OP x

I really don’t think DD has an eating disorder. She put away a full tandoori mixed grill, pilau rice, a Keema naan, an onion bahji and then was asking for dessert last night!
She’s definitely not making herself sick. Since lockdown she’s been with DH 24/7 we would definitely know.
Also during lockdown she has only been doing one hour of dance a day in zoom - and very restricted as no space in the lounge. She’s definitely “filled out” a bit during lockdown as some of her size 6 have had to go in the charity bag. She’s mainly been eating and laying in bed like most teenagers with no A levels to do!
I did hope the periods might have started during this time.
I’ve just spoken to her about pcos/brittle bones fears and she said “yeah I’ve read about that”. She’s agreed to see GP once our surgery reopens.
She’s going to uni to train to be a police officer so maybe the brittle bones thing has scared her?

For all it's worth I don't think she sounds like she has an eating disorder either, not all thin girls/women do try not to worry but best get it looked at sooner rather than later, sounds like she might be willing to speak to the dr again so I'd just go down that route, good luck xx

Dd was super thin too. As soon as her periods started she put on two stone and boobs grew!

I would consider coeliac disease- discuss with your GP.

I didn’t have periods until 17.5, I was also very thin at this time.
I’m now 33, wasn’t diagnosed coeliac until 32. I’m now going into peri-menopause.
Coeliac causes a short fertile span in some women. It affects so much, including fertility.
I would consider this as a point to discuss with your DD’s GP.

Don't wait for the surgery to reopen ; this is just the sort of thing that can be discussed on the phone or video link. Different surgeries vary but at ours she could get blood tests underway .They can take time to come back in current times so I would st least advise her to have a phone appointment with her doctor for a plan to be made.

Op, I’m sorry but if she’s “tall” and a size six she’s very defintely under weight

I don't think comments like this are at all helpful. By all means make the suggestion, but you're of course not able to say the OP's daughter is "very definitely" anything.

I don't think comments like this are at all helpful. By all means make the suggestion, but you're of course not able to say the OP's daughter is "very definitely" anything

I think many people would disagree with you, I’m one of them, the op is asking why her daughters periods have not started and being underweight is a common reason. Very few people who are a size six and five foot eight will be a healthy weight.

Very few people who are a size six and five foot eight will be a healthy weight

That's a ridiculous thing to say.

Just GP it for peace of mind. The fact her aunt was a late developer makes me think your daughter is to. Its unusual but not unheard of to start at 18/19. (I was 10, how lovely that shes missed the awkward secondary school years of shared changing rooms for PE and periods!)

Dd3 (14) is a footballer and athlete, eats like a horse and is 5.9 and a size 6/8 (no period issues either!). She is very fit, healthy and happy.

Very few people who are a size six and five foot eight will be a healthy weight

You said the OP's daughter would "very definitely" be underweight, not "very few people who are a size six and five foot eight will be a healthy weight". Those two statements are very different things.

My point is you can't for a moment make a definitive statement.

I think we've totally lost sight of what a healthy weight is tbh.

A 16 year old who is a size 12/14 is likely to be on the heavier side.

Obviously doctor is in order at this age with no periods, but I must say I do take offence at people persisting that someone of 1.70m in a size 6 is so underweight her periods would not come through.

I'm only about 6 cm shorter and weigh 50 kgs, have been lighter and have had three children with no issues. I started periods at 15, which is normal. I am also a size 6 (size 8 is baggy) and I am not underweight.

People just seem to be used to chubby people these days.

My best friend has a bmi of 19, 5'8 size 10. Maybe an 8 in certain shops but no way in hell would she get into a 6.

Its possible shes not underweight, however size 6-8 is small for 5'8. Its also possibe for her to be underweight and not have an ED.

When i had the beginnings of my eating disorder comments like 'i dont know how people can not eat' were exactly the sort of things Id say. Throw my mum off the scent you know?

Im not saying she does have an ED, but that you cant rule it out.

18 and no periods is really unusual, theres most likely a cause. It might just be that shes very athletic, but it needs looking into.

My best friend has a bmi of 19, 5'8 size 10. Maybe an 8 in certain shops but no way in hell would she get into a 6

Presumably she's not a 17 year old?

@kikibo

Well your BMI is 18.5, you are literally bang on the 'not underweight' line. So you can see how if you were 6cms taller and the same size you would most likely be underweight?

@ITonyah no, that is true. We are 22 though so not that much older!

As I said its possible that the OPs dd is not underweight but 18, no periods and at her height and size its concerning.

But we don't know her weight! Just her dress size.

I wouldn't worry too much. Low fat ratio and active lifestyle can mean a late start. I would go back to the GP though for peace of mind.

I have a friend who didn't start until she was 22, she's fine and has three children.

But we don't know her weight! Just her dress size

Ehrm have you seen a size six? Have you ever met a five eight woman who wears a six?

@CarrotTops I don't see that no. The size trousers you wear has more to do with your hip bones, IMO, than with your weight if you are thin. If you're straight v an hourglass, then it's perfectly possible to also be a size 6, even if you are taller. Conversely, classmates of mine were as tall as me and were a larger size because they had wider hips. Though they weren't chubby.