Suitable punishment/ discipline for this?

[isittimetogotobed]

Dd is 15. She has had her nipple pierced!
Both me and her father are so disappointed. I think we were both so stunned that we haven't actually got around to any sort of punishment yet as we were just so shocked that a she had lied to us and b done something like this
What do you you think is an appropriate punishment?
Make her take it out?
Grounded?
No phone?
She has had a really hard time lately, feeling low/ bullied abit/ friendship stuff but is generally well behaved and achieving well at school.

I think a tummy button is one thing maybe bit a nipple is something else entirely

Children under 16 clearly do not have full bodily autonomy. They have a right to say no but not to do what they will to their bodies. Why do people keep repeating this idiotic maxim. Plastic surgery? Botox? Full facial tattoo?

The OP’s daughter agreed not to do this and she went behind the OP’s back to a dodgy place and had it done anyway.

Parents have a duty to parent and, ultimately, these boundaries give teenagers the security to risk minor rebellions. Should schools also have no consequences or dress codes because the pupils should have bodily autonomy? Sometimes the MN hive mindset is surreal.

Tell her to remove it and reduce her allowance for some period. She will respect you a lot more for that than trying to be ‘cool’ and matey about it.

Her body her choice imo sorry. It’s just a piercing you really can’t dictate to your children how they dress, hairstyles or what they do piercing/tattoo wise. Obviously you can express an opinion or let them know you are not keen but imagine how you would feel if there was someone telling you couldn’t have your hair the way you like it or wear your favourite top. It’s the same thing.

I have never got a piercing for anyone else bar myself. Your friend is an idiot!!

It's nothing about being 'cool and matey' , it's about picking your battles , they way I'd see it ( and both of my dc are older than this age) is that if she's done this and you insist she takes it out , not sure how you manage that unless you want her to walk around the house naked from the waist up , then would she be idiot enough to go off and do something more permanent like a home tattoo, or a bad tattoo . At least with a piercing you can just take it out with no real issues .

HOw? I took dd to a tattoo parlour for a piercing recently and def no intimate piercing until 18 & they have to be with a parent until they’re 16. She wanted to go with a friend but both are still 15 so I had to take her on her own.

Oh God! She's just trying to fit in with her friends! Just tell her you're a bit annoyed about her getting it done but it's her body.
That would be end of it from me.
My daughter asked if she could have a nose piecing at 16, I said I didn't like them and please don't spoil your pretty face. She just said in having it done so I said fine. Not going to risk losing my relationship with her for a piercing. She took it out 6months later anyway and said it wasn't trendy now everyone had them.
Twenty odd years on, she says "Oh God mum, dd wants to shave half her head" my Granddaughter was 16 and had beautiful long hair. I just laughed and said "nose piercing? Leave her to it" which thank God she did, in fact telling gd how great it looked and really suited her. Six months later after dyeing in bright green as well. Gd starts growing it out.
As for myself at that age, I'd better not go into it, because I could beat them both hands down.

We have all turned out fine, we all still love each other and stop worrying your dd will turn out fine.
Choose your battles!! Keep your family!