Parenting a teen with MH issues

[LeavesBlowingInTheWind]

Can anyone recommend a book/website for parents of teens with MH problems?

My issue is that I cant distinguish what is normal teenage behaviour and what is due to her illness. If I take a step back, she accuses me of not caring and if I encourage her to face potentially stressful situations, I'm pushing her too hard. Both end up with lots of distress and crying.

I just want to help her grow into a happy, healthy and independent young adult but often seem to get it wrong. She is right in that I don't understand how hard it is to have anxiety.

But I also don't understand how that prevents her from hanging up wet towels/putting dirty clothes into the laundry bin/cooking the odd meal for the family . I should add that she is 16 and in her last year of school

Please Help!!

S

Don't know of any book, sorry. Is she being treated for her MH issues? If she is depressed then I can well imagine her not being able to be bothered about anything. I gave up trying to get my depressed DD to tidy her room - which was an absolute tip - but now she is getting better she is doing it herself. My other DD's room is also a tip but that is just because she is a teenager so I make her do it. Very hard sometimes to tell the difference.

Thanks Stopmakingsense, yes she is having treatment. She has been under CAMHS for 18months now with Anxiety, Depression and an Eating Disorder. The ED team gave me (via Family Therapy) excellent tools to help her through ED and she has been weight restored for the last 6 months but still has disordered body image leading to crippling anxiety.

She is also on 100mg Sertraline and 4mg of Melatonin.

I gave up work to get her through the ED but I feel the time is right for her to start taking back some responsibility. I know it will be baby steps for her but she seems so unwilling to even try.

I just need some tips/guidance to help her with the anxiety from a parent/carers perspective

There seems to be lots of self help stuff out there but I cant find anything for me as her parent.

Have you had a look at the Young Minds website, OP?

www.youngminds.org.uk/for_parents

I found it invaluable when DD was going through the same. It has a free helpline too, though I never tried that.

Now my DD is more stable (though still taking the sertraline) she tells me she acknowledges how hard it must have been for me, and how well-supported she felt in her darkest times. I did nothing special, just went with what I felt was right and left her alone when she seemed to need it.