Gifted and Talented? Highly Sensitive?

[JoelyB]

Yes I know. Words for entitled and stroppy.
But DD16 was home ed/ private/co-op schooled to age 14, then went into mainstream (some of that was good, some of it not so) and now she is in Y12 and really not relating to us - a lot of secrets and lies - she is quite bright (GCSEs after all the disturbance and upheaval A*, 7 As, 2 Bs) and wants to apply for Oxbridge - I'm afraid she's missed the boat to be supported as gifted and talented, and not sure what I can do now - she's detached from me and won't talk to me.
We're dealing with issues of denial over her periods (previous post refers) and honestly, I just want her to be happy and supported.
So questions:
Is there an agency I should go to?
Top books or websites?
Similar experiences?
Should I just get over it and let her find her own way?

I would talk to her sixth form tutor because it's Predicted A level grades that count. Her GCSE's are good but not outstanding. A couple of dozen kids at my sons school with 8 or more A* GCSE's this year.
Lots of advice on the Oxbridge websites.
And they are looking for students who are really passionate about the subjects they want to study.

But ultimately if she won't talk to you, there isn't a lot you can do. I beg the more you try to force her to do something the less likely she is to do
it ( I Have one of those).

History. She's a paradox. She's bright but seems to resist all direction! She went to an Oxford open day where they clearly said they're not keen on gap years. Then suddenly decided she wants to take a gap year and go to Australia!
I will see what her tutor thinks. I am at a bit of a loss! Her sister was so straightforward! !! ??

I'm not aware that Oxford have anything against gap years at all, unless you want to study maths, so can't see a problem with her having one. I think they like them to have some constructive plans for what they'll do on it, ideally related to their subject, but that's not essential.

I'm not sure schools are still obliged to be keeping lists of gifted and talented are they? And would have thought it not so useful by sixth form anyway, when they're already doing work that should be stretching them, and in class with others who are also reasonably bright. Maybe you could try to talk to the school, but with a bit of a clear set of questions or issues to raise - which might be related to her needs as a very bright and independent young girl. But some teachers IME don't think the G&T label is helpful so asking them to label her may not be the best way to help her. Depending on what sort of school she's at, they may also tell you that they don't consider her exceptionally bright (based on GCSE results), so you could then draw a bit of a blank. So better to raise specific issues you have with her and see if they can help. Schools can be quite good at dealing with kids who don't talk to their parents!

Those GCSEs will not be screaming g and t. Do you have any evidence that she is , or is otherwise Oxbridge material. Does her college routinely send students to Oxbridge and nurture such candidates? It is still early days in y12 but she needs to be aiming for As in AS. Which subjects is she taking at AS /A2 and degree she is hoping to study? I don't think a gap year would necessarily count against her application but for some courses relevant work or study experience could be useful.

Thanks for all the input.
Her cousin is in Aus and hires Au Pairs, so she could work out there.
She is in sixth form - school is the only one in town and has seldom if ever sent anyone to Oxbridge, but there is a student in Y13 applying.
She hopes to read History, is taking History, English Lit, Maths and Biology, will probably drop Bio (AS is no longer standard in all subjects, it's not clear what she's doing AS in and what not) - she's predicted A in History, A in English A/B in Bio and A in Maths.
She already has a B in AS Stats.
She's also looking at Cardiff and Exeter - she did also look at Durham but it's rumoured they put even more emphasis on GCSE grades than Oxford so may be no point.
She ought to interview well having competed successfully at public speaking and debating with her local Young Farmers' Club - she was previously dead set on Agriculture at Harper but has undergone this sudden change over the summer!
I'm feeling a lot more informed. Thanks again for the input.